What childhood?

I was watching enough rope last nite...there was John Travolta as a special guest...Andrew Denton was asking about his children. John was speaking about how his 4 year old daughter, Elle was more like a 30 year old woman...he asks the audience - dont you think kids these days are like adults...they go straight for the dresses, make up, etc...they no longer act like children...

At which point im nodding my head cos im thinking about Chloe again...

During dinner, her mother said to me that as she drove with Chloe in the front of the car to pick up her father from work...My sis-in-law said "if you dont sit down, i will spank u!" Chloe continues standing on the chair and so my sis-in-law spanks her. Now chloe proceeds to sit down, but she crosses her arms with a *hmph* and turns to the window. Her mother tries to touch her leg and apologises, and she responds with "Don't touch me please."

Remember, Chloe is only 2 years and 7 months.

My sis-in-law was telling me why Chloe doesnt like childcare. Apparently, while she is there...she doesnt play with the kids her age, she likes playing with older children or she actually follows the Supervisor of the Childcare Centre while he does his duties for the day. The Supervisor holds her hand and she just follows...a bit weird for my liking...

She is moody & melodramatic...she was singing incy-wincy spider...and i was showing her the hand movements...she couldnt do the spider action so my mum tried to help her and show her how to do it. But her hands were so rigid...she gave up and took a brochure and pretended to get excited over some Cat in the Hat advert, diverting everyone attention to that, rather than everyone fixating on her failure to do hand actions for a nursery rhyme.

Im worried about her...

Although, on Sunday morning...Chloe woke up and the dialogue between her and her parents were:

Chloe (Still in bed): "Hello, anyone there?"
Dad (Also in bed): "Sorry, no one here."
Chloe: "Okay then." (She lies back down on her bed)
Dad whispers to Mum: "Lets hide under the covers."
Chloe (Decides to be a smarty and walks up to her parents bed): "I see you!"

During the nite before, everyone was taking fotos, and fotos not of Chloe, but of her little sister Aimee. So she says to her father with her fingers clicking: "Peter! Peter, over here...look at Chloe!"

I dont know if that makes me feel any better, but i thought it was funny when her parents were telling me! *LoL*

The Price Charming Complex...

Whilst i was trying to sleep...i was listening to my Franz Ferdinand CD (much thanx to xtn) in bed...this was whilst i was having a fever (which is why many emails were unanswered from work, cos i was at home)...and as i was actually dancing under my blanket (that album is soo 80's fun)...after about 6 tracks, i slowly fell asleep...but at about 1am on Thursday morning i woke up and couldnt fall back to sleep...so, here i was half delirious - i put Franz Ferdinand back on and try to sleep...but instead i started to think of my favourite stories and what i discovered about myself is that i have a pathetic complex!

I call it my Fairytale Fantasy or my Prince Charming Complex. The books that i have read since i was a child...from the Little Golden Books on Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Beauty and the Beast, etc...you get the picture...to the more advanced hard covered version of such fairytales. Even as an adult now, i still love the Cinderella story, which is why i like Drew Barrymore's version "Ever After" oh so much!

My Complex, i think explains why im still single-by-choice. I dont "love" the idea of a prince, or want a Mary Elizabeth Donaldson sort of moment. What i have always been attracted to is the gentleman like demeanour of the prince, his masculinity, the air of romanticism, he is portrayed as a man with interpersonal and physical strength...the type of guy that is capable of sweeping me off my feet!

/pause
/rewind to reality

I have to admit now (i dont want to admit it, but i must be honest)...im a romantic through and through...im so fudgin' gay sometimes!...id like to think that i am an educated and realistic girl. I know that finding a guy like that is ultra slim, not impossible, although im not holding my breath...but i just cant settle for second best either...which is why i also accept being single.

Remember, looks isnt the part of Prince Charming that im attracted to...i think in most its his strength...most of the princes in the fairytales always save the girl at the end of the day...and more importantly...they live happily ever after...

What is your opinion on this?

You must have seen "Something about Miriam?" or the adverts on this UK show on Channel 10 at some stage right? Well, whilst i was running on the treadmill at my local gym, i watched the initial show where the 6 men were introduced to Miriam and Miriam to the world.

Now, you could say that this is like an Average Joe with a twist, because Miriam isnt quite 100% woman as the men might believe...Miriam's secret is that she is really a he with a masculine member still attached. Miriam is a transexual, who had been taking hormones since 11 years of age. Now at 21, Miriam has had breast implants but nothing surgically removed and is a model in the US.

She, well she wants to be referred to as a she...She says that she has never been in love before...well what do you expect? She was once a man and changed to a female, but still has the male part...if you want to attract a hetero male and then keep him, it would probably best to remove the penis.

BUT im not sure as to how many hetero male would accept the fact that you were male and then changed to a female...not to say that there arent men who are that open-minded...but i dare say that there are very few. As a female, i cant really speak for the mass of men out there. But im putting myself in a similar situation, where i was involved with a person who i thought was a man, but i later find out that he was a she previously...i cant say that i would accept the person...the way that they were.

I would feel a bit cheated, but then again...i cant really ask of the person to tell me straight away, like whilst we were dating...they dont owe that to anyone.

On a lighter note...we have seen scenes from the show where Miriam is getting hot and heavy with some of the guys...if Miriam still has a penis, does it not erect under feelings of arousal? So, is it an inactive penis? >_< Like OMG!!!

Whilst i was at home stuck with the flu...i was watching Oprah. Her show co-inky dinky was talking about transexuals, men who got married and had kids and then decided that they really should be women. Talk about hard stuff for the wife and kids to accept and adapt to. But they did, not to say that it wasnt a long and bumpy ride, but they are still a family unit.

One part of the show yesterday, showed a 14 year old girl, whose parents thought she was a lesbian, but later found out that she was a transexual...it was heart wrenching to hear that she, now a he is ready to date, but admits that its hard to attract girls to be interested in dating a girl who is now a guy...talk about tough love. I think its harder if you are a transexual cos as that girl, now boy, says: "...straight girls are interested in straight boys...its also hard because you are not interested in lesbians, and the lesbians are interested in feminine females anyways..."

So...what would you do, as a guy would you be accepting of Miriam?

Magnum Vice Cream - Illicit Vodka Cranberry

It will be the death of me...having a set of sweet teeth aint a good thing! But then, by golly gosh...you just gotta savour every bit of juicy pink coloured chocolate. Dont just chomp on it, and chew and swallow it down the gurgler...

Im pedantic in the way i eat my ice cream...i open one end of the wrapper...the top, so that i can easily take a bite of the ice cream and still keep my hands clean...i took a bite, allowed the chocolate to melt in my mouth... and i waited while the creamy texture just slide down my throat...*YUM*...

I savour every bite...mixture of vanilla ice cream with swirls of "vodka" sauce...not that there is any trace of alcohol in the ice cream...but yeah...mmm...

Once i finished the ice cream i noticed on the stick that there was something written on one side of it...which encouraged me to suck the rest of the ice cream and pink chocolate off the stick so that i could read the full message. What did it say? "Its our little secret..."

And although it was soo yum that i should keep it a secret...im the type of person who believes in "sharing is caring"...in terms of good food...so please...if you like sweets...go try out the new Magnum range...i dont think you could go wrong with any of the choices.

;)

pick.me.up ^

I'm not writing this to gloat...if anything its more to remind me that im not as pitiful as i may sometimes think of myself...this is for those days when all i see in front of my horizon are dark clouds...whilst this is fresh, just occurred...knowing my memory, i need to write it down so that i wont forget it!

You SO look like your mother...as my previous blog, this is a compliment...its a sign that i should age gracefully like my mother...and its nice to know that people think she looks really young for her age...so hopefully when i get to her age, i will look just as good!

There are still some men out there that believe in romance...its uplifting to know that there is still hope...that there are guys out there that want the same things that i want from a partner...those guys may not be right for me, but hey...it doesnt hurt to know such guys to help me get through those days where i sit and think "what the? where are those romantic men in the world???" right in front of me apparently! hehheehe

The world is small...6 degrees of separation...i will bump into my future partner shortly through a friend...how many people have i met through friends who have introduced their friends to me?...quite a number of them...how many bfs have i met through other friends...all of them!

My parents have shown that they are proud of me...expressed before, during and after my Graduation...my parents would have given me anything to be honest, had i asked them for it. i didnt ask for anything except that we all get there on time...i'm still waiting for my portraits to be sent to me, i think they will show two parents smiling from ear to ear!

Im surrounded by nice people...the people ino and love are beautiful beings...anybody who i would deem toxic, well...i sever all ties with such people...and hopefully i can breathe easier knowing that my judgement is still clear and i wont suffer from heartache later on...well i havent really suffered from heartache, so i guess thats a plus...

Im organized, resiliant, an angel, a champ, have a gorgeous figure...these are only a couple of the compliments i got last week from various men...young and older...i appreciate them for what they are worth...thank u...i just need to remember that they were given to me...directed to me...only for me...*LoL*

Being nice, doing helpful things for others...it makes me feel good...i like going around and, well...offer the helping hand to someone who is short of a hand (so to speak). There was a guy in a wheelchair who was in his local newsagent...i was in there during my lunch break to pick up some cards for my friends who were graduating...he dropped some coins that he was balancing off his leg. i thought it was a bit rude that surrounding people didnt even notice...so i walked over and helped him pick up his coins...he said thanks and it made me happy!

Music is good for the soul...and sometimes...jazz and blues is the cure for that heartsinking feeling you have deep within the core of yourself...a good dose of Sade makes me feel better, my favourite song is still kiss of life...drown out your sorrow by turning the music up loud...get comfy in your chair and just sink into it...

Laugh out loud...preferrably at yourself...i can say and do blonde things...so can my brothers...so can anyone really, so i honestly shouldnt call it "blonde things"...just laugh...a good hearty laugh...talk to that person who always manages to make you see the sunny side of things...in my case, its any one of my fantabulous girlfriends... *^_^*

^ pick.me.up: NO! (in a defensive tone), im not referring to getting picked up by a guy...do one of the listed things, or at least remember one of them and feel better about urself...go on...

Confronting my fears...

Growing old: Im not worried about dying...quite frankly, if you recall...i wouldnt mind dying when i reach 30. Thats not long considering that im 23 now...but hey, thats what i want, not sure if im gonna get it...but anyways...i fear looking terrible when i age...like when i get to 50...how would i look? Id like to age gracefully...but who knows...?

Im grateful that everyone says (well researchers & doctors alike), you just need to look to your parents for the blue prints of your future. My mother will be 50 this year, and to me...she is looking fit for her age. She still has a great figure, curves in the right places...although after 3 children she has a bit of a belly...but i think that comes with the territory of being a mum.

Being lonely: So, long as i have friends...so long as i can keep myself busy...i dont feel lonely. I read a friends blog...and he said he wanted to enter in the Archibald one day...i wouldnt mind doing that one day too...i loved painting and making sculptures...i want to buy an easel and paint more often...i'll do it one day, when im bored and feeling lonesome.

Cleaning my room: I am literally scared of cleaning my room...I may appear to be an immaculate perfectionist on the outside...and i am. But like most genius' (im not...but to colourfully paint my picture, i'll use this analogy), i have a room that looks like a tornado has hit it.

I fear that if i clean my room...i will lose all the things that i treasure...or i may throw out something that i will need in a months time. I have placed everything within arms length...ahahhaa...even though it looks messy, i know where everything is currently located.

I dont think it helps much that my room is tiny and yet i have over 70 pairs of shoes, over 50 bags, and so many pieces of clothing!!! Its crazy!!! I think i will make this another project for my bored days...

Motherhood: I think every woman can honestly say that she didnt know what to expect or whether she would be a good mother...as i carry Aimee (niece #2) in my arms, i think "gee...i put her to sleep...maybe i could be a mother after all..." Although, i dont want kids...is that selfish of me? Possibly, but then again, to me...i think im being a good samaritan to the future poor soul who would have been unfortunate enough to get the short straw and be my kid.

I think im irresponsible, hot tempered, irrational, impatient, all of the bad things under the sun! But hey, im being honest...i shouldnt "cut it" to be a mother...but im not anti-motherhood either. I'm not a feminist in that way. I believe woman have the choice to be mothers, and i believe that if u want kids, then you should be responsible about it and be at home for your children as much as you can.

I think, preferrably...you should be an at home mother until your child is old enough to fully express whatever pain they are feeling, or when they can tell you specifically that it was Kathy who kicked her shin during lunch, so that you can go in and tell Kathy's mother off for being a bad mother...or instructing your child to kick Kathy back when she gets the first chance!!! (You see, im too volatile...not good for motherhood!)

2 year old vegetarians: my niece #1 - Chloe...she is a vegetarian by choice. She didnt want to drink milk from about the age of 4 months...according to the child psychologist, in her mind, because she is very mature...she wants to eat the food we (adults) eat. What i want to know, is what made her decide to abstain from eating meat?! Hello, us adults that surround her are all meat eaters!!! If she wants to eat what we want to eat, then why isnt she eating meat?! Give her any form of greens, and she will consume it like no tomoro...give her a bite of beef/pork/fish/chicken/etc...and she will push the spoon/fork away and say "NO!"

She is not only a vegetarian by choice, but she has mood swings and gets upset...sometimes she does resemble an adult with depression...especially when her sister Aimee was born...she actually went on a starvation strike! I had to lure her out to McD's one day so that she could play in the playground and get a free toy with the Happy Meal...and altho it may not be the most nutritious meal ever...i was over the moon that she ate 3/4 of the cheeseburger and some fries and she was eating my berri-nice yogurt. She wouldnt eat dinner the nite before and she wouldnt have breakfast...so you can see why i was over the moon that she ate, let alone consuming something that resembled meat!

What worries me further is the fact that Aimee who is only 2 months old...is actually laughing and responds when you call or speak to her...not that its a bad thing that a baby can respond to someone calling her or speaking to her...its just a matter of how developed her mind is that im a bit worried about. If Chloe is a 2 y/o vegetarian by choice...what will Aimee be at 2? What will happen when they reach their teens?

I look at my younger brother and his declarations of love to his gf. He argues with my mother that he is "old enough" now. All these young beings thinking that they are old enough really worries me further. I look at my cousins, all of whom have had boyfriends when they were as young as 11 y/o. At this point i cry "What is wrong with today's youths?"

One of my cousins use to feel strongly about family and the bonds we share...at family outings - she would be there playing with the younger kids, because she loved kids...now, you wouldnt find her even close to a family outing...she would be out with her bf. Altho they go to the same College...and see eachother because they are in the same classes...and she sees him every nite and most mornings he would be picking her up...and all weekend if they arent working they would be seeing eachother...

Im the claustraphobic type...if i saw my partner that much, i think i would hyperventilate and pass out from seeing him too much...Her mother is worried...not that my cousin cares...she use to be trustworthy, now you cant rely on her to be there like before...And this isnt her first boyfriend either...I guess she feels that she loves this bf more than any other before, which would explain her behaviour today.

This is getting too long...i think im just going to end it here...

uhh...*blank*

I'm either:

(1) coming down with a cold or flu

(2) bored with the lack there of a challenge

(3) got a migraine

(4) suffering from a mental block

(5) allergic to work

OR

it may be all of the above...
=(

Please please pretty please...i want to be well for what i have planned for Mother's Day!

The Suit Factor!

Disclaimer: This isnt an accurate account, this is purely based on my opinion...Often it is due to girlfriends asking "What do you think of him?" So, please dont take this as gospel, but i can say that the underlying fact is that most girls do agree with this idea, maybe just not in the exact terms of my gradient.

The Suit Factor: For me, I dont often rate guys...i dont know why, i just dont. Not until a girlfriend asks me for my opinion on a guy that she has spotted. And usually in response, I would say "he's okay"..."hehehe, he is cute"..."i like his smile"...im more descriptive than numerical when it comes to rating.

When my friend asks about a guy in a fitted suit, now this is the grunt of the conversation, he generally will get a better rating than he would in ill-fitting casual gear, or even if he was in fitting casual gear! If you are an average guy with a suit that fits, let me insist that you take up all the opportunities you can get and wear it! I really do implore you to do so. You dont understand what sort of impact that it has on women!

A guy in a fitted suit will generally get an "OMG he is cute" versus any other time he would have been a "yeah...he's alright..." Thats based on a general consensus with my fellow female friends...remember this isnt gospel...but most women would agree that a guy is mega-watt-ed HOT if he is groomed and wearing a fitting suit...tailored suits is preferred by this chickie...but, hey i wont know from a glance at a distance. Okay, from the stare not just a glance! but still at a distance.

For all the guys reading this, i'll put this into a more tangible, logical form so that you can get your mind to understand the importance of wearing a fitting suit! On a scale between 1 to 10, 1 for bad, 5 for average, 10 for OMFG HOT! If i have to give a rating, i never give more than an 8. Thats just me, im pretty harsh...and i tend to give full marks for the full package: so its not just looks, it includes personality too!

Now, often when i say a guy is "okay" that equates to about a 5...so pop a fitting suit on a guy that normally gets a 5, and he will be bumped up to an 8...for me, the deviant is a +3. For guys who rate below average, say numerically he was a 3, pop him in a fitting suit and he will be a 6. Now, that is a fair jump from below average to above average. But, do you see what the magic of a really good fitting suit can do for you?

Its not always a +3, thats just for example sake...to give you an idea. But hey, just get it into your minds that you could potentially be "dateable" instead of "forgettable". All it takes is a good fitting suit. If you still dont believe me, do what a friend of ours did. Go to a store and try on two separate suits. One more expensive than the other, and you will find that the more expensive suit tends to be more fitted, and i think that is based on the pattern it was cut from. Basically, invest in a suit...it is costly, i dont disagree with you there, but you should look at it as an investment! The more expensive suit, you will find sinches in the waist where it should, the arm length tends to sit just below the wrist, the suit just sits perfectly aligned with your shoulders...

With every good suit, it helps if you have polished shoes to match. And i dont mean that if you are wearing a pin striped suit, to wear pin striped shoes...i dont think they even exist...hehehe... What i mean is if you are wearing an expensive suit, dont go and wear cheap scuffed shoes. Wear a pair of shoes that are appropriate. It will also help if you are groomed...clean hair tends to lend a hand in the "attractive" department.

Dont get me wrong, im not bagging guys out...im really just trying to offer some insight and mostly my opinion. This goes both ways...

Women should also wear fitted suits. It could make the difference between having a waist or looking like a tree trunk. I have also been told by guys that one of the "sexy" looks for them, is a woman in a good suit jacket with matching pencil skirt and heels. And i must admit, a guy stopped for me at work today - to pave a way for me to walk past. It could have been a coincidence, but hey, i'll just use it to back up my argument!

What am i wearing? I'm wearing the tweed suit jacket that i bought for my Graduation...with a black pencil skirt and black stilettos. I may not look like da bomb! but i can safely say, cos the tweed suit jacket sits perfectly, combined with my faithful black pencil skirt, i look much better than i usually do. I probably got bumped from "pretty plain" to "hey, she's pretty cute..."

Fitted suits sit well, it seems to fit like a glove. Its not tight, like you are wrapped by glad wrap. Its not loose either, like its hanging off a hanger or swimming on you. It just sits.

Secret seductions...

For a very long time now ive been feeling cold. Its been a good 12 months where any sense of desire was, well non existent. I attributed that lack of feeling to the fact that i thought zero attractive men existed anymore. I use to go out trying to spot a piece of hunk, but failed to do so. My friends and i made a game out of it, "Spot the Cute Guy!" But to no avail, we failed so dismally that i pretty much gave up.

Im not looking for a handsome bf, im not even looking for a bf...all i wanted was to spot a good looking guy for a simple perve, and there was none. So...thats why i thought, "i understand why my sensual sensation has basically dissipated..."

I told a friend a while ago, that i no longer felt desire and she said that it was sad...but what could i do?

The feelings of seduction, sensuality, desire...they complicate matters...so for longer than a year, ive been level-headed about everything...but i think my brain needs a break! I also miss those sensations. The tingling all over...its also fun to be wrapped up in ecstasy due to those feelings.

Look, im being frank...i desired nothing...and i didnt feel like i was desired.

I think im at a turning point, especially after my long weekend trips out in the serene environment. I've gotten to know some people better...and all this time being so senseless, i think attributes to a heightened sort of alertness in appreciating people and their most desirable features. Which miraculously brought back my sense of desire...and some secret seductions.

I have a friend, who is an utter gentleman...and im in love with that aspect of him. I have another friend, who gives the best hugs...another friend who always A.L.W.A.Y.S smells so yumdiddlyscrumptious...now if only i could marry these parts of these guys together and ill have my piece of hunk to feel sensual in particular about!

But for the mean time...its nice to feel sexy and womanly again...i was a bit asexual for a moment there...

OMGosh!

It was absolutely smashing...the plates that is! hehehe

I was soo stressed when we were on our way to my Graduation...but after i got there, things sorta panned out...spent a quick $500 on fotos, plaques, more fotos, and framing, and a bear, etc.

I was also very stressed while i was being driven to Mykonos for my party (I thought i was gonna be heaps late)! I have pictures, as do everyone armed with a digital camera...and wouldnt uno it? my comp crashed and i need to reformat it before i can upload my piccies! *bummer*

Everyone who came to my party, a big THANK U! *huggles* Uno, it beats my 21st birthday party...and i mean who wouldnt be stoked when they get a ticket to the JT concert?! *phwoah* hehehe
=P

I got heaps of pretty jewellery...pretty silver...im surprised, how did uno i prefer silver to gold?

I got this funky thermometer, sorta cross between lava lamp and glass ornament. It comes complete with pretty bubbles. I also received some foto frames, which is warranted, cos of my Grad fotos.

For those who didnt go, i was dancing on a chair and my friend gave me $20. ahahaha...then a friend asked me to dance on the table, but i said he had to pay me $100. He said i had to dance first, i said he had to pay first...it didnt eventuate. *LoL* I think he was trying to take me for a ride...just cos i was handed a strawberry daiquari...and for those who dont know, thats like the first drink i have ever had...but i swear, she said there was no alcohol in it!!! but that shot of it was toxic! =P *bleh* *coughcough*

There was a belly dancer and indeedy, my friends pushed me towards the circle and she was trying to teach me how to bellydance, i think i was just being an idiot swivelling my hips, and sadly there is a video of it and plenty of fotos! *i hang my head in shame* I specifically said no video cameras, and what does E do? He brings a video camera, a digital camera and a pink Hawaiian lei to "lay" me! What i ask him to bring, he doesnt! What i ask him not to bring, he brings it! =P

I missed out on 2 male strippers apparently, im disappointed...i basically left my own party before it was really over! *LoL* But hey, i got to smash plates, i managed to get more food when there was none left, and there was so much alcohol that many were merrily drunk! Someone slapped me on the ass, i think ino who...i got so many hugs from ppl i knew and from ppl who were complete strangers...

One of the highlight of the nite was guessing on whether or not this cute guy was gay or not...just cos he was talking about shoes doesnt mean he is gay, he can be sooo metro!!! *sigh* Oh well, he left before the party really began...pity, i didnt get a chance to dance with him and blame it on the fact that i was intoxicated! ahahaha
;)

I'll post the piccies up somewhere when i get chance...Michael Buble cd transferred from md is on hold...friend is having probs! *double bummer*

I empathise...

I was reading this and I was picturing myself saying those exact words to someone i currently feel that way about.

Im tired of people who are now adults but are not just young at heart, but are actually young in the head too!

If someone says no, dont persist like a 5 y/o...and whinge and complain. You were one straw short of throwing yourself on the floor with a tantrum...how selfish are you? your arguement was based on the fact that "you dont have many long weekends to go out". When the other person said no, they indicated that they were very tired...they didnt want to drive far...and they had to work the next day and didnt want to be buggered when they arrived at work. Which in my opinion is fair...in their defence i suggest to you "why dont you drive?" Your only response to that was silence...but that didnt last long...because within a minute you were back harping on the fact that YOU wanted to go out!

Other plans were made to just go to someone's house and relax...you managed to screw that up at 1:30am when everything was planned out and organised. You didnt care about how others felt...all you cared was that you got your way.

I just cant believe that im associated to an inconsiderate little whench, who is only self serving! You have no feelings, no morals, you are disrespectful to everyone...and yet there you are sitting on a high horse...GET OVER YOURSELF!

Elle Woods...

I have a pink tweed suit ready for my Graduation...I would feel better wearing the tweed jacket with a pair of jeans...but i dont think jeans would look good under the robe during the Graduation Ceremony...

I actually purchased a pair of pink heels to match my outfit...and it just struck me that i dont have a bag to match...*pooh*...i have a pink handbag...but its the wrong pink...
=(

I may have to resort to my brown lil oroton purse...so i can carry my drivers license and cards...to pay for the photos and framing of the degree...

I was considering on wearing a string of pearls a la Elle Woods...but i just cant do it...ahahhaaha...that would just be toppling the neat and chic to omg! tacky. And its also a tad too mumsy for my liking...

Its funny...my lil brother is skipping school for my Graduation and he came up to me last nite and asked "what do i wear?"... you'd think that it was my wedding. ahahaha

Now, question is what do i wear to my party on Saturday nite???

Collagen or Botox?

Its ironic...my mother warns me right before i leave the house to go to the National Park, she says: "don't get burnt...did you bring sunscreen?"

I'm like: "yes mum...i brought the 30+ sunscreen...i'll be fine!"

I come home and she took one look at me and was disappointed. Since my Graduation is this Friday...and that just occured on Monday...it doesnt give me much time to heal...

To be honest i think its funny, in retrospect...its just a fat lip...and it has subsided a little bit, much thanks to the boiled egg i was rolling over the top of my right lip.

What does it look like? Its like i had really bad cosmetic surgery done! Its not bruised, just swollen...and its made my normally full lips look totally disproportioned. I was seriously considering playing volleyball and getting hit by the ball on my left side of the lips so that it would even out! ahahaha...then mum would have seriously killed me!

How did i get the fat lip in the first place? Well, we rented out 2 canoes and one row boat cos there was 7 of us...initially i was just gonna sit in the row boat while 2 friends rowed the boat...but my best friend was splashing too much (with the oar) and i was getting soaked...once we docked i swapped with another friend in a canoe. She hopped into the row boat, while i got into the canoe taking her spot. For revenge along a quiet strip of water i got my best friend drenched. She wanted revenge, but since rowing is harder and two girls who have never rowed before, are quite unco about it...they zig-zagged for a very long time, so i reached the dock with my friend way before they could catch up. But since we were in the busy part of the river (heaps of people on those big water bikes), i didnt think that my friends would try to get me back...but they did. In the process of defending myself, the handle of my oar went smack bang into my mouth!

This hasnt deterred me from canoeing...i love it! and there was this spot that we reached (that i was surprised that the thought even popped into my head)...i think it would make a good "Proposal Place"...and one of my male friends said that that was what he thought. You could have a fabulous picnic there, the serenity and intimacy of picnicing on a rock whilst the sun goes down...very Japanese Story...! Its weird...i thought that i would like to be wined and dined at some chic restaurant before a show and i derno, be proposed to under the stars...ahahahaha...but i quite like the idea of canoeing to a secluded place and upon reaching the destination - finding a picnic already laid out...and if a guy proposed to me there, even in my cargos and singlet after working up a sweat rowing there...i would say yes to him!

I dont like the thought of fishing...but after yesterday, I can see myself fishing in a boat, just sitting there so long as the weather is good...with the sun either just coming up or just going down...with a slight breeze, i could fish all day...heheheh...i think the "great outdoors petals" had been dormant, just waiting for someone to coax her out...and it finally happened! Thanks to you! ;)

My Buble...

"I see alot of gentlemen out there tonite...ino it was your wife or gf or bf who brought you here...*laughs*...they said (impersonating a female voice) 'lets go watch michael buble'...(impersonating a deeper male voice) 'michael buble???'...it doesnt matter that you didnt want to be here...cos its not about me tonite, its not even about the music and its definitely not about these guys (points to the band behind him)...its about the good men out there, the nice ones...its about helping those men get laid tonite!"

Audience starts clapping mad...

At which point two men from front row got up and shook Michael Buble's hand for his help in getting them *some* for the nite...hehehe

This guy is a star! Its not just about his voice...he has a charisma...a presence on stage...he can dance...he connects with the audience...when his band puts him on the spot, he lives up to the challenge...he isnt afraid to poke fun of himself...and he is humble!

I watched Michael Buble at the Opera House last nite and im still smiling about it! He took my breath away and put a warm fuzzy glow in my stomach. When i think about the performance, i just secretly smile! He sang all the songs from his album...and then he sang his favourite songs...a song dedicated to his grandfather...a song that he sang at his first Talent show at 16 y/o...he sang Kermit the Frog's - Rainbow Connection, a Lenny Kravitz song, he started skatting (awesome) and then he turned and sang Mack the Knife...he did Funny Valentine (and i just *swoooned*).

M will hate the fact that she missed this concert...i mentioned earlier that his band had put him on the spot...what they did was...initially...somehow Michael started talking about Michael Jackson...so he started singing a young Michael Jackson song (can't remember what it was) and it was cut short cos it was just a joke...Michael continued talking to us and then the drummer was starting to play Billy Jean and coaxed the other band members to play too...Michael didn't see this coming...and the audience cheered Michael to sing...and he did and in the second verse...he just didnt know the words and said "get to the chorus"...it was brilliant and fun! ^_^

Time just flew by...i remember when we first sat down in our seats there was this older woman in her late 50s or early 60s who was there to watch the show on her own...and then a couple came along...surprisingly that couple was that older woman's friends that she hasnt seen in 20 years (so they told me while they laughed with tears in their eyes)...i think that was icing on the cake! Imagine going to a concert on your own and ur friends that you havent seen for an ultra long time happen to go to the same concert and have the two tickets right next to you!
*^_^*

I did a bad thing though last nite, but that bad thing will bring me joy for a really long time...i brought my MD and recorded the concert...ino i wasnt allowed, but i regret not recording Jewel in the Concert Hall...that venue makes the singer's voice resonate...having the equipment...being in the Concert Hall...knowing that Michael would sound fantastic...i would have been a fool not to record Michael Buble!

So i did, and i listened to it while i slept last nite, i think i floated to heaven...

Social Observation: Is 30 the new 20?

I recall in an email spam where we discussed 30-somethings at the parties that us 20-somethings happened to be at too. A friend said that we could bash him if we found him at a club or party when he was 30-something...cos it was just way too sad.

According to an article i read in this months Cosmo, us 20-somethings seem to be getting younger, partying harder, or resisting long term relationships, even though we are approaching the big 3-0. What a lot of 20-somethings offer is that we are more inclined to finding out who we are and want to "play" for an extra decade before settling down...and i agree.

Think about our parents...once they hit an "appropriate" age, they got married and had kids...paid off the mortgage...and tried to hold the fort down at home with the level of stress at work rising. It would have been very difficult to find some parents who lived their lives before they settled down, and if there is a set of parents who had many adventures before marrying...i think in their time...they would have been considered weird.

Today, if i had said that i wanted to travel around Europe before going to Uni it wouldnt be too weird...only in asian circles would it seem like blasphemy...against your parents wish of you studying medicine/law/pharmacy/optometry/dentistry/finance/accounting/you get my drift...but to be honest, i have mentioned to my mother that before i would even consider settling down...i want to travel the world...i cant wait to do Europe...i think i would especially adore France...only because i can get a handle of the language...hehehe...but anyways...my mother agrees...she encourages me to travel the world...and more so, explore the things that i would like to accomplish.

Im in my early 20s and like i said in the blog before my 23rd birthday, i feel more like im turning 20 than im turning an age that is fast approaching the mid-20s. Im not surprised that there has been this observation that 30 is the new 20. Most people ino now are in their mid-20s or have just past it and are single, carefree, fun-loving, and enjoying life. I saw it in my aunt who is, i think, 32 this year. She has been travelling the world...nurturing her career...and excelling in being a great aunt to her little neice and nephews (the ones younger than me, of course...hehehe).

Im wondering if this has any correllation to the way we were brought up...generation by generation...we sorta had a lil bit of indepedence as kids...a lot of the times we were more innocent and were hidden from the dramas of life...usually at home...id like to think our parents and the schools taught us to be cautious...i was also brought up informed and aware that sometimes it just takes time to find what you want to do and how to go about getting it.

If everyone in the same age gap as i am in, was taught the same things, of course then, we wouldnt be in a rush to get from A to B. Im open to exploration...quite frankly ino im not going to stay in the same industry as far as my career is concerned. But as to what i want to do after IT...i dont know...but i have about a decade to find out before the crunch of having a stable career will really hit me. Thats according to this social observation.

I was considering my younger brother's age group...because he is 6 years younger...and he is always claiming that "things are now different to when you were in high school" to me...when he is in his 20s will their group revert back to the way our parents were? and the new 20 will just be 20?

I say this, much based around my brother and his friends. They are a bunch of 16 y/o with jobs that pay well for a bunch of 16 y/o...im not talking Mc D's...im talking about selling mobiles, and gadgets...while my brother fixes mobile fones. My brother now buys things that he use to ask me to buy for him for his birthday, or Christmas...or "if i wanted to be a good sister"...that would mean a pair of lee jeans...altho he has a hankering for a pair of tsubi's...which i might get him for his birthday...but thats much to be decided upon on whether i want to be a good sister or not, or he may get it before i offer...he has a flavour for Industry clothes, anything urban esp mooks...he is always accessorising - were talking belts, hats, wrist bands, coloured hair gels, etc...he just bought himself a pair of nike bball shoes - the new ol' skool type...and he is currently sporting a mohawk.

Its been peeving me off lately that he thinks he can act like an adult...going to a party at Gas on a Tuesday nite and coming home after 2am on Wednesday...sorry, i dont give a shiet on whether or not its the holidays...kids who are 16 shouldnt be that far from home at that time of nite. What shiets me further is that he didnt ask my parents if he could go, he just said "im going to this party on Tuesday nite."

hmm...this blog isnt about my lil bro's lack of respect and respect for authority in our household...so im gonna move right along...

The point about my lil bro and his friends, in relation to what i intended on writing about, is that because they are more independent now that they are still young...this is much due to the fact that there is a lot of dosh flowing...because they are being more adult-like than perhaps we were at their age...because they are all in long relationships at a tender age...they may foolishly think that they know what they want...and that is, the lot. House, wife, kids and career...and they may go all out and just achieve all those things before they realise that they didnt enjoy life more in their 20s.

Or, his generation may actually find the perfect blend in which my generation seems to be using a 10 year delay tactic to over come - not that it should sound like a bad thing.

I like the fact that it has been widely acknowledged that 30 is the new 20...it gives me more time, the time that i was going to use anyway...but now, i wont look like a sad forlorn spinster working out her life. Now im a trendy 20-something who is only at the start of finding out who she is and enjoying life without anyone querying about it! Except for the dreaded asian community...someone should hurry up and publish an article in the Chinese/Vietnamese Newspapers about & recommending this, and the news will run faster than a fire through a village built out of wood. And then the asians will act like they set the bar for this "30 is the new 20" thing. And then, your parents will come up to you and urge you not to get married so soon and pop out the grand kids!!! *Wishful thinking?*

Hahaha...i should stop being so mean!

Light up Sydney!

If i wasn't going to Mey's party tomoro nite, i sooo would have gone to this.

I wish there was a day time version of it since i will be in the city anyways...

But i will boogie woogie the nite away! ^_^

She has no shame.

The three of us had an enjoyable lunch. We also had a fun time getting the nibblies for the Farewell drinks at work. When we got back to work there she was, apparently fuming. I thought she was joking when she opened her car door and slammed it into u...I mean, I even said "Hi!" to her...but she rudely replied with silence. I think that was the point when phil and i just continued walking to the front door. As we were walking, approaching the steps...in the background i hear a slap amidst the quarrel...i think u organised lunch with her, but u forgot and she waited for u to return...i dont know why she didnt call ur mobile, because your phone was on...i remember phil using ur phone to call alex.

phil and i took a couple more steps and as we approached the door, we both hear another slap, and phil turned to me and said: "gee, that was a loud slap...i wouldnt take that from my woman, especially not in front of my work mates!"

and thats when i pointedly said to phil: "i would never do that to my guy, especially not in public. whatever that needs to be discussed, should be discussed in private. a man needs to be treated like a man - shown that respect, so that others will show him respect...at least in public!"

obviously that is me, and i cant say that for other women out there. but i feel like i get kicked in the gut when i see girls treating guys like dirt...i mean worse than dogs, cos those type of women would be pampering their dogs...

ive sat in the car to go to lunch with both of you before...we were gonna go to lunch and she was bored, so she joined us...i hopped into your car, and she just stood their waiting for you to open the door, and when you did, she refused to sit down...the car seat was apparently too dirty for her highness' arse! lucky for her, you had a bag of old clothes that you were going to put in a bin for charity. and so you took some old t-shirts and lined the chair for her, including the chair's back.

during that car ride she kept calling you a wanker, and at first i thought perhaps it was a pet name thing...quirky couple...who knows right? well the ride to the shops and the ride back...i actually lost count on how many times she called you a bloody wanker! i'm sorry, but i think its utterly disrespectful that she was calling you names, and all you had were sweet names for her, like hun...my princess...etc...

she isnt completely to blame for your mistreatment, uno...obviously you are putting up with it, although...if i were you, id boot her precious butt right out of the door! you are a great guy...funny, considerate, hard working, attractive...etc...i dont know why you sit there and take it? you are far more attractive than she is, far more attractive personality-wise than she is. whilst she is just plain mean!

so is it true when they say that you gotta be mean to keep them keen?

i mean, im difficult but i dont roll a guy flat out like a steamroller! she could bulldoze you my friend and the saddistic thing, is that you would be there taking it in stride! at which point i must ask you: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???"

i was about to walk into our departments office, when you catch up with me. you come after me with the bag of nibblies and a red left cheek in tow...you act as though nothing has happened...and although i want to ask you a million questions as to why you are still with her and why you feel you must cop the abuse...cos both phil and i would dump her in an instant...i bite my tongue and act like nothing happened!

Is something wrong with me?

I'm not sure how to explain how im feeling lately...

Is it simply because i'm so busy that i dont feel lonely or have i accepted the fact that im single? I know i dont want a bf...but is that my true feelings. I dont know what i want really, about anything in my life...but i think i want to be single...wait - i know i want to be single! But the confusing thing is, i have known the inner Petals tricking the Petals on the outside...so right now, im not sure if i "really" want to be alone, or i just think that is what i want, and have convinced myself so...

I actually want to be at home...and go into hibernation like a bear...that would be my ultimate dream come true...but im so busy - im just out there doing something somewhere sometime - well nearly all the time.

When i was playing touch footy at Bulli Beach on the grassy area...i took my thongs(flip flops) off so i could run...i havent walked barefooted on grass for years...i found myself walking in a weird way...like the skin on the bottom of my feet was ultra delicate and would break upon contact with the grass...my inhibitions were gone when the game started...but i miss the simple things...

I miss family traditions...like our beach days...which was usually a public holiday...cos that was when dad was free to take us to the National Park or to Wollongong, or Newcastle, etc...

I miss having my own picnics in the yard...and just lying on the ground and staring at the clouds...and when feeling like a challenge, doing some somersaults...

I woke up this morning and flicked on the tv...im torn between being clued in with the news and watching cartoons! Dragonball had morphed into something else, im like 3 generations behind in the story! =( Apparently, Astroboy is making a come back on ABC...its suppose to be on soon. I've asked my friend to find out the time and date cos he works with ABC...but i have a feeling, because its a "new generation" Astroboy...its gonna be shiet like how Transformers came back all ultra slick looking, but the stories lacked depth! *pooh*

I'm not even looking forward to going to Michael Buble @ Opera House anymore...I heard him croon to Sway on the radio as i was getting my lunch today...it didnt make me sway like it normally would...[i must be sick!]

I was resolved at one moment...now im just tired + irritable...im not even looking forward to my own party, let alone organise my best friends shindig...my mother said to me "I dont know what to wear on the 30th April." I stared at her blankly, thinking it was another wedding...and when she failed to reply to my deadpan expression i asked her "What is on the 30th?" Which in reply, she alternatively gave me a deadpan expression. It took me a good 5 mins to realise she was referring to my Graduation Ceremony. I dont think i care anymore...its more of a hassle, cos now i have to look for something to wear under the black gown. *hmph*

One moment ago, i was embracing my full life. But now, i think i just want to get back to the simple things in life...streamline my life...or move to Melbourne - where it is quieter, but i can still shop crazily - whatever option is quickest to achieve!

I dont think that im currently lacking in challenges, as im currently been thrown a whole heap of projects to do at work on top of my daily tasks. I've started a heavier regime at the gym, so my energy levels should be perking up...i hope im not getting sick!

*bleh*

Easter Tan

I didnt think i would get a tan over the Easter break...i didnt plan to go to the beach either...i didnt plan to spend so much time with my high school buddies...nor did i plan to dance at a party for hours on end....i didnt plan to play xbox esp halo and get so addicted that i played it after going to the beach...i didnt plan to go swimming at the local pools especially after going to the beach...i didnt plan on getting an ultra sore body cos after boogie boarding and having waves breaking on me, we were throwing the vortex around...which was fun until i got injured...AND we played touch footy after lunch! I havent played anything competitive since high school...and i became really competitive after 10 mins of running bare footed dodging people before i got tipped...my body balance class really helped me, cos i was leaping in bounds! ahahaha...cos im asthmatic...i really surprised my high school friends...i out ran them! hehehe ^_^

on another note, whilst i was applying sunscreen on my legs at the beach...my forthright friend said: "So whats up with u and ?"
O_o: 'Nothing...were just friends.'
Forthright friend: "I hope your not going out with him!"
O_o: 'NO! were just friends...i dont even like him!'
Forthright friend: "You know your too good for him!?"
O_o: 'Err...okay...'
Forthright friend: "I just wanted you to know that u deserve better, thats all! He isnt right for you...he's not good enough!"

I never thought my forthright friend would say that to me...cos she is like the last person who should be giving me advice on guys...let alone on a guy that she doesnt really know that well...i mean...i know he isnt a good bf candidate for moi...and im not interested in him that way...he is a good person and he is loyal and trustworthy and on time! that makes him a brilliant friend! im not the type of person who turns ppl away cos they arent good bf material...im not like that, i like giving ppl chances and i like to make new friends! I dont look at guys and wonder if they will be my next boyfriend...i look at guys and think: "hey...he is funny *hehehe*, i'd like a friend like that!"

on the next note: whoever thinks that 50 first dates is crap, is in my opinion narrow minded! its a good movie for what it is...i mean the movie isnt trying to be an epic love saga...its a romatic comedy, Drew-Sandler style...ie its suppose to be like a Wedding Singer...its suppose to generate laughs from silly tomfoolery...it was meant to have some bad jokes that were utterly lame...but got a giggle or two out of you! if you expected more then u were cheating urself out of a simple feel good movie that was light hearted and entertaining! =P

after a 4 day long weekend...i feel restless at work...i just want to sleep at home like i did on Sunday ALL DAY ALL NITE! hehehe...im such a bum...i dont think it helps that my manager is not in yet...and its lunch time! >_<

*sigh*

Somethings missing...

I havent been catching the train to work for about 4 months now...instead i have been driving...

Whilst driving is quicker than the train...i realised today, from my train ride with friends, that there was something missing in my mornings and evenings now that i drive...

When i use to catch the train i read heaps more...the time on the train was reading time...the imaginary world was so lush...now its fairly dull...*bummer*...i need to read more, but since i save time by driving to work, and i cant really read while driving...i spend my time saved with friends or at the gym...or doing something...which isnt such a bad trade off...to be honest...but the ride today with friends was a hoot...i laughed til my throat ached...and i miss that!

Not all train rides are as hysterical as todays...but i would like that reading time...and i would like that gossiping time too! But that only comes with train buddy...and since M and i catch the same trains even when we transfer...its fun! We dont get to have our chuckles at the gym anymore because she is busy with her assignments...so the train ride is a good way to catch up.

I remember the rides to uni with all my friends...id catch the earlier train just to meet up with my friends...that was the social time that we could really devote because we were inundated with assignments, work, projects, partners, etc. It was made easier, because we all went to the same uni...so the ride on the train would be filled with gossip, and when we got off the train...the gossip would continue until we split to go our separate ways! hehehehe

I see my friends sporadically now...because they hmm...are more homebodies than i am? If we go out, it is usually an occasion...someone's birthday, graduation, some sort of celebratory thing in which they have to put the effort in to turn up. We use to go out more, that was when i use to organise things...but since i stopped organising events...no one else did...which is why we dont often see eachother...to me its silly...its like Valentine's Day...why do ppl wait until its V'day to send flowers? Well, why must ppl wait until its someone's birthday before u visit them or call to say hello? Why couldnt u just do that on a rainy Sunday arvo when you had a moment to urself?!

Clarity...

I should clarify some things...

I was wrong to say that there are no cute guys out there...cos there are...apparently im just looking in the wrong places...

I was wrong to say that i had never received a love letter in my whole entire life...i went through my stuf looking for my tax return letter from last year and i came across an express post envelope from one of my ex...he sent me a little note from work one day...

"Hi Dear,

How do you do today?
I miss you!
^_^

Signed Ex."

I smiled while reading the simple hand written message...in the envelope there was something that he made with his own hands for me (which i think i treasure more than the thing he bought me for our anniversary)...i remember the story behind it, something that he told me after i received the envelope while we were on the train going to work...

It was sweet...and i really appreciate it...cos without it, i wouldnt have this beautiful memory...
*^_^*

23 Today!

Thank you to everyone who have wished me a Happy Birthday so far...it means the world to me that i have such lovely friends who wish me all the best & it all started at midnite on the dot!

^_^

It started with Bun and his msg wishing me a Happy 19th Birthday! ahahahaha...(You just know how to make me feel like a youngen! Oh so Teeny bopper, eh?)

Then i received an sms slightly after 00:00 from a friend that was least expected cos we havent spoken for so long...and if i was still crushing on him...i would still be swooning over it! hehehe

This morning on the train...my best friend wished me the best day ever and was hoping that i would be bumping into hot guys all day and to perve on behalf of her!

I came into work and i see a couple of e-cards being sent me way! *^_^* Another sms popped up on the fone from James.

I go to this blog and i see a tag from Mey and a mention on her blog...and throughout the day i see other tags popping up too...Thank You my sweet hearts! *mwah*

Another email from another friend..."May you meet many more hunky guys in suits this year :p" ...

My ex just sent me an e-card as i was typing this...kekeke...

I even got an anonymous sms...which really means i just didnt store the number from the person who sent it to me. ahahaha

I'm so touched i think im gonna cry...

*mental note: stop being gay petals!

Ironies thus far...

So im turning 23 tomoro and yet i dont feel like im getting older...im at that fun yet awkward stage...like when ur turning 20...ur no longer a teen, and yet ur not quite an adult...

Other ironies i have come across in the past week:

(1) I'm going to the gym to tone up and hopefully lose some weight. When i finally made the conscious decision to go to the gym and do something positive, who comes to serve me at the counter on my first trip back? None other than a girl named Ana.

(2) I dislike Gwyneth Paltrow - i refuse to watch movies that she is in - even if the reviews say that she is excellent in it - her bloody academy award teary eyed thing just made me sick!!! and since Jackio O lurves her...i dislike Jackie O by her association (admiration) of the said disliked one!

(3) I whine about my skirt and heels run on M's blog and yet its due to that skirt and those heels that i received the compliment of the day. While fruit&vege shopping with my mother on Thursday nite, the grocer caught me returning a trolley-with-a-mind-of-its-own and he helped me replace it after i grabbed another...and i politely say thank u to him for putting it back for me...he replies "I only help beautiful ladies!" Like OMFG...if only he knew how much that had made my day! *LoL*

(4) Every female has a vice. It can be anything but they all have at least one. I on the other hand have a vice for almost everything material. So, i have an overload of shoes, bags, clothes, accessories, belts, jewellery, hair ties/clips/bands, gadgets, etc...

(5) I wear outrageously high heels to make myself feel better about my short legs. So, im vertically challenged and i've worn heels so often that when we must challenge our body during a "balancing" track for my body balance class...(ie go on our tippy-toes and stay tippy-toeing while squatting and then standing up-right again)...i do it effortlessly without wobbling like everyone else...heels basically f*** up the knees...i do body balance to undo the f***ing up...i think its working! =P

(6) I consciously put my clocks 10-15 mins faster than what the real time is, just so i can be on time.

(7) People who think im a lovely person have yet to meet the ugly bitch that resides in me.

(8 ) Why is it so hard for me to like my ex just a fraction of how much he likes me? He deserves someone so much better, if only he realised it...

(9) I crave for so much, but im a lazy bum.

(10) I've invested so much in me...monetary-wise...i think it was a bad investment...hahaha

(11) I appreciate what you have done for us, but i just dont appreciate you.

(12) Don't show me that you appreciate what i can do and/or what i can do for you...because i use that and take advantage of the situation and/or take advantage of you...and thats when u witness irony (7).

Compliments...

I thought i was receiving the best compliments this week!
I really really really did feel on top of the world...

I was told: "YOU ROCK PETALS!" and "YOU'RE THE BEST PETALS!" *hehehehe*

And then this morning while listening to 2dayFM, comedian Judith Lucy beat me in the compliments stakes...

A guy called Josh from Meadowbank, who was playing "Know Your Crap"...after he won the game, he was gushing to her: "...You're the best Judith! I'm a gay man and even I want to marry YOU!"

Is that a compliment, or what?! *ahahaha*

Renovating me!

I started an 8 week program to renovate me.

I have it all planned out.

Each day of the 8 weeks i have mapped out my exercise plan. The intensity in which i should be working at, when to do my cardio and when to start my resistance training. I have even planned when to do my detox, but thats pending on my doctor's thumbs up.

Why am i being a fanatical health freak, who is going to measure her every improvements? Because i have noticed the effects of "letting myself go!" (My clothes feels tight on...and i dont like it!) So, i am going to make a difference in the way i look and make myself feel better about the way i look. And in the end, i hopefully will look much better than i do now. But ino at the least i will be more toned.

Week 1 has already started.

Triplets of Belleville, Pete Murray, Lion King & Quidam!

I'm so excited...and i just can't hide it...im about to lose control and i think i like it! (I don't sing that as well as the Pointer Sisters...sorry!)

*^_^*

When i was watching the Oscars this year...I saw these 3 singers pop up singing a lil diddy for a cartoon called "The Triplets of Belleville" and it was such a jazzy number...it made me want to watch the cartoon and i was wondering when it would open in cinemas here. Its a French cartoon and is being shown now during the French Film Fest...and i got tix for this Saturday! *hehehe* I'm a lil happy camper...thats what i am!

And then on Saturday nite...i'll be catching the Pete Murray Concert after the movie...*woohoo*...im just about to burst with excitement!
=D

And then on Tuesday nite...i'm a going to watch Lion King! *woohoo again* I just can't wait...I just can't wait! hehehe

I have in my hot lil hands, front row seats to Quidam - by Cirque Du Soleil...can u believe it?...its the best seats in the Big Top (not incl. VIP seats)...A reserve, seats 1 and 2...altho its for the Matinee...thats fine...suits me better...cos i can go to Paddo Mkts and then go catch the show! *double woohoo*

Altho...this is all getting costly...but anyways...im happy and thats what counts!

*gush*

Its funny, uno...how often do we hope and wish that our parents would be proud of us and our achievements? and then one day you turn around and realise that you, urself are very proud of your parents achievements.

My parents came from Vietnam and it was a hard struggle to get where they are now. But i know that they would prefer the struggle that they have to go through here in Australia versus the continuous struggle that they would have gone through if they were still in Vietnam.

My mother in particular, is why im writing todays entry.

Its a strange thing...she will be 50 this year and yet she looks like an older sister to me. She is a grandmother of two and if she took her granddaughters out, ppl would mistaken them as her daughters. Today she was found out! By that, i mean she was hunted by an up and coming fashion house to make dresses for them. They called the fashion house that my mother has been working for to get the number of the contractor that my mother directly deals with. the contractor called my mother this morning, asking my mother whether or not she would be interested in making some dresses for them. They said they wanted "the woman that had sewn those dresses for Carla."

My mother has been working for Carla Zampatti for about a decade now, and she usually makes the formal/cocktail dresses for the designer. For a woman with no formal training, my mother is a natural talent. I wish i had her skills. I love fashion. If you see the dresses on the HUGE poster on York St (or Kent, i get confused with those 2 streets)...or maybe in the window of the Elizabeth St boutique...or maybe even in GB's City store (now Myers)...those beautiful dresses were made by my mother.

I looked at the sample of the dresses she is sewing for the new designers...i felt the fabric and ino why they looked for my mother...silk, silk chiffon, those type of materials are very difficult to sew...and to make those skinny straps, with all those details in the sewing...making the dresses without tearing into the fabric is a challenge if u dont know what to do.

I asked my mother: "Don't you feel good that they wanted YOU, mummy, to make these dresses?"
Her reply: "No, look at what i have to sew, its annoying!"

She was referring to the detail she had to put in the dresses...i think it pisses her off, that although she isnt working like in a sweat shop environment, she is still far from working in a glamourous position...and she feels very little appreciation from her "higher" employers...

I think it also peeves her that the designer of her current employer is a dopey, boobless woman. Her demands are somewhat "ridiculous"...she doesnt actually sew the clothes herself, but she thinks things can be done "her" way. Even though you dont have to be a dressmaker to realise that what she wants to do is terribly wrong and tedious.

But in homage to my sweet mother...im proud of her. In the fashion industry, i would take it as a compliment that another fashion house wants YOU to make their dresses, because they know that they need the right dressmaker to pay enough attention to the quality of detail in producing those beautiful dresses.

Congratulations Mummy!
*^_^*

Agree to disagree...but pls let me say this:

Independence means losing out in love (in my case):
It is working against me that im too self sufficient. That i have a fantastic network of family and friends. To the extent that i dont give a crap and i dont want a relationship with a guy. I have yet to meet a guy that excites me or makes me feel like i want him. (M thinks thats sad and worrying...but im just telling it how i see it as a reflection of myself). A new friend suggested that i play on both fields...but he doesnt get it, that i dont want to play - with anyone.

Bras:
I believe girls need more than one bra. How does a girl survive with only ONE bra??? It just doesnt work? I think the bare minimum would be at least 4 bras. Two white bras, one black, and a nude convertible strap bra.

Pacts:
I do believe that i already have a couple existing pacts with my ex's...that by the time were either 30y/o or 35y/o (cant remember which age corresponds to which ex) and still single that we'd marry eachother for the companionship. Its a dopey backup plan, and no i wasnt drunk...and i dont even know how it came about...but yeah, we verbally pinky swore over the phone...so im not even sure if that holds up as a promise!

Irrespective of that...the reason why i bring up the notion of pacts is that i received a really odd email on Friday after lunch from E. He sent a one line email reading:

"When you and i are 30 and still single, lets make a pact to have sex!"

I ask why and he informs me that L has made a pact with E's friend and so he is jealous that they have one. So now he wants a pact...and of course it has to be with his Cherry bomb! So, i modify the pact to:

"When you and i are 30 and still single, lets do something crazy like skydiving!"

E's response is:

"Thats even better, sex on the plane!"

I wasnt going to win. -_-"

Clubbing:
When i was 18 and started clubbing...i would see all these ppl...& wonder how old they were...and mostly they were my age. I feel old now when i go clubbing. Like last nite. I was surrounded by teeny boppers...its just weird if u go clubbing and all the ppl u say hi to are your friends lil bro or sis. I feel old, and i think i look old. Im not saying this because i dont like the fact that i look older. Contrary to that, i think with the couple of years of sleepless nites programming + partying like an insane woman has actually given a lot more character to my face. I look a lot less like a chubby cheeked squirrel, which has gotta be a good thing! My cheek bones are more prominent. I just look my age.

But yeah...ive hung up my dancing shoes...my knees are hurting...i think i will need to recuperate for like 2 months (or forever) before i think about going back.

Dance with me, dont rub against me:
If i was drunk, things might be different...but as uno i dont drink and so im not intoxicated - im aware of everything...so please if u wanna dance with me, id be more than delighted to accompany you...but by no means, get up close and personal and start bumpin' and grindin' with me front-front. If it was back-back, i can accomodate cos im gonna be dancing close to ppl like that without knowing...its a very small venue...

Trust:
My friend, building trust occurs at the start of a relationship. If you have not done anything to prove that u are untrustworthy or disloyal, and she still has trust issues from her previous relationship...then thats just it. She is the one with trust issues from her ex. Its shouldnt reflect on you as being a bad guy...she needs to resolve her issues.

Brother-Sister:
I met a guy who hated his sister. Like HATED. I was surprised at how much he hated her. He said that it was the normal brother-sister hate...M and I just looked at him and said...no we dont hate our brother like that! I admit, there are moments that i will loathe my brothers. Cos those baboons can do or say some really dumb things to their sis. But admittedly, i still love them. My brothers are my protecters and saviours when im in need. As lil kids of course we fought, but now were older we get along much better. And by no means do i ever hate them for longer than an hour or so. But my silent treatments last longer than the hour or so...hehehe...well, i gotta make them learn from their mistake! =P

Age:
My birthday is coming up...im suppose to feel older, but ive been thinking...

i feel younger.

is that weird? i mean of course when im surrounded by the teeny boppers at the club i feel old relative to them. but i dont feel like im on the verge of being 23...i feel like im going back a year...or two...i actually feel like im turning 20.

Up and Huff!

Do u wanna play hard ball?
I'll show you a thing or two!
=P

Im stubborn and when i set my sights on something i really want...warning: STAND OUT OF MY WAY!

*mwauwhauhahauha*

/evil grin

p.s: I gotta post my caricature from last nite...it rocks! Many thanks to Steve Panozzo!

Busy busy bumble bee!

Things i will be doing from tonite until the end of April:

18/03/04 ~ 2DayFM Pool Party
19/03/04 ~ Friend's Birthday
27/03/04 ~ Pete Murray Concert @ Metro
30/03/04 ~ The Lion King @ Capitol Theatre

03/04/04 ~ Sunset Boulevard @ Luna Park
04/04/04 ~ Australia's Wonderland (? Not 100% sure...talk about going has stopped).
09/04/04 or 10/04/04 ~ My Birthday Celebrations (? No guarantees...i think i might make my Birthday & Graduation rolled into one thing).
15/04/04 ~ Friend's Birthday
17/04/04 ~ Maroon 5 Concert @ Gaelic Club (? Maybe)
21/04/04 ~ Best Friend's Birthday & Michael Buble Concert @ Opera House
30/04/04 ~ My Graduation Day

I'm tired from typing this out...

Morale@Work?

Work Sucks!

How do you feel excited to go to work when you see the company fall apart?
My workmates have been made redundant.
I'm only kept here because of my liason with clients...they are use to me...im the friendly face/voice amongst the engineers...

I wish i was made redundant, so I can pursue other roles...and get the agency to work for me in finding a role, vesus me quitting and getting the agent to help me find another role...i dont think they would be happy with that.

I applied for a job and in the end it was between me and another person. I was not chosen...oh well...moving right along...

I dont mind staying here, if the company wasnt acquired and changes were made slowly...but the changes have been so rapid. Its only been slightly longer than a week since the acquisition was finalised. And yesterday, all the redundancies were complete. All the people who wanted to be handed a redundancy package were kept on, all the people who wasnt expecting it - got the chop.

The people who got the chop were all the really friendly and nice people who were supportive and really sweet to me. I'm gonna miss them sooo much. I feel so sad...the family that my company was, is now gone or in a different office location.

One workmate is swamped with work cos his manager is moving to the city to work with the company that acquired us, and his collegue was made redundant, so the area in which he works in is now empty and so he has a tonne of work to do...all in silence. The other people in the cubicles after the ones beside him, will be moving away too...so this whole area will be empty...i told him that i would walk by deliberately so that he could have human contact once in a while! And he knows when it is me, because of the way i walk and the click of my heels...he announces my entry...hehehehe..."and here comes *petals* to visit me..."

I dont feel motivated to do anything anymore...and ino that when im made permanent, i'll also be swamped too with work. The number of customers will quadriple and (in the grapevine) i'll be doing the reporting too - which mind you, use to be done by a person full time! But i wont be paid accordingly for it, cos the new company is only worried about its own back...not what will become of our lil company.

-_-"

Quirkytogether!

Quirkyalones = are not anti-love and certainly not anti-sex; they're merely "anti-dull relationships." Sasha Cagen.

The byline to this article reads: "Not content to settle for second best, more and more of us are ditching bad dates and embracing single status. We're 'quirkyalones', single and loving it."

I've always said that i have given up...cos i accept being single. I'm not sure if i "lurve" it, but im fine with how i spend my time. I'm actually finding it difficult sharing my time amongst various friends and more so, devoting some time to myself. Let alone sharing that little time with a "him".

But back to the article on Sasha Cagen and her book on being quirkyalone...The book is titled "Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics"...I want to read it. Finally, i have come across someone, some ideas, a philosophy that is parallel to mine.

"A quirkyalone is someone who prefers to wait for the right person to come along rather than dating indiscriminately. He or she has come to appreciate singledom as a natural state, a way to live a fulfilling life."

45% of Australians are single or divorced - a stat provided in the article, which to me just screams that singleness is a very normal thing...so we shouldn't be stigmatised for being so. Its not that I dont want to be in a relationship...im just not going to hold my breath until i turn blue...sorta thing, waiting for it to happen to me. Which, from this article, i am proud to say that many feel the same way. Life is too short to put on hold while you wait for someone. Enjoy it in the now and when a person of interest comes along...enjoy it even further!

I hate the fact that i get looked upon as a sad puppy who needs your pity for being single. I especially get it from relos, and the only ones that say to me "its okay, ur still young!" are my aunts who are in their late 30's and are single. They only offer comfort because im one of them. Its so cliched.

On Saturday nite, i went out with a friend, and i met her friend. Her friend later said to her that he thought it was funny that we were both single. If he had said that to me, i would have asked "And?" Not to antagonise him...but more to ask out of curiosity about his opinion and the perspective that i would not have been able to come up with on my own - as im not a guy. My And? was more like: "So, im interesting and fun to talk to...not completely an ugmo...does that mean i should be in a relationship? what do u mean?" It would have been more like that moment between Berger and Miranda, when he was telling her about what guys really meant when they "have an early meeting tomoro morning, and therefore cant have coffee." I wanted to be enlightened, to streamline and clear things up in my head.

For the fun of it, i went to Sasha Cagen's site and did the test on how quirkyalone i was...my results are as follows:

How quirkyalone are you?
Your score was 76. Somewhat quirkyalone (otherwise known as quirkytogether): You are probably part of a mysterious group of people, the quirkytogethers. You share many of our quirky qualities, but you manage to find yourself, on a regular basis, in a coupled situation. Interesting.

I don't quite like the term "quirkyalone" as much as i do "quirkytogether"...because i dont feel alone - im often too busy to feel it...and i have many other "quirkytogether" friends that i bum with...and because a person is single it != alone or even lonely. Well i dont think it has to...of course a person might feel it from time to time...what person doesnt feel it, ever? I mean you could be with someone, but while they are away on a business trip or something...ur going to miss them and feel alone while they are gone.

Anyways...i've re-written this to bits...and i've lost the real point to this blog, so im just gonna post this even though it may be incoherent and my apologies to anyone who is trying to make sense of all the various tangents i have gone writing on, and is now lost.

*bleh*

Will you "Marry Me"?

My friend was dumped on Monday, by the love of her life...because it was his calling...to become...a Priest!

She is fine, and has found inner strength to go on...but *ugh*...
her perspective: you love this guy so much and yet he loves God more...I think she is in either a deep denial or her feelings have really been resolved! I remember the first time the idea popped into her bf's head and she told me about it. They are both devout Catholics, but she just couldnt fathom that he would join the ministry - until his Priest mentioned it to him one day!

She said to me just then on the phone that she was okay with it, I mean how do you compete with God? and he feels its his calling. She asked him this morning if he would marry her? When she said that, i was like "OMG!?" Last attempt to keep him!?!?!?! WHY?

What she meant was "Will you marry me off to another guy...when the time comes?" *sigh* She said that they are still the best of friends, and she really wants him to be part of her Wedding Day, when it happens.

All i can say is that i would be hugely crushed.

My eventful week...

Friday nite - Moonlight cinemas
For me, it was awesome...Lost in Translation is a beautiful subtle movie...there is very little dialogue, albeit...but i think thats what has made it a sweet and simple movie. I was a bit thrown in one of the final scenes where Bob is whispering something in Charlotte's ear because I couldn't hear it (i dont know if i was suppose to) but that scene was lifted because I caught a falling/shooting star at the same moment.

Saturday nite
Its always the same deal with my high school friends. It was bound to happen AGAIN! I mean it happened in 1st year of uni when we went to the Pharmacy Ball - our cars got locked in a carpark...and it turned out to be a private carpark! -_-" So, saturday nite wasnt any different it was due to happen...its advertised on the noticeboards that the carpark would be closed at 1am...we get to the carpark 10mins to 1am and guess what? our cars are locked in once again...my friends spent about 20 mins looking for another entry way that might still be opened...whilst my best friend and i stood at the gate that we entered to park our cars, to wait for our other friends to pick us up in case we couldnt get the cars out. So as we stand around, i go look at the noticeboard and there is a little message in small print (as usual) to call a particular number for after hour help. So, we call and find out that the security guards are pissing in their pants laughing for something they caused...and find that we can get the car out...following their instructions on how to get into the carpark first off. bleh. -_-!

So, I got home at 2:30am...

I should stop making plans for myself...cos when i do, it gets foiled...i say to myself..."Lets stay at home tonite and watch that dvd/vcd..." and then when i say that to myself...someone calls about 30 mins after to ask "Hey! Are u busy tonite? Wanna go and do blah?" In which i reply with hesitation these days, cos staying in seems more enjoyable, especially after such said events like cars getting locked up in carparks! Or roaming the streets in search of a restaurant that will cater for 11 people on the nite...at 8:30pm...because the person who organised dinner decided Korean BBQ just wasnt the go for that nite. *yeah*

Good news: my sis-in-law gave birth to an adorable beauty of a baby girl! Born a month exactly before me, and same day as her father but 6 months ahead in the calendar!

Sunday
I chatted online on an US server cos my friend asked me to join...since i wasnt doing anything...i did...and it was fun...but not like the rush i use to get as a kid. When ur new to irc...its a hoot...but i havent actively chatted to anyone for like yonks...i mean anyone who is unknown. Occassionaly, im on irc with friends on our own channel...but thats about it.

Then i went to the gym...and when i went to stretch with my gym bud...and she told me something about a guy...i was literally rolling on the floor laughing...because i was already on the floor...i havent laughed like that for a long while...good for the abs.

Monday
Took the day off work...i woke up really nauseous and dizzy...i think its the antibiotics, because its really strong...my doctor told me i might have side effects...ugh!

My lil brother took the day off school...so there he is on one side of the living room coughing, while im on the other side with my head spinning out...my mother is in the middle watch Springer! Ha!

Tuesday
I thought i felt extremely better, so i went to work. Had i known that my Wednesday would be so bad...i wouldnt have went to work and then to the gym afterwards! doh! I noticed at the gym in couldnt really run...i felt queezy, so i decreased the speed and walked on an incline for a very long while compared to running for a long while. I got home and had some yogurt and then went to shower and straight to bed.

Wednesday
3am...the yogurt and the water i drank and whatever else i had during the day yesterday...all came up. Its a miracle that my body knew to get out of bed and sit up, grab my bin which was lined with a bag and up-chuck in that. It was a good 3 mins for me to get out of bed...surprisingly I didnt make a mess before getting up. I thought the worse was over after the up-chuck...but no...i started getting the chills and hot flushes after that. *fun* I had to call in sick again...i didnt want to have repercussions of my food poisoning escapade at work the other time about 2 months ago. Nor risk weirding out while driving to work on Homebush Bay Drive.

Thursday
Im at work again...hopefully the worst has passed...

According to my workmate, i look like ive lost weight...my face is sullen and my chubby cheeks have gone. Should i *woohoo* over this? I dont think so...

While crawling...

Okay this will be a short post...tomoros won't be, depending on whether or not tonite's moonlight cinema gets rained out or not!
=(

When in traffic...and ur moving like a snail on the road...its always good to have a nice view in ur rearview mirror!
;)

Although...ppl, i'm in need of a consensus on guessing if a guy has a gf? For instance if a guy has either a "cute" or "pretty" dangly thingy hanging on his rearview mirror...is it safe to assume he has a gf? Cos this guy had this really pretty PINK shiny thingy...i couldnt make out if it was a heart or not...but yeah...looked suss to me...hehehe

Anyways...have fun to all of you who are gonna go drinking tonite - if its on...and please (to my friends) dont get too hammered! I worry about u guys who dont remember things after drinking excessively - well, just when u drink excessively, full stop!
=(

What of tomoro?

I took a day off cos i had a specialist appointment...and after running other errands, i was walking back to my car...

I dont know, obviously time has changed, right? Girls as young as 8 y/o are menstruating these days, but when i was a girl...it was more like 12-13 y/o. Boys are growing faster too, the growth spurts for them starts earlier too...but what i want to know is whether or not their minds are developing earlier?

I see kids loitering around after school...they seem like the youngens in year 7 or 8...i wonder what they are thinking of, whether they see anything in their future, whether they aspire to anything? While i was in year 7...i was thinking about having fun as much as any kid, but i also did think about my future...i did consider what i would like to be when i grew up, after high school...whether i wanted to be a mother or a career woman. What type of career would be fun and interesting? What career would i really want to do and would be able to do?

I look at these kids and i worry for their future. To me, they look like they have given up. I know that education isnt free. My English teacher, Mr Paul Gilchrist, would always tell us, "i wish u guys were born 10 years earlier, there is too much talent here that might go to waste because there is a high price associated with education these days. i wish u guys were born when i was born, because tertiary education was free then."

I wonder if these kids think to themselves that they cant make it? Do they ever think: "i would like to be a when i grow up...but it will cost me an arm and a leg and my nose to pay for my way OR i'd rather work, i would never be able to get the marks to get into uni!" As a kid, i wanted to be a fashion designer, an interior designer, a real estate mogul, an artist, an architect, an accountant, a lawyer, a secret agent, a doctor - specifically a psychiatrist, a writer, a stoke broker, an architect again, a lawyer again, and then a neurologist - altho mum wanted me to become a gynecologist or an obstetrician. I always thought i had a chance, even though i knew it would cost money...i never thought i couldnt get into uni if i tried hard enough or that i would never find a way to my "dream career".

As a kid, i just thought that i had to work hard and that i will get there. Maybe it was my upbringing...my mother was always telling me to appreciate my education...not to do it for her, but for myself...cos in the end i would have to look after myself...the better the career, the more money, the more secure id be...if id lose my job, because of my education, i would have a better chance in finding another...what she drummed in, was more about the fact that i would have to be independent...so it didnt matter what i did, so long as i was happy with the job and i was able to look after myself then everything would be good for the future.

And her back-up plan was of course...since im a girl...i could always be a mother if i really sucked in the work force! *LoL* She seems so liberated at times and then she whips out something from the 1950's...hahaha...

So, these kids in the streets...still in their uniform...do they care about what will actually happen when they finish school? Are they just going to bum around for as long as they can? It doesnt look like they even want to try to do anything productive...I MAY BE WRONG! I dont deny that, but thats what i think when i look at them...its disheartening, because i think the least they could do for themselves is try...but there is this unwillingness or they are just busy having fun...loitering???

I dont know...but when i see kids like this and i look at my niece, i worry even further...and my sister in law is about to give birth to baby #2...which scares me even more...is it a downhill spiral for the kids of today who are our future leaders of tomoro? what will tomoro be like if they dont care whether or not there is a tomoro?

Love her...

There was this episode of Home Improvement...and this old man tells Tim Taylor about his wife who has passed away to illustrate his point.

He says to Tim: "My wife has these porcelain cats that she would line up on the windowsill to display. Its the most hideous thing i have ever seen. I hate them. So, i would take them off the windowsill and line them up in the cupboard. Everyday without fail after i have placed them in the cupboard, she would go to the cupboard and take them out and line them back on the windowsill."

Tim asks: "Now that she has passed away, where are the cats now? Did u get rid of them?"

The old man says: "They are on the windowsill, all lined up."

Tim says: "I thought u hated them?"

The old man replies: "But she loved them... You see, u dont have to understand women...u just have to love them."

Basically, even though the old man hated those cats, his wife loved them and he loved his wife more than enough to keep them on the windowsill even though she had passed away...its all out of love...*sigh*...

Who would of thought something insightful would come out of Home Improvement? Although, Wilson would always say something good and philosophical...floats totally right over Tim's head...but yeah...

=)

Like a wall flower...

I watched Mona Lisa Smiles on Friday nite. I really enjoyed it. Not because it was the best movie I had ever seen...it was just a quaint, insightful, good feeling sort of movie - that was really directed to females. It was funny and sincere, and it evoked emotions in me. Emotions that reside in the part of me that is pro-female, not quite feminist, pro-choice for both genders. It made me laugh and i felt good when i recognised Pollock when i saw it!

On Saturday, i caught Irreversible...my workmate had said that he wanted to watch it because it received rave reviews, so naturally i was really curious. After reading the reviews i was worried that i wouldnt be able to handle the details of such traumatic events. i think im left desensitised after watching it...all i can hear is the fire extinguisher at the point of contact...that mixture of the thuds or twangs...if u ever heard a fire extinguisher upon impact with, say a concrete floor, thats the sound i hear in my head...the final scene of that chapter of the movie is highly disturbing...surprisingly my pasta for lunch didnt pop back up.

I will never be the same again if i ever hear of a woman getting raped cos now i have a scene of it in my head. Yes, i actually sat there watching a rape scene in all its gore for the whole 9 or so minutes. A couple walked out after the girl was raped...i dont think the gf of the couple could take it anymore. Although, she walked out just when the movie was entering "happier" mode...There are 3 sections to the movie...the first 2 sections are disturbing, gut wrenching, utterly explicit, horrific stuf...while the 3rd section is more light and fluffy...

In a way, im glad the movie made its transition from yuck to omg to okay...if it had happened in the sequence of events as it should have happened and not backwards, i think i would be more traumatised...with the movie going backwards, certain things are kept from you. had you already been aware of those things...the story to me, would have been more upsetting.

I come home from watching Irreversible...and i go to my friends house and watch A Tale of Two Sisters...its suppose to be Korea's #1 horror flick...nope...did nothing for me...it confused me, but scare me? not in this life time and definitely not after Irreversible had shocked my system. There were errie parts, albeit...but i watched it without a flinch.

Last nite, i watched The Gift...i think the movie is suppose to be a horror flick...but it didnt turn out that way, or once again, i just dont feel anything. i watched it waiting for a scary part...but to no avail...i just sat there like i was watching some soap opera...

***

I'm actually continuing this post...i tend to make promises (blog-related) and then break them...ahahaha...

I watched Once Upon A Time in Mexico...and it was a really funny movie...obvious B-grade (or was it meant to look like it?), i couldn't stop cracking up...the gun in the guitar, the acrobatics, the knives that Salma manages to throw at the bad guys, the bombs, the whole militia outfit, the fact that a CIA agent is playing all these people along with an ex FBI...its just ridiculous. Characters are killed off left right and centre, for any reason u can think of...its hilarious...

Mind you i watched this on dvd...at home...so here i am in my pjs *rofl* with tears in my eyes...i would suggest anyone who wants a laugh to go watch this movie...or grab a copy of it...just for Johnny Depp...watch it! =P