My mum's friend...the one who showed us my "dream" ring...well she was battling on whether she should sell the ring or give it to one of her daughters...but since all 3 of her daughters want the 1 ring...she decided she would just sell it instead of keeping it for only one of them.
There were several people interested in the ring, because not only is the colour perfect, but there is very little inclusions.
She told my mother that if Mum wanted it, then we could have it...she'd prefer me to have the ring than anyone else...cos im such a good daughter and she thinks im cute!
^_^
Basically, to cut that morning affair short...i took the ring home with me that day!
When we got home from shopping...Mum saw a sign indicating that our neighbours house was open for inspection. She wanted to know how much a house on our street was selling for, so she said "Lets go and take a look..."
Little did i know that when we got there, she told the agent that i was the one buying...he took down my name and mobile number. He then asked "Is this your first home? Are you getting married?"
Since i had the ring on...i looked at Mum and turned back to him and said "Yes...i just got engaged!" He then extended some congratulations my way...
I dont know what made me say i was engaged...did i think he would give me a better deal!? O_o Having a diamond ring on "that" finger didnt help either...but the ring doesnt fit anywhere else.
Anyhow...after inspecting the place, he told me that the house was selling at $422,000! Mum was flabbergasted...its a clean and quaint place, very cosy...and quite frankly, if i wanted a house of my own just for myself, that house would be perfect. Its good for a couple, but if u add some kids to the equation...it just doesnt work...it would then become too small!
He gave me his business card with the amount written on the back...advising me that he will call and we can make another appointment after i consult my "fiancee"...*sigh*...i then realised that i would have to lie to him again when he would call in the next couple of days!
And sure enough, he called the day after...talk about eager!
I advised him that my fiancee wanted a bigger place!
Wrong move, as this opened a can of worms...the agent then asked how much was my "fiancee" interested in spending? They have many houses on offer, etc...was our finance cleared, because they could help with that too...*sigh*
I should have known better...not to lie...bugger!
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
The aftermath over the weekend...
Friday nite:
I walked in and i made eye contact...but my eyes were fuelled with contempt...what aggravated me even more was the fact that everyone was going to filter in at different times.
Quite frankly, we should have organised a later time so that everyone could turn up at the same time.
I told them already, i didnt want to repeat myself. So, if u turn up late, thats it...if we start talking and u miss out, im not going to say it again!
And i really told them what i thought. And i kept true to my words.
I told them that i was going to keep away from them and if they wanted the friendship back, then they would have to regain my trust, but in the mean time...they had better leave me be.
And i dont think they have any qualms with that, especially they are all ga-ga with their significant others...so in affect, it works out for everyone.
The two people who created the mess...really had nothing to say by the end of everything and they didnt say all that much throughout.
Saturday nite:
I went to the Meridian for Dinner and the old Chinese man was so funny...hehehe...
I met a friend of a friend...he started talking to me, i recalled where i first met him...but i didnt recall his name...i think he was slightly offended, since he remembered mine.
We actually spoke to eachother for a very long time...
According to my male friends...he really liked me, "cos guys just dont dedicate all their attention to one girl all nite...unless they like u..."
They guy was cute in the respect that when i started talking about how i think id fit in on a Trafalgar tour vs a Contiki tour...saying that i like doing more "mature" or "cultural" things...which the crowd on the Trafalgar tours would most probably appreciate just as much.
He started talking about art with me...even though we both knew that he was pulling alot of things that he was saying out of nowhere...
Leaving the party...my male friends were telling me that "i have it in the bag"..."he will definitely call me"...although, he never asked me for my number...our mutual friend had my number, but i dont know...i dont think he will call!
Its sweet that my male friends were looking out for me...and they think he is a nice bloke, and that i should go for the guy...and id give him a chance...but its Day 3...and he hasnt called...and u guys know what happened last time something like this happened!
If he doesnt call me tonite, im going with my gut instinct and just forget about him...it was a nice evening, and that may just be about it!
Sunday nite:
There is something about watching a beloved novel on tv...the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice is fabulous...i absolutely love it! I refuse to go out on Sunday nites because of it...its not just the 1 hour that i stay at home for...
I think i feel a lot of comfort and its my "me" time...to sit or lie on the couch on a Sunday evening watching it...getting all giddy about the tension between Mr Darcy and Miss Eliza Bennett...Colin Firth was made for that role...
Its funny, i turn down any invitation to go out on a Sunday nite because of it...not that i would admit that that is the reason...
I think its like one of those things...like the fact that i like watching cheesy Elvis movies...hehehehe...but by gosh, Elvis was cute when he was young! ;)
I walked in and i made eye contact...but my eyes were fuelled with contempt...what aggravated me even more was the fact that everyone was going to filter in at different times.
Quite frankly, we should have organised a later time so that everyone could turn up at the same time.
I told them already, i didnt want to repeat myself. So, if u turn up late, thats it...if we start talking and u miss out, im not going to say it again!
And i really told them what i thought. And i kept true to my words.
I told them that i was going to keep away from them and if they wanted the friendship back, then they would have to regain my trust, but in the mean time...they had better leave me be.
And i dont think they have any qualms with that, especially they are all ga-ga with their significant others...so in affect, it works out for everyone.
The two people who created the mess...really had nothing to say by the end of everything and they didnt say all that much throughout.
Saturday nite:
I went to the Meridian for Dinner and the old Chinese man was so funny...hehehe...
I met a friend of a friend...he started talking to me, i recalled where i first met him...but i didnt recall his name...i think he was slightly offended, since he remembered mine.
We actually spoke to eachother for a very long time...
According to my male friends...he really liked me, "cos guys just dont dedicate all their attention to one girl all nite...unless they like u..."
They guy was cute in the respect that when i started talking about how i think id fit in on a Trafalgar tour vs a Contiki tour...saying that i like doing more "mature" or "cultural" things...which the crowd on the Trafalgar tours would most probably appreciate just as much.
He started talking about art with me...even though we both knew that he was pulling alot of things that he was saying out of nowhere...
Leaving the party...my male friends were telling me that "i have it in the bag"..."he will definitely call me"...although, he never asked me for my number...our mutual friend had my number, but i dont know...i dont think he will call!
Its sweet that my male friends were looking out for me...and they think he is a nice bloke, and that i should go for the guy...and id give him a chance...but its Day 3...and he hasnt called...and u guys know what happened last time something like this happened!
If he doesnt call me tonite, im going with my gut instinct and just forget about him...it was a nice evening, and that may just be about it!
Sunday nite:
There is something about watching a beloved novel on tv...the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice is fabulous...i absolutely love it! I refuse to go out on Sunday nites because of it...its not just the 1 hour that i stay at home for...
I think i feel a lot of comfort and its my "me" time...to sit or lie on the couch on a Sunday evening watching it...getting all giddy about the tension between Mr Darcy and Miss Eliza Bennett...Colin Firth was made for that role...
Its funny, i turn down any invitation to go out on a Sunday nite because of it...not that i would admit that that is the reason...
I think its like one of those things...like the fact that i like watching cheesy Elvis movies...hehehehe...but by gosh, Elvis was cute when he was young! ;)
Friday, August 27, 2004
I am such a dag!
At work, we only listen to 106.5 FM because we support the network of other radio stations. Basically, the engineers i work with are paranoid in hearing any audible glitch from those radio stations, for fear that its a fault that they have to deal with.
I dont mind, i quite enjoy listening to the older songs, even though 106.5 plays a variety of songs. One of my most favourite songs of all times was just played. Its Crazy by Icehouse.
I think this is confirmation that im a complete DAG! Oh well...for those who are wonder which song im referring to, here are the words:
Crazy
IceHouse
(From The Album: Man of Colours)
I've got a pocket
full of holes
head in the clouds
the king of fools
you've got a ribbon of rainbows
the sun in your eyes
burning through
could be I'm happy and sad
could be I'm losing my head
over you
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
So if I'm dreaming
don't wake me tonight
if this is all wrong
I don't want it right
'cause you're the one sure thing
when I get lost in the game
once again
hey, I'm a lucky guy
without a reason and I
don't understand
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
Well, there must be some kind of mistake
to give your heart away
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
I've got a pocket
full of holes
head in the clouds
the king of fools
you've got a ribbon of rainbows
the sun in your eyes
burning through
could be I'm happy and sad
could be I'm losing my head
over you
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
Well, there must be some kind of mistake
to give your heart away
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
Well, there must be some kind of mistake
to give your heart away
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
well you've gotta be crazy baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be crazy, baby.....
I dont mind, i quite enjoy listening to the older songs, even though 106.5 plays a variety of songs. One of my most favourite songs of all times was just played. Its Crazy by Icehouse.
I think this is confirmation that im a complete DAG! Oh well...for those who are wonder which song im referring to, here are the words:
Crazy
IceHouse
(From The Album: Man of Colours)
I've got a pocket
full of holes
head in the clouds
the king of fools
you've got a ribbon of rainbows
the sun in your eyes
burning through
could be I'm happy and sad
could be I'm losing my head
over you
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
So if I'm dreaming
don't wake me tonight
if this is all wrong
I don't want it right
'cause you're the one sure thing
when I get lost in the game
once again
hey, I'm a lucky guy
without a reason and I
don't understand
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
Well, there must be some kind of mistake
to give your heart away
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
I've got a pocket
full of holes
head in the clouds
the king of fools
you've got a ribbon of rainbows
the sun in your eyes
burning through
could be I'm happy and sad
could be I'm losing my head
over you
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
Well, there must be some kind of mistake
to give your heart away
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
Well, there must be some kind of mistake
to give your heart away
yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
crazy
well you've gotta be crazy baby
to want a guy like me
yeah, you've gotta be crazy, baby.....
Thursday, August 26, 2004
A quickie of a sort!
I'd elaborate, as you know i would...but im flat out at work.
Basically, i am divoricing from all of my friends.
I, in no way, want to associate myself with a bunch of manipulative, conniving, insensitive, dishonorable, untrustworthy bunch of people.
The do not deserve my friendship!
Basically, i am divoricing from all of my friends.
I, in no way, want to associate myself with a bunch of manipulative, conniving, insensitive, dishonorable, untrustworthy bunch of people.
The do not deserve my friendship!
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Have i finished spitting the dummy yet?
Okay...a concerned friend read my blog and said i sounded "angsty"...so here is my attempt to sound "perky" for a bit...although, let me warn you...this may freak out every guy as it concerns the W word...for those a bit slow: WEDDING!
On a much more cheery note...on Saturday i took my mother out grocery shopping as usual...her friend showed us a ring (she sells diamonds wholesale) and it was gorgeous! it wasnt too big slightly bigger than a carat...an emerald cut, D colour...not sure about the inclusions but it looked pretty to me...it had two triangles on the side of the main rock...on a white gold band.
It fit my ring finger perfectly...and if i could choose an engagement ring, i could not have asked for a more ideal ring!
So, that is the ring covered...
My mother is currently sewing a beautiful black dress for the Spring/Summer 04 collection. i didnt get to see it before i came home after shopping with her. She suggested to me that it would actually be a lovely wedding gown - it even has its own train, while i drove her to get the groceries before hand.
When i got home, i tried the dress on...and uno what im going to say, right? As if u didnt have a clue! :P
The dress fit like a glove and in white instead of black, it would be my perfect wedding dress! The samples my mother makes only come in size 8...which made me feel even better about it. But everything about the dress was what i would have wanted for my wedding gown.
It was simple, but stylish...it basically flowed with my curves, accentuated my waist...showed off my back...and it was just perfect.
I'm like the biggest hypocrite on the face of this Earth!
But i think i can justify my feelings...
I have always said that i didnt want to marry...and i still dont want to marry someone...but i want to have a wedding!
I like being busy and i like the stress of organising things...i want to wear a pretty dress...and people have to tell me to my face that i look pretty in it (even if i dont! *LoL*)...I like the concept of having a big party with my family and friends...basically im a glutton for punishment!
ahahahhahaha
So, here i am...i have found my ring, and my dress...i need a would be groom!
*RofL*
=P
There was a guy...that M later revealed to me, that he was most probably chatting me up...which all happened on Saturday...so there is a potential guy! ;) My mother likes him too! ahahahhhahhaa
On a much more cheery note...on Saturday i took my mother out grocery shopping as usual...her friend showed us a ring (she sells diamonds wholesale) and it was gorgeous! it wasnt too big slightly bigger than a carat...an emerald cut, D colour...not sure about the inclusions but it looked pretty to me...it had two triangles on the side of the main rock...on a white gold band.
It fit my ring finger perfectly...and if i could choose an engagement ring, i could not have asked for a more ideal ring!
So, that is the ring covered...
My mother is currently sewing a beautiful black dress for the Spring/Summer 04 collection. i didnt get to see it before i came home after shopping with her. She suggested to me that it would actually be a lovely wedding gown - it even has its own train, while i drove her to get the groceries before hand.
When i got home, i tried the dress on...and uno what im going to say, right? As if u didnt have a clue! :P
The dress fit like a glove and in white instead of black, it would be my perfect wedding dress! The samples my mother makes only come in size 8...which made me feel even better about it. But everything about the dress was what i would have wanted for my wedding gown.
It was simple, but stylish...it basically flowed with my curves, accentuated my waist...showed off my back...and it was just perfect.
I'm like the biggest hypocrite on the face of this Earth!
But i think i can justify my feelings...
I have always said that i didnt want to marry...and i still dont want to marry someone...but i want to have a wedding!
I like being busy and i like the stress of organising things...i want to wear a pretty dress...and people have to tell me to my face that i look pretty in it (even if i dont! *LoL*)...I like the concept of having a big party with my family and friends...basically im a glutton for punishment!
ahahahhahaha
So, here i am...i have found my ring, and my dress...i need a would be groom!
*RofL*
=P
There was a guy...that M later revealed to me, that he was most probably chatting me up...which all happened on Saturday...so there is a potential guy! ;) My mother likes him too! ahahahhhahhaa
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
My burden to bare...
There has been a lot that has happened over the weekend...a lot of crying too!
I hate crying...im the typical person who cries and her eyes go all puffy like balloons...its the worse thing ever, cos it doesnt subside until a very long time later...sleeping it off doesnt work either, it makes it stay just as puffy!
I found out even more details about how he has been lying to EVERYONE!!! But that didnt make me feel like crying, if anything i was worried that if i saw him the next nite, cos he was going to Hoobastank with us, i might just walk up to him and punch him for breaking up my friendship with my best friend!
But i controlled myself...i pretended like i didnt know anything...talk about self control?
But i also found out other things...to do with my family...and i sorta knew that this would be coming my way...which has put a rift in the way things are at home...my aunt tried to console me, telling me its my obligation...telling me that my life is so much better now that we are in Australia...
Gee, u would think that i just came here off a boat by the way she was talking to me about it...even though i was actually born here.
I understand, and i appreciate what she was trying to say, but i think that there shouldnt be a burden in the first place, let along a burden for me to carry...although, her point was that it is - all for me! *heh* I'm, quite frankly, too ashamed to even mention what has now been bestowed upon my shoulders...but its there...i feel the weight of it...its quite substantial...
=(
For the first time in my adult life, i lost sleep over something...i woke up in a fever at about 3:30 in the morning and i couldnt get back to sleep...and i just laid there thinking...and crying and thinking and crying even more, to the extent that my body was shaking!
I felt like a child who had finally comprehended what demons they were about to face, but i also understood why there was no way out! Its not like, i can just "face" my demons...it will be an ongoing burden to deal with...and i wont really have any help in dealing with it!
So, basically...i have to carry the weight for as long as it will take...
I hate crying...im the typical person who cries and her eyes go all puffy like balloons...its the worse thing ever, cos it doesnt subside until a very long time later...sleeping it off doesnt work either, it makes it stay just as puffy!
I found out even more details about how he has been lying to EVERYONE!!! But that didnt make me feel like crying, if anything i was worried that if i saw him the next nite, cos he was going to Hoobastank with us, i might just walk up to him and punch him for breaking up my friendship with my best friend!
But i controlled myself...i pretended like i didnt know anything...talk about self control?
But i also found out other things...to do with my family...and i sorta knew that this would be coming my way...which has put a rift in the way things are at home...my aunt tried to console me, telling me its my obligation...telling me that my life is so much better now that we are in Australia...
Gee, u would think that i just came here off a boat by the way she was talking to me about it...even though i was actually born here.
I understand, and i appreciate what she was trying to say, but i think that there shouldnt be a burden in the first place, let along a burden for me to carry...although, her point was that it is - all for me! *heh* I'm, quite frankly, too ashamed to even mention what has now been bestowed upon my shoulders...but its there...i feel the weight of it...its quite substantial...
=(
For the first time in my adult life, i lost sleep over something...i woke up in a fever at about 3:30 in the morning and i couldnt get back to sleep...and i just laid there thinking...and crying and thinking and crying even more, to the extent that my body was shaking!
I felt like a child who had finally comprehended what demons they were about to face, but i also understood why there was no way out! Its not like, i can just "face" my demons...it will be an ongoing burden to deal with...and i wont really have any help in dealing with it!
So, basically...i have to carry the weight for as long as it will take...
Friday, August 20, 2004
Footnotes to petals yesterday...
(1) Sass & Bide, Lee, CK, Nobody, Billabong, Golf Punk ...
I am a horder of jeans...there was a time where buying jeans really annoyed me. They just didnt fit my body shape...my waistline was a size or two too small for the rest of it. Now, when one of my fave store goes on sale..."Loose Threads"...i go nuts and i pick up a pair of jeans!
X_x
< in the process of modifying my blog, i seemed to have lost a paragraph from this first part >
Basically it went like this...
i have over 15 pairs of jeans and there are only 7 days in a week, and of those 7 days...i only can really wear them on 3 out of the 7 days. Out of the 15 pairs of jeans i do have, i only wear about 5 of them...thats me being honest here.
So, why should i even concede that it is okay to buy more?! Its illogical, no matter how much of a bargain buy it will be!
*STOP it you SHOPAHOLIC*
(2) I am divorcing my friends...at least a separation for a long time!
I have discovered that i give people the benefit of the doubt, and naively, i think that most people are really good people.
*and then they prove me wrong*
So, i get really disappointed when they are not like me. I am loyal to my friends. I believe in honouring what i say. I believe in considering other's feelings before making rash decisions if it involves them.
After all the things that i have found out about everyone, i am ashamed to call those people friends.
(3) An example of my Dad and i having an arguement + Mum's intervention (ad lib version):
He comes home complaining that he couldnt call the house.
Mum says lil brother was on the net. She asked: "Why didnt u call his mobile?"
He said: "I kept getting a voice message with our daughter's voice on it."
* i looked at him, thinking u called the wrong number then*
I said: "Are u calling his old number? He gave that SIM back to me a very long time ago."
He replied: "No, i called this number - 04xx xxx xxx."
*My brother looks at Dad's mobile, checking his mobile number*
My brother says to Dad: "Its the wrong number Dad, these two digits are wrong."
Dad is still defensive: "How come ur sister's voice is on the message?"
*i looked at him thinking...ur confusing my voice with another girls voice, who that number happens to belongs to*
I said to Dad: "Maybe that mobile number belongs to a girl...did she actually say 'Hi, this is petals. Please leave a message and i will call you back.' ?
Dad being adamant: *Pause from him thinking, did the girl say "petals"?*
"No, but i'm very good at recognising people's voices. I can pick up on anyone's voice when they call me, without looking at who called. And i know my own daughter's voice!"
*i think i rolled my eyes...like, u obviously heard wrong!*
Me being adamant: "Err...but i dont have that mobile number, and neither does anyone else in this family...why would my voice be on someone else's voicemail anyway? Maybe there are a lot of girls who sound the same as me? Maybe by coincidence, the girl who owns that mobile, does sound like me! It is impossible to have actually been me! I think ur confusing my voice with someone elses."
*grr*
Mum's intervention: I was really peeved at this point that he was arguing with me over someone else's voicemail, in which that other girl sounded like me. But Mum said something making it out to be "my fault" for pursuing an argument with my Dad...although it was him, chucking a hissy fit being adamant that her voice was mine!
Like, OMG!!! Its physically impossible for me to have recorded my voice on that mobile number because i dont have that SIM to record it on!!! "
I am a horder of jeans...there was a time where buying jeans really annoyed me. They just didnt fit my body shape...my waistline was a size or two too small for the rest of it. Now, when one of my fave store goes on sale..."Loose Threads"...i go nuts and i pick up a pair of jeans!
X_x
< in the process of modifying my blog, i seemed to have lost a paragraph from this first part >
Basically it went like this...
i have over 15 pairs of jeans and there are only 7 days in a week, and of those 7 days...i only can really wear them on 3 out of the 7 days. Out of the 15 pairs of jeans i do have, i only wear about 5 of them...thats me being honest here.
So, why should i even concede that it is okay to buy more?! Its illogical, no matter how much of a bargain buy it will be!
*STOP it you SHOPAHOLIC*
(2) I am divorcing my friends...at least a separation for a long time!
I have discovered that i give people the benefit of the doubt, and naively, i think that most people are really good people.
*and then they prove me wrong*
So, i get really disappointed when they are not like me. I am loyal to my friends. I believe in honouring what i say. I believe in considering other's feelings before making rash decisions if it involves them.
After all the things that i have found out about everyone, i am ashamed to call those people friends.
(3) An example of my Dad and i having an arguement + Mum's intervention (ad lib version):
He comes home complaining that he couldnt call the house.
Mum says lil brother was on the net. She asked: "Why didnt u call his mobile?"
He said: "I kept getting a voice message with our daughter's voice on it."
* i looked at him, thinking u called the wrong number then*
I said: "Are u calling his old number? He gave that SIM back to me a very long time ago."
He replied: "No, i called this number - 04xx xxx xxx."
*My brother looks at Dad's mobile, checking his mobile number*
My brother says to Dad: "Its the wrong number Dad, these two digits are wrong."
Dad is still defensive: "How come ur sister's voice is on the message?"
*i looked at him thinking...ur confusing my voice with another girls voice, who that number happens to belongs to*
I said to Dad: "Maybe that mobile number belongs to a girl...did she actually say 'Hi, this is petals. Please leave a message and i will call you back.' ?
Dad being adamant: *Pause from him thinking, did the girl say "petals"?*
"No, but i'm very good at recognising people's voices. I can pick up on anyone's voice when they call me, without looking at who called. And i know my own daughter's voice!"
*i think i rolled my eyes...like, u obviously heard wrong!*
Me being adamant: "Err...but i dont have that mobile number, and neither does anyone else in this family...why would my voice be on someone else's voicemail anyway? Maybe there are a lot of girls who sound the same as me? Maybe by coincidence, the girl who owns that mobile, does sound like me! It is impossible to have actually been me! I think ur confusing my voice with someone elses."
*grr*
Mum's intervention: I was really peeved at this point that he was arguing with me over someone else's voicemail, in which that other girl sounded like me. But Mum said something making it out to be "my fault" for pursuing an argument with my Dad...although it was him, chucking a hissy fit being adamant that her voice was mine!
Like, OMG!!! Its physically impossible for me to have recorded my voice on that mobile number because i dont have that SIM to record it on!!! "
Thursday, August 19, 2004
When a story unfolds...
I'm currently feeling quite torn...
In attempt to help my friend (that got hurt by the new couple), i decided i should speak to a close male friend of our's (neutral party) to know how he is currently feeling...whether he wants to be left alone, or if he is in a talking mood???
I wondered if it was okay, for me...a girl, to approach him and talk to him as i would with my brothers when they break up with their gfs, uno?
I mean, its easier for me to console my girlfriends in these situations...i would just rock up to their place with a truckload of icecream or cheesecake or chocolate...maybe all three...some DVDs and we would all talk...we would cry...we would laugh at how stoopid we were being...and in the end, she would feel that itsy bitsy tiny bit better!
But for guys, you cant do much if the person who is hurting doesnt drink much alcohol, right? It seems like the best way to console a guy, is to take them out and drown their sorrows with as much alcohol it will take to make them go blind!
I'm learning about how he found out that the girl he liked was stolen by his mate...how the mate justified his act in stealing the girl from him...who everyone thinks is in the wrong...how the guy is really really cut up about the whole thing!
I'm worried that i cant say or do much...he probably wants to stay away from all of us...i dont blame him...poor guy!
In situations like these, i feel for the underdog...but the situation is complicated cos one of the member of the party causing the pain is my best friend!
*ugh*
In attempt to help my friend (that got hurt by the new couple), i decided i should speak to a close male friend of our's (neutral party) to know how he is currently feeling...whether he wants to be left alone, or if he is in a talking mood???
I wondered if it was okay, for me...a girl, to approach him and talk to him as i would with my brothers when they break up with their gfs, uno?
I mean, its easier for me to console my girlfriends in these situations...i would just rock up to their place with a truckload of icecream or cheesecake or chocolate...maybe all three...some DVDs and we would all talk...we would cry...we would laugh at how stoopid we were being...and in the end, she would feel that itsy bitsy tiny bit better!
But for guys, you cant do much if the person who is hurting doesnt drink much alcohol, right? It seems like the best way to console a guy, is to take them out and drown their sorrows with as much alcohol it will take to make them go blind!
I'm learning about how he found out that the girl he liked was stolen by his mate...how the mate justified his act in stealing the girl from him...who everyone thinks is in the wrong...how the guy is really really cut up about the whole thing!
I'm worried that i cant say or do much...he probably wants to stay away from all of us...i dont blame him...poor guy!
In situations like these, i feel for the underdog...but the situation is complicated cos one of the member of the party causing the pain is my best friend!
*ugh*
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Additional notes...
Genetics: I've been thinking...in the weekend newspaper, there was a photograph of 2 supermodels and their son. It got me thinking.
That child, by no means will grow up ugly! The only way that child could be "ugly" is by having a terrible personality...
So, my curious mind started working...in terms of looks, u are genetically predisposed to look like ur parents cos its in the genes. What about ur personality?
Can ur personality be predisposed???
Can you, say, blame ur parents for ur bad temper or for other traits like that?
My mother, when i was younger blamed my stubborness on my father. In chinese, she would say that it was in my "nature" (best translation i can think of). She said that my nature was like my father...which is why when i got angry with him, and he was angry at me...we would have silent treatments that would go on forever! The only way we would end the silent treatment would be from my mother's intervention...making me feel as though i was an ungrateful child "yaddayaddayadda" and she would get me to apologise to him, even if my father's was at fault.
Anyways...in a scientific perspective, can i blame all the personality flaws on my parents? I mean, i need someone to blame them on! If i can blame my stumpy frame on my parents, am i able to blame my loud manner on my mother and my careless manner on my father? hehehehe
White Chicks: I dont often watch movies like this...but since i was in dire need of a laugh...i went and i found myself laughing so much! I mean the make up wasnt as good as Nutty Professor...but its still a funny crack up type of movie!
The weather was pretty horrible last nite, so it was good to go to the cinemas and hide in the darkness laughing to the silly antics.
Toronto: M asked me if i would be interested in going with her and her mother. i was contemplating throwing my Europe trip in for a White Christmas in Toronto instead...and if i do go o/s i think i will go Toronto...
What made me choose Toronto?
Well, i got my belated Graduation present from a friend...it was a Michael Buble DVD. I was watching it on Sunday arvo...and it hit me then!
Buble is from Canada!!!
Enough said...Toronto wins with both hands down!
^_^
hehehehhee
So, if i do go o/s...it will be with M heading to Toronto!
That child, by no means will grow up ugly! The only way that child could be "ugly" is by having a terrible personality...
So, my curious mind started working...in terms of looks, u are genetically predisposed to look like ur parents cos its in the genes. What about ur personality?
Can ur personality be predisposed???
Can you, say, blame ur parents for ur bad temper or for other traits like that?
My mother, when i was younger blamed my stubborness on my father. In chinese, she would say that it was in my "nature" (best translation i can think of). She said that my nature was like my father...which is why when i got angry with him, and he was angry at me...we would have silent treatments that would go on forever! The only way we would end the silent treatment would be from my mother's intervention...making me feel as though i was an ungrateful child "yaddayaddayadda" and she would get me to apologise to him, even if my father's was at fault.
Anyways...in a scientific perspective, can i blame all the personality flaws on my parents? I mean, i need someone to blame them on! If i can blame my stumpy frame on my parents, am i able to blame my loud manner on my mother and my careless manner on my father? hehehehe
White Chicks: I dont often watch movies like this...but since i was in dire need of a laugh...i went and i found myself laughing so much! I mean the make up wasnt as good as Nutty Professor...but its still a funny crack up type of movie!
The weather was pretty horrible last nite, so it was good to go to the cinemas and hide in the darkness laughing to the silly antics.
Toronto: M asked me if i would be interested in going with her and her mother. i was contemplating throwing my Europe trip in for a White Christmas in Toronto instead...and if i do go o/s i think i will go Toronto...
What made me choose Toronto?
Well, i got my belated Graduation present from a friend...it was a Michael Buble DVD. I was watching it on Sunday arvo...and it hit me then!
Buble is from Canada!!!
Enough said...Toronto wins with both hands down!
^_^
hehehehhee
So, if i do go o/s...it will be with M heading to Toronto!
Moments that pass you by...
I tend to have an idea as to what i would like to write about on this blog...usually the nite before an epiphany hits me...but by the time i get to work...if im really busy...i cant be bothered...so the moment passed.
You cant go back to the moment unless the same thing happens or it dawns on you even stronger.
Today, im backlogging some ideas. Im going against the grain...but some of these things were quite poignant at the time...so im going to do something that is out of the norm!
Dreaming: I'm one of those people who sleep easy. Once my head hits my pillow, give me about 5 minutes or so and i will fall asleep...I'm also one of those people who do not dream when they sleep...or they just dont recall any of their dreams when they wake.
On Monday nite I actually had a few dreams and i recalled it in the morning. I think it was the rain and wind outside that disturbed me.
One of the dreams was so vivid.
I was in India on a safari like trip. There were 3 people from work...Kerry, Anthony and Glen...a newlywed couple from India...and a wacky tour guide. We trekked through a jungle to get to this scary amuzement park in the middle of the jungle. I nearly died a few times just getting there...
When we entered the amuzement park we headed to a "water ride" only this water ride was on sheets of tin roofing in a river filled with leeches, piranhas, barracudas, every form of water snakes...*yuck*
I'm not sure why i was dreaming such a dream...
All involved got a sheet of tin roofing each as a "seat" for their "water ride" and we had to hash each sheet together and the wacky guide was steering us through the river...if the sheets that we hashed together separated, the person on that sheet had to somehow re-join the sheet to the rest of the groups...
O_o
Yeah...it was quite weird...i woke up, although wanting to understand and know more, by the sound of my alarm.
Circle of friends: The last couple to get together from my group of friends...well they had a "coming out" sort of situation...the bf totally crushed his friend, by bringing the girl that the friend still likes to a dinner party that he was at! I think he introduced the girl to everyone else as his girlfriend...obviously loud enough for the friend to hear...
The girl told that friend that she wasnt interested in having a relationship with anyone...it wasnt about him...but her demonstration by going with her bf, basically says otherwise! It screams in the friend's face that HE wasnt the one she wanted to be with and the moment the guy who she wanted to be with turned up...she was ready to be his girlfriend!
*ugh*
Everyone is coming up to me, cos she told everyone that she was talking to me about it...everyone is pissy with me cos they think i urged her on to go out with her bf. BUT i didnt tell her to do anything...
In terms of situation like these...im often on the fence...i dont want to sound like someone's mother! Altho, i sorta did...i asked her "What about "him"??? Dont you think its a bit soon?...the guy is going to be hurt...poor guy..."
Her response to that was that she already told him that she wasnt interested...i then reiterated: "But...he still likes you, and now ur going to go out with one of his close friends??? O_O"
She continued talking...i was just silent...she then asked why i wasnt talking...i told her i was shocked...and i was just reminding myself to breathe! This was getting crazy and out of hand...
In less than a week, the two people involved became a couple! Like what the???
I told a friend who was asking me about it the whole deal...i informed her that she was more aware of what was going on than i was...as i didnt even know they were a "couple"...that everyone knew about it before i did!
=P
She said that everyone is disappointed in the two of them...that they have very little regard for the friend that is currently hurting over the betrayal...
>_<>TOO much affection publicly...
She told me how disgusted she was with the couples...
One nite, when she was being dropped off by one of them after a nite out...the gf was dropping the bf off and my friend was in the back seat of the car...they kissed good bye and apparently, it utterly turned off my friend...she felt it was soooo WRONG! to pash in front of a friend...
I laughed at her, cos she was literally shaking from the disturbance! The visual was still embedded in her mind! I admit, if i witnessed that, i would have gagged too!
Remember, these guys are like brothers and sisters to me...so in my head, its still all too wrong!
Olympics: I wasnt really into it from the countdown to the opening ceremony(i actually missed it)...i was adamant about not watching either...i was peeved that i couldnt watch my normal shows...if anything it was disturbing my life! (i'm sooking!)
I found myself on the weekend, though, cheering whilst watching the heats for our swimmers. I also found myself cheering...for Australia's best "Thorpie" and for all of the women swimmers...I started screaming as though i was there, watching it live!
I think i need to get out more...ahahaha
You cant go back to the moment unless the same thing happens or it dawns on you even stronger.
Today, im backlogging some ideas. Im going against the grain...but some of these things were quite poignant at the time...so im going to do something that is out of the norm!
Dreaming: I'm one of those people who sleep easy. Once my head hits my pillow, give me about 5 minutes or so and i will fall asleep...I'm also one of those people who do not dream when they sleep...or they just dont recall any of their dreams when they wake.
On Monday nite I actually had a few dreams and i recalled it in the morning. I think it was the rain and wind outside that disturbed me.
One of the dreams was so vivid.
I was in India on a safari like trip. There were 3 people from work...Kerry, Anthony and Glen...a newlywed couple from India...and a wacky tour guide. We trekked through a jungle to get to this scary amuzement park in the middle of the jungle. I nearly died a few times just getting there...
When we entered the amuzement park we headed to a "water ride" only this water ride was on sheets of tin roofing in a river filled with leeches, piranhas, barracudas, every form of water snakes...*yuck*
I'm not sure why i was dreaming such a dream...
All involved got a sheet of tin roofing each as a "seat" for their "water ride" and we had to hash each sheet together and the wacky guide was steering us through the river...if the sheets that we hashed together separated, the person on that sheet had to somehow re-join the sheet to the rest of the groups...
O_o
Yeah...it was quite weird...i woke up, although wanting to understand and know more, by the sound of my alarm.
Circle of friends: The last couple to get together from my group of friends...well they had a "coming out" sort of situation...the bf totally crushed his friend, by bringing the girl that the friend still likes to a dinner party that he was at! I think he introduced the girl to everyone else as his girlfriend...obviously loud enough for the friend to hear...
The girl told that friend that she wasnt interested in having a relationship with anyone...it wasnt about him...but her demonstration by going with her bf, basically says otherwise! It screams in the friend's face that HE wasnt the one she wanted to be with and the moment the guy who she wanted to be with turned up...she was ready to be his girlfriend!
*ugh*
Everyone is coming up to me, cos she told everyone that she was talking to me about it...everyone is pissy with me cos they think i urged her on to go out with her bf. BUT i didnt tell her to do anything...
In terms of situation like these...im often on the fence...i dont want to sound like someone's mother! Altho, i sorta did...i asked her "What about "him"??? Dont you think its a bit soon?...the guy is going to be hurt...poor guy..."
Her response to that was that she already told him that she wasnt interested...i then reiterated: "But...he still likes you, and now ur going to go out with one of his close friends??? O_O"
She continued talking...i was just silent...she then asked why i wasnt talking...i told her i was shocked...and i was just reminding myself to breathe! This was getting crazy and out of hand...
In less than a week, the two people involved became a couple! Like what the???
I told a friend who was asking me about it the whole deal...i informed her that she was more aware of what was going on than i was...as i didnt even know they were a "couple"...that everyone knew about it before i did!
=P
She said that everyone is disappointed in the two of them...that they have very little regard for the friend that is currently hurting over the betrayal...
>_<>TOO much affection publicly...
She told me how disgusted she was with the couples...
One nite, when she was being dropped off by one of them after a nite out...the gf was dropping the bf off and my friend was in the back seat of the car...they kissed good bye and apparently, it utterly turned off my friend...she felt it was soooo WRONG! to pash in front of a friend...
I laughed at her, cos she was literally shaking from the disturbance! The visual was still embedded in her mind! I admit, if i witnessed that, i would have gagged too!
Remember, these guys are like brothers and sisters to me...so in my head, its still all too wrong!
Olympics: I wasnt really into it from the countdown to the opening ceremony(i actually missed it)...i was adamant about not watching either...i was peeved that i couldnt watch my normal shows...if anything it was disturbing my life! (i'm sooking!)
I found myself on the weekend, though, cheering whilst watching the heats for our swimmers. I also found myself cheering...for Australia's best "Thorpie" and for all of the women swimmers...I started screaming as though i was there, watching it live!
I think i need to get out more...ahahaha
Monday, August 16, 2004
Aussie women are boring!
I dont think Australian women are boring!
And there i was, having my lunch and this guy is telling his friend what he thinks. According to him...Australian women are "frankly, quite boring...i get along with women from overseas far better."
This coming from a short, dark haired little man, who was initially talking about "how hard his personal trainer was working him this morning"...and when he went to his son's friend's 3rd birthday he was "surrounded by all these mothers".
His friend responded to the "Aussie women are boring" remark with "yeah, i think they are quite bland".
As far as im concerned and in terms of conversation...most women switch off when they are talking to someone that they arent interested in (i think that is the same for both genders in general)...and in some ways i think its a reflection of ur boring self, if the conversation is not flowing or fun & interesting! Conversations are two-way, if its boring...it could be you and not them.
There are some boring people out there...but im pretty sure there are heaps of interesting people also, both men and women! Its just a matter of what you find interesting. Just because it doesnt "interest" you...that doesnt mean that the other person is less interesting!
Thankfully, Cute Salad guy came by and started talking to me...so i stopped eavesdropping on that guys conversation about how boring us Australian women were!
=P
And there i was, having my lunch and this guy is telling his friend what he thinks. According to him...Australian women are "frankly, quite boring...i get along with women from overseas far better."
This coming from a short, dark haired little man, who was initially talking about "how hard his personal trainer was working him this morning"...and when he went to his son's friend's 3rd birthday he was "surrounded by all these mothers".
His friend responded to the "Aussie women are boring" remark with "yeah, i think they are quite bland".
As far as im concerned and in terms of conversation...most women switch off when they are talking to someone that they arent interested in (i think that is the same for both genders in general)...and in some ways i think its a reflection of ur boring self, if the conversation is not flowing or fun & interesting! Conversations are two-way, if its boring...it could be you and not them.
There are some boring people out there...but im pretty sure there are heaps of interesting people also, both men and women! Its just a matter of what you find interesting. Just because it doesnt "interest" you...that doesnt mean that the other person is less interesting!
Thankfully, Cute Salad guy came by and started talking to me...so i stopped eavesdropping on that guys conversation about how boring us Australian women were!
=P
Under le Grand Chapiteau...
I watched the matinee session of Cirque du Soleil's - Quidam on Saturday.
If you were expecting clowns in the old sense of big red nose, big fuzzy wigs, huge sloppy shoes...then u will be disappointed.
I wasn't anticipating much, because i didnt want to be disappointed, especially when i had seats 1 & 2 along the stage in the front row. But they didnt let me down. For the amount i paid...it was well worth it! For all the death defying acts these talented people displayed, i would applaud them to show appreciation 10 times over.
A must see, are the 4 Chinese girls who do tremendous acts with a diablo each, somersaulting here and there and never dropping the diablo. They are all so cute, smiling and sooo talented! And keep an eye out for all the acrobatics done in the air without harnesses...my neck got a bit sore...bit i wouldnt have wanted to sit anywhere else...(except mayb in the middle of the VIP section in the front row, which was about 10-15 seats to my right.)
;P
Without giving away too much for all the people who will be going...be careful with sitting in the front row or the second row...as the two funniest acts were interactive! It was brilliant, the participation from the audience was hilarious! But im so relieved that i wasnt picked from the crowd...(the spotlight hovered around my friend and i, but it was for the guy behind us!) hehehehe
There was a story underlying the whole show...but its quite mysterious to me at first...and there were some characters in which i didnt understand why they were there...maybe just for decoration or distraction, but it wasnt a magic show...so who knows!
By the way, all the acrobats have makeup on, but only one guy really looked scary...and he is the weirdo boxing glove dude that you might have seen on posters.
If you can get ur hands on good tix, i do recommend watching it!
^_^
If you were expecting clowns in the old sense of big red nose, big fuzzy wigs, huge sloppy shoes...then u will be disappointed.
I wasn't anticipating much, because i didnt want to be disappointed, especially when i had seats 1 & 2 along the stage in the front row. But they didnt let me down. For the amount i paid...it was well worth it! For all the death defying acts these talented people displayed, i would applaud them to show appreciation 10 times over.
A must see, are the 4 Chinese girls who do tremendous acts with a diablo each, somersaulting here and there and never dropping the diablo. They are all so cute, smiling and sooo talented! And keep an eye out for all the acrobatics done in the air without harnesses...my neck got a bit sore...bit i wouldnt have wanted to sit anywhere else...(except mayb in the middle of the VIP section in the front row, which was about 10-15 seats to my right.)
;P
Without giving away too much for all the people who will be going...be careful with sitting in the front row or the second row...as the two funniest acts were interactive! It was brilliant, the participation from the audience was hilarious! But im so relieved that i wasnt picked from the crowd...(the spotlight hovered around my friend and i, but it was for the guy behind us!) hehehehe
There was a story underlying the whole show...but its quite mysterious to me at first...and there were some characters in which i didnt understand why they were there...maybe just for decoration or distraction, but it wasnt a magic show...so who knows!
By the way, all the acrobats have makeup on, but only one guy really looked scary...and he is the weirdo boxing glove dude that you might have seen on posters.
If you can get ur hands on good tix, i do recommend watching it!
^_^
Friday, August 13, 2004
Sex, lies and "the" videotape...
I miss him soo much! Its been way over a month since he went to Europe...and i didnt think i would miss him this much, but i do. Since he went o/s, i've stopped laughing...how weird is that?
He started missing us a few weeks back...i just realised how much he affected our lives, and more importantly...my life.
I miss the times we would drive around aimlessly filming the seedy parts of town for "footage" to use on our movie...L would be high on her triple shot of a double shot of coffee...E would be giggling non-stop from the iced chocolate and i would just be rolling around laughing because of the atmosphere!
He gave me a video before he left, filled with all the scenes i was in as "Cherry" and footage from my Grad/Birthday party and the stint from the bbq at Glebe...
I havent watched it, in fear that my mother would walk into the living room while i was doing something ridiculous in the movie and then banning me from ever hanging out with E and L! She wasnt impressed by the fact that E was honking his horn one nite he picked me up for a friend's birthday party. It wasnt just a simple *toot toot* it was a constant *toooooot toooooot* x 10 times or so, while he raced up and down my street cos he couldnt remember my house number!
*LoL*
I miss the INSANITY!
I miss him throwing silly remarks my way about his version of our agreement...to join the milehigh club when we turn 30...before we prepare to jump out of a plane! (I just said we would go skydiving...he added that whole milehigh club thing...
Hurry up and come back to Sydney E!
=P
He started missing us a few weeks back...i just realised how much he affected our lives, and more importantly...my life.
I miss the times we would drive around aimlessly filming the seedy parts of town for "footage" to use on our movie...L would be high on her triple shot of a double shot of coffee...E would be giggling non-stop from the iced chocolate and i would just be rolling around laughing because of the atmosphere!
He gave me a video before he left, filled with all the scenes i was in as "Cherry" and footage from my Grad/Birthday party and the stint from the bbq at Glebe...
I havent watched it, in fear that my mother would walk into the living room while i was doing something ridiculous in the movie and then banning me from ever hanging out with E and L! She wasnt impressed by the fact that E was honking his horn one nite he picked me up for a friend's birthday party. It wasnt just a simple *toot toot* it was a constant *toooooot toooooot* x 10 times or so, while he raced up and down my street cos he couldnt remember my house number!
*LoL*
I miss the INSANITY!
I miss him throwing silly remarks my way about his version of our agreement...to join the milehigh club when we turn 30...before we prepare to jump out of a plane! (I just said we would go skydiving...he added that whole milehigh club thing...
Hurry up and come back to Sydney E!
=P
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
Admitting defeat...
I was on a roll...i have been writing on this blog for everyday of the working week, since i made a conscious decision to...
I said i would write something relevant to me on each and everyday of the working week...
But i'm flat chat at work...so this will be brief!
I am defeated...this is an irrelevant contribution to my blog.
Hopefully, tomoro i will have time to write about something on my mind.
=(
I said i would write something relevant to me on each and everyday of the working week...
But i'm flat chat at work...so this will be brief!
I am defeated...this is an irrelevant contribution to my blog.
Hopefully, tomoro i will have time to write about something on my mind.
=(
Tuesday, August 10, 2004
2 out of 3 isn't so bad...
During lunch yesterday, i called and voted for Chanel, Ngaiire, & Courtney. I was thrilled to see all 3 were in the top 4, but i was saddened by the fact that Ngaiire didn't make the top 3. As most may think at this point...she will be back as a wildcard...and in that instance i will vote for her again!
=)
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy - Wedding Episode was so cool. I have always pictured as a girl, that i would like a garden wedding...and the episode was quite inspirational...i love the decor and the gift for the guests. It made me feel like i should be a wedding planner because i just wanted to go out there and do all the planning and decorating! ahahahhaaha...im a glutton for punishment!
You know how baby Montana, from Melbourne was kidnapped. I heard from her mother on the radio last nite driving home, that she didnt want Montana to ever know about the kidnapping....but then this morning i heard on the same radio station that they were doing an interview..."exclusive" to channel 9 with ACA.
I'm sorry, I didnt realise that when u wanted to keep something a secret that you would go out and do a television interview that would be broadcasted across Australia. *pfft*
=)
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy - Wedding Episode was so cool. I have always pictured as a girl, that i would like a garden wedding...and the episode was quite inspirational...i love the decor and the gift for the guests. It made me feel like i should be a wedding planner because i just wanted to go out there and do all the planning and decorating! ahahahhaaha...im a glutton for punishment!
You know how baby Montana, from Melbourne was kidnapped. I heard from her mother on the radio last nite driving home, that she didnt want Montana to ever know about the kidnapping....but then this morning i heard on the same radio station that they were doing an interview..."exclusive" to channel 9 with ACA.
I'm sorry, I didnt realise that when u wanted to keep something a secret that you would go out and do a television interview that would be broadcasted across Australia. *pfft*
Monday, August 09, 2004
Superhero, sadly i'm not...
Sometimes, i get so angry with the injustice of the world...that i just wished that i was a superhero to save every person's day!
Funny thing is, im just a girl. Would it not be weird and a bit threatening for a guy to be saved by a girl? Threatening to his ego that is...
When i get angry, because someone i care about gets physically hurt, i feel like hurting the other person just as badly...and if its for a "misunderstanding" ie a mistake from the person in the wrong, because they were too stupid to realise anything else...well, i get so heated up that i feel like killing the person who caused the pain!
I wish i was capable of irradicating all the scum from this world!
Although, with a name like "petals" what would my super power be? Scattering fresh flower petals over the scum so that they will turn into happy model citizens of the world??? Yeah, rightio...
I sometimes wonder if it would have been better that i was born a male instead of a female? Like if my little brother and i had traded places. I think im stronger (emotionally) than he is, and i am definitely the one with the hottest temper.
And i think in rare occasions im more violent than he is. Im more fitted to the role in saving a damsel in distress than he would be...and if i seriously thought that i could be a superhero...i would fill the position better as a male superhero...
Cos guys would feel inadequate if a girl saved them from some evil evil villain...whilst girls would welcome a guy saving them from a frightening situation!
*sigh*
Sadly, in the state that im in, im incapable of doing much to save anyone's day...*pooh*
Funny thing is, im just a girl. Would it not be weird and a bit threatening for a guy to be saved by a girl? Threatening to his ego that is...
When i get angry, because someone i care about gets physically hurt, i feel like hurting the other person just as badly...and if its for a "misunderstanding" ie a mistake from the person in the wrong, because they were too stupid to realise anything else...well, i get so heated up that i feel like killing the person who caused the pain!
I wish i was capable of irradicating all the scum from this world!
Although, with a name like "petals" what would my super power be? Scattering fresh flower petals over the scum so that they will turn into happy model citizens of the world??? Yeah, rightio...
I sometimes wonder if it would have been better that i was born a male instead of a female? Like if my little brother and i had traded places. I think im stronger (emotionally) than he is, and i am definitely the one with the hottest temper.
And i think in rare occasions im more violent than he is. Im more fitted to the role in saving a damsel in distress than he would be...and if i seriously thought that i could be a superhero...i would fill the position better as a male superhero...
Cos guys would feel inadequate if a girl saved them from some evil evil villain...whilst girls would welcome a guy saving them from a frightening situation!
*sigh*
Sadly, in the state that im in, im incapable of doing much to save anyone's day...*pooh*
Friday, August 06, 2004
crazy/beautiful
I was anticipating a teeny bopper type of movie last nite...and so i was also expecting to go to bed early because i thought i would get bored by 30 minutes into the movie and so i would nod off on the couch.
Surprisingly, its not so much a "teeny bopper happy go lucky with a couple of mishaps" type of movie...it was strange. I was sitting there thinking that it was actually going to end on a bad note...no happy ending here, missy!
I was glued to the tv, and even though i was consciously thinking it was going to end in a not so typical happy ending, in my heart i was hoping it would.
I get annoyed when i read books and the ending leaves me unsatisfied. I use to hate watching movies where the ending was sort of stunted short. Making u wonder if they had used all the money so they couldn't afford a sufficient ending?
Since watching more artsy type of movies, im learning to accept endings that are not so "adequate" in my eyes, or as "fulfilling" as i want them to be. I have accepted that some endings are sad, and i have to live with it.
So, i was quite charmed to find that crazy/beautiful ended on a happy note, a little bitter but happy. And i felt really satisfied watching someone fall apart, and out of love, found the strength to admit that they were hurting everyone around them as much as they were hurting themself. She realised that she needed to pull herself together, face her fear and make peace with her father.
What i also liked in the movie was the photographs she (the character) was taking...i feel like taking up a photography course. I think the photographs and the montages of them, helped develop and end the movie really well.
=)
Surprisingly, its not so much a "teeny bopper happy go lucky with a couple of mishaps" type of movie...it was strange. I was sitting there thinking that it was actually going to end on a bad note...no happy ending here, missy!
I was glued to the tv, and even though i was consciously thinking it was going to end in a not so typical happy ending, in my heart i was hoping it would.
I get annoyed when i read books and the ending leaves me unsatisfied. I use to hate watching movies where the ending was sort of stunted short. Making u wonder if they had used all the money so they couldn't afford a sufficient ending?
Since watching more artsy type of movies, im learning to accept endings that are not so "adequate" in my eyes, or as "fulfilling" as i want them to be. I have accepted that some endings are sad, and i have to live with it.
So, i was quite charmed to find that crazy/beautiful ended on a happy note, a little bitter but happy. And i felt really satisfied watching someone fall apart, and out of love, found the strength to admit that they were hurting everyone around them as much as they were hurting themself. She realised that she needed to pull herself together, face her fear and make peace with her father.
What i also liked in the movie was the photographs she (the character) was taking...i feel like taking up a photography course. I think the photographs and the montages of them, helped develop and end the movie really well.
=)
Thursday, August 05, 2004
Miscellaneous thoughts...
* I got invited to an ex-colleague's wedding. The invitation is really pretty...it has a photo of the bride and groom to be. I have a dilemma...the last time i went to a church wedding, was a friend from highschool, but it was during a work day...so i just wore what i wore to work because i worked half the day.
So, what do u wear to a church ceremony in the day? And how dressy do you get when its not family? I have so many evening dresses, but i think i might be overdressed for the evening reception on this occasion.
* Ive been so excited to hear more from this new starlet - Missy Higgins. But her album isnt out as yet...she is only supporting Pete Murray at the moment...i cant wait for her album to come out and then she can go tour.
She is 20 turning 21 next month...a local talent from Melbourne...her song "Scar" has been sung live on the Panel & on Kyle and JackieO's show...she is getting a lot of air-play on the radio too...I was getting excited about her before all the publicity but they beat me to it, on harping about her! *LoL*
* Did i mention that i got good tix for the Natalie Cole concert @ State Theatre? I cant wait, it will be spectacular to hear her sing Unforgettable - Live! I'm certain that she will take my breath away as much as Buble or Jewel did.
* I got a call from a guy last nite on my home number...he sounded cheerful...i was wondering why i was getting a call at 8pm? Since i completed uni, the uni was conducting a survey...i think they do it with every graduate. I'm certain i filled out the questionnaire...as to whether i posted it off, im not 100% sure. So, he asked if it was okay that he asked me over the phone. I said sure, since id rather we just get it over and done with and i didnt have to fill the form in again.
So, we go through the questions, and in between the questions we were chatting. Its funny, i sorta hated talking on the phone lately...i think its because i spend alot of time with clients on the phone. I actually enjoyed the conversation with this guy. I learnt that at 3 y/o he learnt how to hold chopsticks, mind you he is caucasian and he is left handed but can eat with chopsticks with both the left and right hand. His favourite type of food is Vietnamese. He finished a degree in Science - Physics and something else related to Bio-Med.
This guy was funny! Had it been another situation...i think i would have chatted him up. But since i was just answering some questions from a survey...eh...that was just that!
But i gotta admit, those 15 minutes were the most enjoyable minutes i have spent on the phone recently. hehehe...
* My lil brother broke up with his gf again...and she asked him to get back together, but this time around they stayed apart. I learnt all this from my nosey older brother. I had noticed how my lil brother has been sleeping early, without any mobile phone ring tones going off in the middle of the nite...
According to my older brother, there are 2 hot chicks who have declared their love for my lil brother...thats quite sickening for me to hear...i wonder how my lil brother feels about it...? Albeit, his head would be too fat for his room...but i hope he doesnt fall for a girl who declares her love for him right away before knowing the boy!
* Even as a girl, i think it is wrong to be putting make up while u are driving! I was behind a red festiva and the girl was applying her mascara on while in the car, in slow moving traffic! The traffic may have been crawling but we werent in a stand still...and she actually moved her rear view mirror in line with her view so she could apply make up on! Like WTF??? She then went on to apply her lipliner...im surprised she didnt whip out a can of hair spray to do her hair. Although, she did fix her hair a number of times!
We should ban these people from driving!!!
* Reminder to self: Remember to smile!
So, what do u wear to a church ceremony in the day? And how dressy do you get when its not family? I have so many evening dresses, but i think i might be overdressed for the evening reception on this occasion.
* Ive been so excited to hear more from this new starlet - Missy Higgins. But her album isnt out as yet...she is only supporting Pete Murray at the moment...i cant wait for her album to come out and then she can go tour.
She is 20 turning 21 next month...a local talent from Melbourne...her song "Scar" has been sung live on the Panel & on Kyle and JackieO's show...she is getting a lot of air-play on the radio too...I was getting excited about her before all the publicity but they beat me to it, on harping about her! *LoL*
* Did i mention that i got good tix for the Natalie Cole concert @ State Theatre? I cant wait, it will be spectacular to hear her sing Unforgettable - Live! I'm certain that she will take my breath away as much as Buble or Jewel did.
* I got a call from a guy last nite on my home number...he sounded cheerful...i was wondering why i was getting a call at 8pm? Since i completed uni, the uni was conducting a survey...i think they do it with every graduate. I'm certain i filled out the questionnaire...as to whether i posted it off, im not 100% sure. So, he asked if it was okay that he asked me over the phone. I said sure, since id rather we just get it over and done with and i didnt have to fill the form in again.
So, we go through the questions, and in between the questions we were chatting. Its funny, i sorta hated talking on the phone lately...i think its because i spend alot of time with clients on the phone. I actually enjoyed the conversation with this guy. I learnt that at 3 y/o he learnt how to hold chopsticks, mind you he is caucasian and he is left handed but can eat with chopsticks with both the left and right hand. His favourite type of food is Vietnamese. He finished a degree in Science - Physics and something else related to Bio-Med.
This guy was funny! Had it been another situation...i think i would have chatted him up. But since i was just answering some questions from a survey...eh...that was just that!
But i gotta admit, those 15 minutes were the most enjoyable minutes i have spent on the phone recently. hehehe...
* My lil brother broke up with his gf again...and she asked him to get back together, but this time around they stayed apart. I learnt all this from my nosey older brother. I had noticed how my lil brother has been sleeping early, without any mobile phone ring tones going off in the middle of the nite...
According to my older brother, there are 2 hot chicks who have declared their love for my lil brother...thats quite sickening for me to hear...i wonder how my lil brother feels about it...? Albeit, his head would be too fat for his room...but i hope he doesnt fall for a girl who declares her love for him right away before knowing the boy!
* Even as a girl, i think it is wrong to be putting make up while u are driving! I was behind a red festiva and the girl was applying her mascara on while in the car, in slow moving traffic! The traffic may have been crawling but we werent in a stand still...and she actually moved her rear view mirror in line with her view so she could apply make up on! Like WTF??? She then went on to apply her lipliner...im surprised she didnt whip out a can of hair spray to do her hair. Although, she did fix her hair a number of times!
We should ban these people from driving!!!
* Reminder to self: Remember to smile!
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Melodrama to the nth degree...
Remember when i last wrote about my circle of friends going out with eachother? What i wrote was apparently confusing for everyone but me...so hopefully this is clearer...
Basically, in highschool there was our circle of girls, the 6 of us. And there was their circle of 6 guys. Our two circles hung out with eachother but after highschool, because we went to different universities, we stopped hanging out...the guys were non-existant to us for a very long while.
5 years down the track and one of the girls had changed religions and is no longer in our group as it doesnt go down with her religion very well...so there are 5 girls, 6 guys.
1 girl and 1 guy got together straight after HSC.
Now, in the span of a month, 3 girls and 3 guys have gotten together.
That leaves me and 2 guys.
Normally, this kind of maths wouldnt be such a bad thing...2 guys for 1 girl...but these guys are like my brothers, so lets not go there...
The most recent pair to get together is my best friend and one of the guys. She called last nite to give me the goss...and i was stunned and dumbfounded! Normally, i would be ecstatic that there was someone that she was interested in and was interested in her also...but this sorta happened out of nowhere and the person happens to be one of the guys from our circle (she didnt even see this coming).
I'm happy that my friends are finally finding happiness with someone in their lives, because prior to this they had never dated anyone. So, this is progress in my opinion.
But these girls are like my sisters (as im in a family with 2 brothers)...those guys are like my brothers...i talk to them like they were my own real brothers...i feel a bit incestuous...and im not the one dating them!
I just feel weird and i dont know how im suppose to deal with it, but i obviously have to.
I pretty much guessed that my best friend was going to say that she was seeing one of them, cos the first thing she said to me was the "guess what, i have news!" statement, that all the others had said to me before declaring they were going out with one of the guys!
What is also getting my knickers in a knot is the fact that because im single they are all throwing really tired cliches about my prospects in finding a guy! "There are plenty of fish in the sea..." and "don't worry...don't look for it cos it will just happen, out of nowhere!" or "if it happened for me, it will happen for you..."
Uno, when i got together with my previous boyfriends, i never belittled their single status or thrust these cliches at them. And i would appreciate it if they would stop trying to make me feel better about a situation that i didnt feel bad about in the first place.
I dont have a problem with my being single...my problem is the fact that almost all of my "brothers" had asked all of my "sisters" out.
Thats my problem!
Basically, in highschool there was our circle of girls, the 6 of us. And there was their circle of 6 guys. Our two circles hung out with eachother but after highschool, because we went to different universities, we stopped hanging out...the guys were non-existant to us for a very long while.
5 years down the track and one of the girls had changed religions and is no longer in our group as it doesnt go down with her religion very well...so there are 5 girls, 6 guys.
1 girl and 1 guy got together straight after HSC.
Now, in the span of a month, 3 girls and 3 guys have gotten together.
That leaves me and 2 guys.
Normally, this kind of maths wouldnt be such a bad thing...2 guys for 1 girl...but these guys are like my brothers, so lets not go there...
The most recent pair to get together is my best friend and one of the guys. She called last nite to give me the goss...and i was stunned and dumbfounded! Normally, i would be ecstatic that there was someone that she was interested in and was interested in her also...but this sorta happened out of nowhere and the person happens to be one of the guys from our circle (she didnt even see this coming).
I'm happy that my friends are finally finding happiness with someone in their lives, because prior to this they had never dated anyone. So, this is progress in my opinion.
But these girls are like my sisters (as im in a family with 2 brothers)...those guys are like my brothers...i talk to them like they were my own real brothers...i feel a bit incestuous...and im not the one dating them!
I just feel weird and i dont know how im suppose to deal with it, but i obviously have to.
I pretty much guessed that my best friend was going to say that she was seeing one of them, cos the first thing she said to me was the "guess what, i have news!" statement, that all the others had said to me before declaring they were going out with one of the guys!
What is also getting my knickers in a knot is the fact that because im single they are all throwing really tired cliches about my prospects in finding a guy! "There are plenty of fish in the sea..." and "don't worry...don't look for it cos it will just happen, out of nowhere!" or "if it happened for me, it will happen for you..."
Uno, when i got together with my previous boyfriends, i never belittled their single status or thrust these cliches at them. And i would appreciate it if they would stop trying to make me feel better about a situation that i didnt feel bad about in the first place.
I dont have a problem with my being single...my problem is the fact that almost all of my "brothers" had asked all of my "sisters" out.
Thats my problem!
Tuesday, August 03, 2004
7-Days to undo a good habit...
I was on a good ride...they say it takes 21 days to develop a habit. My habit was formed in about 18-20 days, and it was a good cycle that i was traversing through.
And then it took me 7 days to undo all the good i have done.
In other words, it took me 1 week to break something that took me 3 weeks to make.
*good one petals*
So, im hopping back on the bandwagon...and hopefully, it will take me a shorter time to develop the good habit...and it will be longer for me to break it the next time around - if i break it!!!
And then it took me 7 days to undo all the good i have done.
In other words, it took me 1 week to break something that took me 3 weeks to make.
*good one petals*
So, im hopping back on the bandwagon...and hopefully, it will take me a shorter time to develop the good habit...and it will be longer for me to break it the next time around - if i break it!!!
Monday, August 02, 2004
Is your figure less than Greek?
What i'm enjoying about Australian Idol right now, and about last nites episode was Billie McCarthy's Funny Valentine...i really like her voice and the way she sings...its soothing...i also really love that song...it reminds me of Michael Buble at the Opera House...it was the final song he sang...accapella...*sigh*...
I also like Chanel Cole (current favourite of the judges)...i like the fact that sometimes she just wants to have fun when she sings, and so...she does. I admire her as a team player, helping the girl who forgot her lyrics to the song they were suppose to sing as a group...by quietly singing it behind her, never out-singing her team mate, just prompting her along.
I wish i could sing...like Ngaiire Joseph...the final song she sang last nite...it just knocked me off my feet! She is so emotive and soulful...im far from capable in singing, let alone make people feel what i feel when i sing...(other than sharp pain to the ears).
I hope that these starlets get far in the competition, it would be a shame not to be able to hear them sing anymore.
I also like Chanel Cole (current favourite of the judges)...i like the fact that sometimes she just wants to have fun when she sings, and so...she does. I admire her as a team player, helping the girl who forgot her lyrics to the song they were suppose to sing as a group...by quietly singing it behind her, never out-singing her team mate, just prompting her along.
I wish i could sing...like Ngaiire Joseph...the final song she sang last nite...it just knocked me off my feet! She is so emotive and soulful...im far from capable in singing, let alone make people feel what i feel when i sing...(other than sharp pain to the ears).
I hope that these starlets get far in the competition, it would be a shame not to be able to hear them sing anymore.
Sunday, August 01, 2004
Correcting past mistakes?
I know that my brother's and i have been spoilt by our mother. I think she too, came to a point and realised that what she was doing, by giving us everything we wanted was a BIG mistake.
I'm so slow sometimes...as a teenager, i enjoyed her stories about the past...before she came to Australia...stories of her trip as she migrated here...stories about the other women in our family, their hardships...all the hard things people had to go through...
I would sit and appreciate the stories, but i did not fully understand why she was telling me about those things. I enjoyed those times listening, as it would often occur on a rainy Sunday afternoon...either as i was helping her mix some ingredients for dinner that nite or there was simply nothing to watch on the tv. It was our time that we shared...
Our time, these days would be my taking her out to get the groceries. Those times back then, was a time before i had my license or my car...when i was still young and malleable...
During those times, i now think she was trying to correct the wrong before it could not be undone.
It had always left me an odd sensation...as we would both cry and laugh heartily during those moments. I'd sit in silence, because what she told me would usually get me so choked up that even if i had tried to speak, nothing would come out.
Her stories were like chapters out of a book, switching between the country side...to the city...to a war torn period...to heartache...to sighs of relief...to various deaths...there was just so much for her to tell me...so much that i wanted and needed to hear from her as those stories seemed to always answer questions i had in the back of my mind.
I now understand a bit more...part of the reason she tells me these things is to humble me. And i am grateful that she reminds me subtley with her stories. Those stories take me off my high horse and bring me down to the ground. They make me appreciate what i have now, especially my mother. They help me to understand why she wanted to spoil us, and ultimately, makes me want to stop being a spoilt brat!
She still spoils us out of habit and im still a brat sometimes...but i am happy to hear her stories as frequently as i need them. I get so caught up with what i think is "my life", forgetting who i affect in the process of taking my actions.
The present seems to pass me by without any form of appreciation.
Today at present: I am well (minus the flu). I have a good family that are always there for me. I have a tight circle of friends who's true essence remains the same. I feel all emotions. I can move forward. And at this instance, I am happy!
I'm so slow sometimes...as a teenager, i enjoyed her stories about the past...before she came to Australia...stories of her trip as she migrated here...stories about the other women in our family, their hardships...all the hard things people had to go through...
I would sit and appreciate the stories, but i did not fully understand why she was telling me about those things. I enjoyed those times listening, as it would often occur on a rainy Sunday afternoon...either as i was helping her mix some ingredients for dinner that nite or there was simply nothing to watch on the tv. It was our time that we shared...
Our time, these days would be my taking her out to get the groceries. Those times back then, was a time before i had my license or my car...when i was still young and malleable...
During those times, i now think she was trying to correct the wrong before it could not be undone.
It had always left me an odd sensation...as we would both cry and laugh heartily during those moments. I'd sit in silence, because what she told me would usually get me so choked up that even if i had tried to speak, nothing would come out.
Her stories were like chapters out of a book, switching between the country side...to the city...to a war torn period...to heartache...to sighs of relief...to various deaths...there was just so much for her to tell me...so much that i wanted and needed to hear from her as those stories seemed to always answer questions i had in the back of my mind.
I now understand a bit more...part of the reason she tells me these things is to humble me. And i am grateful that she reminds me subtley with her stories. Those stories take me off my high horse and bring me down to the ground. They make me appreciate what i have now, especially my mother. They help me to understand why she wanted to spoil us, and ultimately, makes me want to stop being a spoilt brat!
She still spoils us out of habit and im still a brat sometimes...but i am happy to hear her stories as frequently as i need them. I get so caught up with what i think is "my life", forgetting who i affect in the process of taking my actions.
The present seems to pass me by without any form of appreciation.
Today at present: I am well (minus the flu). I have a good family that are always there for me. I have a tight circle of friends who's true essence remains the same. I feel all emotions. I can move forward. And at this instance, I am happy!
