...as though I have lost something, but it was never mine to begin with???
Is it more devasting to feel such a loss, than actually sustaining a true loss of something that is yours?
I guess its warranted if it belonged to you, that you would feel immense sadness when you lose it.
But its not mine. And i do feel sad. But i really shouldn't.
Am i selfish for feeling this way?
I think i'm feeling pangs of jealousy...of it being acquired by someone else...but i need to remind myself...it wasn't yours, you have no claim, you shouldn't even feel sad.
I'm pathetic sometimes.
About the wedding...its over! I have a broken toenail from the Friday night before the wedding. There was torrential rain before and during the wedding ceremony. It was a crying fest. And more about it later.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Slacker...
I've been extremely slack in blogging. Sorry.
But November is a horrendous month. I have all these farewell parties, birthday parties, gatherings, race, wedding...the whole month is booked out.
And i still need to lose a couple of kilos with only a week left, essentially, before the wedding!
So, updates after Venice will happen in December. That is, if work doesnt take over my life.
I can't wait until i go to KL and SG.
I need to get away again...
But November is a horrendous month. I have all these farewell parties, birthday parties, gatherings, race, wedding...the whole month is booked out.
And i still need to lose a couple of kilos with only a week left, essentially, before the wedding!
So, updates after Venice will happen in December. That is, if work doesnt take over my life.
I can't wait until i go to KL and SG.
I need to get away again...
JP Morgan Corporate Challenge 2007
I finally did the race last night.
Last year got cancelled on both attempts due to the "Strong 80km/h winds" and i was extremely disappointed that after all my training that i would not be able to go for my run.
This year, we got to the park early at 4:30pm and it was threatening rain. It started to drizzle around 5pm and all we could do was wait around anxiously.
By 6pm we all packed up and headed towards the starting line.
Its self seeded and you were expected to line up next to the time where you thought you could run per km.
So there were markings for people who could do a km in under 4.5 mins and then there were markings for those who thought it was take >4.5 mins to run per km. For the elite competitors, they were supposed to stand in the front and walkers were expected to start behind anyone running. This was to keep it fair.
But the signage wasnt clear, or people were blind, or they just didnt care. People walking the race went straight to the front near the elite. I was going to make a serious attempt, but i knew my limits and so i stood after the signage for >4.5 mins/km. But since walkers were crowding around in front of me, my team and i moved forward near the signage that said <4.5 mins/km.
I'm relieved that i moved forward. Next to me was some girls with oversized handbags on their shoulders, some with backpacks...obvious walkers...and it irritated me so much that i just wanted to sound to go off for the start.
The race was late by 10 minutes.
I was getting antsy.
Then the sound went off and when i got to cross the start line 1:15 mins was already lost. The first km was a hill and although i knew that it was going to be there, i didnt know the course well and was surprised. Going down the hill for 500m everyone around me just picked up exceptional speed and so i followed suit.
For some reason, when you have markings telling you how many kms you have just passed, it makes the whole experience feel extremely long. 1km felt like 2kms to me. I had maintained an even pace except for the hill bit, until i hit 3kms and i could feel the burn.
Its funny, i was motivating myself by talking to myself...not out loud, but in my head, i was telling myself to keep running. Things like "you've done 5-6kms before, this is nothing different"..."P is just ahead, keep her in your line of sight"..."you can finish this, c'mon!!!"..."just keep jogging, dont start walking, just keep jogging"...
So, i slumped between 3-5kms, intermittently picking up. I tried to pick it up to a consistent pace...when we hit 5kms, i heard someone in the background telling his team that now was the time to peak. And so i thought "yeah, 600m...i should pick up the pace"...but i was really thirsty. I tried to pick it up. And i did run faster than i had been in the last 2 km, but then i slowed down because i couldnt maintain it.
Then something weird happened. And i'm sure the runners out there will know what i'm referring to.
When i could finally see the clock it displayed 34:59 and i got really peeved because i wanted to do the run in under 35 minutes. And this was the point where i sprinted the last 200 metres and overtook around 20 people to get the time of 35:12, draining every last breath i had in me.
I'm not the fittest looking person. I'm sure the video footage of me, had someone filmed me from start to finish, would have looked extremely funny. I wonder how i looked while running the last sprint overtaking so many people...
My legs were like jelly. I was sooo dehydrated...I was dripping head to toe in sweat...I was pretty red in the face too...But i was so happy that i did 5.6km in 35:12 minutes.
Its in line with my expectations. And if you minus the delay from the start, i reached my goal by getting under 35 minutes.
I'm definitely going to do this race again next year!
Last year got cancelled on both attempts due to the "Strong 80km/h winds" and i was extremely disappointed that after all my training that i would not be able to go for my run.
This year, we got to the park early at 4:30pm and it was threatening rain. It started to drizzle around 5pm and all we could do was wait around anxiously.
By 6pm we all packed up and headed towards the starting line.
Its self seeded and you were expected to line up next to the time where you thought you could run per km.
So there were markings for people who could do a km in under 4.5 mins and then there were markings for those who thought it was take >4.5 mins to run per km. For the elite competitors, they were supposed to stand in the front and walkers were expected to start behind anyone running. This was to keep it fair.
But the signage wasnt clear, or people were blind, or they just didnt care. People walking the race went straight to the front near the elite. I was going to make a serious attempt, but i knew my limits and so i stood after the signage for >4.5 mins/km. But since walkers were crowding around in front of me, my team and i moved forward near the signage that said <4.5 mins/km.
I'm relieved that i moved forward. Next to me was some girls with oversized handbags on their shoulders, some with backpacks...obvious walkers...and it irritated me so much that i just wanted to sound to go off for the start.
The race was late by 10 minutes.
I was getting antsy.
Then the sound went off and when i got to cross the start line 1:15 mins was already lost. The first km was a hill and although i knew that it was going to be there, i didnt know the course well and was surprised. Going down the hill for 500m everyone around me just picked up exceptional speed and so i followed suit.
For some reason, when you have markings telling you how many kms you have just passed, it makes the whole experience feel extremely long. 1km felt like 2kms to me. I had maintained an even pace except for the hill bit, until i hit 3kms and i could feel the burn.
Its funny, i was motivating myself by talking to myself...not out loud, but in my head, i was telling myself to keep running. Things like "you've done 5-6kms before, this is nothing different"..."P is just ahead, keep her in your line of sight"..."you can finish this, c'mon!!!"..."just keep jogging, dont start walking, just keep jogging"...
So, i slumped between 3-5kms, intermittently picking up. I tried to pick it up to a consistent pace...when we hit 5kms, i heard someone in the background telling his team that now was the time to peak. And so i thought "yeah, 600m...i should pick up the pace"...but i was really thirsty. I tried to pick it up. And i did run faster than i had been in the last 2 km, but then i slowed down because i couldnt maintain it.
Then something weird happened. And i'm sure the runners out there will know what i'm referring to.
When i could finally see the clock it displayed 34:59 and i got really peeved because i wanted to do the run in under 35 minutes. And this was the point where i sprinted the last 200 metres and overtook around 20 people to get the time of 35:12, draining every last breath i had in me.
I'm not the fittest looking person. I'm sure the video footage of me, had someone filmed me from start to finish, would have looked extremely funny. I wonder how i looked while running the last sprint overtaking so many people...
My legs were like jelly. I was sooo dehydrated...I was dripping head to toe in sweat...I was pretty red in the face too...But i was so happy that i did 5.6km in 35:12 minutes.
Its in line with my expectations. And if you minus the delay from the start, i reached my goal by getting under 35 minutes.
I'm definitely going to do this race again next year!
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
This time today...
...2 whole months ago, I was in Venice.
It all seems like a blur.
It was a whirlwind tour. Didn't feel like it at the time, while i was there, but it definitely seems so now upon reflection.
Venice was the beginning of excitement for me. The start of seeing extremely vibrant colours.
Everywhere i had been to up until Venice was pretty but not plain, and more polite, like conservative.
While in Venice and all the places there after the colours were exuberant and sometimes in your face...wildly exotic...& passionate.
I miss all the vibrancy.
I watched Sabrina (the movie) on the weekend...and there were bits of her in Paris...and i soooo long to be back there.
I can't wait for next year...I can't wait for P's wedding in Mauritius and more of Paris...*sigh*...
It all seems like a blur.
It was a whirlwind tour. Didn't feel like it at the time, while i was there, but it definitely seems so now upon reflection.
Venice was the beginning of excitement for me. The start of seeing extremely vibrant colours.
Everywhere i had been to up until Venice was pretty but not plain, and more polite, like conservative.
While in Venice and all the places there after the colours were exuberant and sometimes in your face...wildly exotic...& passionate.
I miss all the vibrancy.
I watched Sabrina (the movie) on the weekend...and there were bits of her in Paris...and i soooo long to be back there.
I can't wait for next year...I can't wait for P's wedding in Mauritius and more of Paris...*sigh*...
Friday, November 02, 2007
Venice
Day: Thursday, 13 September 2007
Wellbeing: Good
Weather: Warm and fine
Highlights: Glass blower built like a tank @ Murano, Bridge of Sighs, Murano Island, Burano Island, & Romano Restaurant. Canal ride via the gondola and then a cruise via another boat passing the Rialto bridge.
The boat rides were enjoyable...Saw how glass was blown at the Murano glass house. Visited all the main highlights on the island. Walked through the St Marks, Doges Palace and crossed the Bridge of Sighs and saw the jail in which Casanova was said to have stayed in...
Bought a lot of pendants at a Murano Outlet. Bought postcards on Venice city centre and on Burano Island. Also bought a lace fan from Burano - simple badge like piece of lace to add to something.
The food at Romano was delicious and there was a lot to eat!
Venice is busy with tourists, but it is still very enchanting, as i suspected. On the gondola ride through the canals it was apparently smelly, but i had a blocked nose - thankfully! While on the gondola ride i flirted with one of the gondola drivers/steerers by blowing a kiss to him and Lauren joked that had just accepted his proposal of marriage!
Found Mr March for Dianna, he was the captain on the boat ride to Burano through the lagoon.
No choc buying today.
* Lauren and i had drinks at the Danieli Hotel, paid for by our guide, because she wanted us to look after her belongings after the gondola ride. The Danieli is a gorgeous hotel on the island of Venice near the Doges Palace. The interior is really pretty and i am extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to sit and just relax inside at the bar.
Wellbeing: Good
Weather: Warm and fine
Highlights: Glass blower built like a tank @ Murano, Bridge of Sighs, Murano Island, Burano Island, & Romano Restaurant. Canal ride via the gondola and then a cruise via another boat passing the Rialto bridge.
The boat rides were enjoyable...Saw how glass was blown at the Murano glass house. Visited all the main highlights on the island. Walked through the St Marks, Doges Palace and crossed the Bridge of Sighs and saw the jail in which Casanova was said to have stayed in...
Bought a lot of pendants at a Murano Outlet. Bought postcards on Venice city centre and on Burano Island. Also bought a lace fan from Burano - simple badge like piece of lace to add to something.
The food at Romano was delicious and there was a lot to eat!
Venice is busy with tourists, but it is still very enchanting, as i suspected. On the gondola ride through the canals it was apparently smelly, but i had a blocked nose - thankfully! While on the gondola ride i flirted with one of the gondola drivers/steerers by blowing a kiss to him and Lauren joked that had just accepted his proposal of marriage!
Found Mr March for Dianna, he was the captain on the boat ride to Burano through the lagoon.
No choc buying today.
* Lauren and i had drinks at the Danieli Hotel, paid for by our guide, because she wanted us to look after her belongings after the gondola ride. The Danieli is a gorgeous hotel on the island of Venice near the Doges Palace. The interior is really pretty and i am extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to sit and just relax inside at the bar.
Vienna & Venice
Day: Wednesday, 12 September 2007
Wellbeing: Okay, stuffy nose
Weather: Cloudy, then fine
Highlights: Coming to the hotel in Venice after it was changed on us (error by Tour company).
Park Hotel - Villa Marcello Giustinian (4* Accommodation) was an exceptionally beautiful surprise. King sized bath towels & shower cap (no other hotel has provided this until tonight).
Dinner was at 8:30pm and we had a gorgeous 4 course meal, starting with the local sparkling wine. We then had bruschetta, then i had lasagne (the other option was vege ministrone), then i had a ham/bean/carrot dish and for the main and after main we had a creme caramel for dessert. It was divine!
The foyer of this boutique hotel is beautiful and the garden is suppose to be glorious. I'll check it out tomorrow morning. Although, we do have a jam-packed day.
As we crossed Vienna into Venice, we reached Venice as the sun was setting. The view via the bus was glorious. Frankly, it made me feel as though a chapter in my life had finally come to a close, ready for the new chapter to begin!
If we were still together i would have expected a proposal by now. How ridiculous of me!
No more.
Wellbeing: Okay, stuffy nose
Weather: Cloudy, then fine
Highlights: Coming to the hotel in Venice after it was changed on us (error by Tour company).
Park Hotel - Villa Marcello Giustinian (4* Accommodation) was an exceptionally beautiful surprise. King sized bath towels & shower cap (no other hotel has provided this until tonight).
Dinner was at 8:30pm and we had a gorgeous 4 course meal, starting with the local sparkling wine. We then had bruschetta, then i had lasagne (the other option was vege ministrone), then i had a ham/bean/carrot dish and for the main and after main we had a creme caramel for dessert. It was divine!
The foyer of this boutique hotel is beautiful and the garden is suppose to be glorious. I'll check it out tomorrow morning. Although, we do have a jam-packed day.
As we crossed Vienna into Venice, we reached Venice as the sun was setting. The view via the bus was glorious. Frankly, it made me feel as though a chapter in my life had finally come to a close, ready for the new chapter to begin!
If we were still together i would have expected a proposal by now. How ridiculous of me!
No more.
