I empathise...

I was reading this and I was picturing myself saying those exact words to someone i currently feel that way about.

Im tired of people who are now adults but are not just young at heart, but are actually young in the head too!

If someone says no, dont persist like a 5 y/o...and whinge and complain. You were one straw short of throwing yourself on the floor with a tantrum...how selfish are you? your arguement was based on the fact that "you dont have many long weekends to go out". When the other person said no, they indicated that they were very tired...they didnt want to drive far...and they had to work the next day and didnt want to be buggered when they arrived at work. Which in my opinion is fair...in their defence i suggest to you "why dont you drive?" Your only response to that was silence...but that didnt last long...because within a minute you were back harping on the fact that YOU wanted to go out!

Other plans were made to just go to someone's house and relax...you managed to screw that up at 1:30am when everything was planned out and organised. You didnt care about how others felt...all you cared was that you got your way.

I just cant believe that im associated to an inconsiderate little whench, who is only self serving! You have no feelings, no morals, you are disrespectful to everyone...and yet there you are sitting on a high horse...GET OVER YOURSELF!

Elle Woods...

I have a pink tweed suit ready for my Graduation...I would feel better wearing the tweed jacket with a pair of jeans...but i dont think jeans would look good under the robe during the Graduation Ceremony...

I actually purchased a pair of pink heels to match my outfit...and it just struck me that i dont have a bag to match...*pooh*...i have a pink handbag...but its the wrong pink...
=(

I may have to resort to my brown lil oroton purse...so i can carry my drivers license and cards...to pay for the photos and framing of the degree...

I was considering on wearing a string of pearls a la Elle Woods...but i just cant do it...ahahhaaha...that would just be toppling the neat and chic to omg! tacky. And its also a tad too mumsy for my liking...

Its funny...my lil brother is skipping school for my Graduation and he came up to me last nite and asked "what do i wear?"... you'd think that it was my wedding. ahahaha

Now, question is what do i wear to my party on Saturday nite???

Collagen or Botox?

Its ironic...my mother warns me right before i leave the house to go to the National Park, she says: "don't get burnt...did you bring sunscreen?"

I'm like: "yes mum...i brought the 30+ sunscreen...i'll be fine!"

I come home and she took one look at me and was disappointed. Since my Graduation is this Friday...and that just occured on Monday...it doesnt give me much time to heal...

To be honest i think its funny, in retrospect...its just a fat lip...and it has subsided a little bit, much thanks to the boiled egg i was rolling over the top of my right lip.

What does it look like? Its like i had really bad cosmetic surgery done! Its not bruised, just swollen...and its made my normally full lips look totally disproportioned. I was seriously considering playing volleyball and getting hit by the ball on my left side of the lips so that it would even out! ahahaha...then mum would have seriously killed me!

How did i get the fat lip in the first place? Well, we rented out 2 canoes and one row boat cos there was 7 of us...initially i was just gonna sit in the row boat while 2 friends rowed the boat...but my best friend was splashing too much (with the oar) and i was getting soaked...once we docked i swapped with another friend in a canoe. She hopped into the row boat, while i got into the canoe taking her spot. For revenge along a quiet strip of water i got my best friend drenched. She wanted revenge, but since rowing is harder and two girls who have never rowed before, are quite unco about it...they zig-zagged for a very long time, so i reached the dock with my friend way before they could catch up. But since we were in the busy part of the river (heaps of people on those big water bikes), i didnt think that my friends would try to get me back...but they did. In the process of defending myself, the handle of my oar went smack bang into my mouth!

This hasnt deterred me from canoeing...i love it! and there was this spot that we reached (that i was surprised that the thought even popped into my head)...i think it would make a good "Proposal Place"...and one of my male friends said that that was what he thought. You could have a fabulous picnic there, the serenity and intimacy of picnicing on a rock whilst the sun goes down...very Japanese Story...! Its weird...i thought that i would like to be wined and dined at some chic restaurant before a show and i derno, be proposed to under the stars...ahahahaha...but i quite like the idea of canoeing to a secluded place and upon reaching the destination - finding a picnic already laid out...and if a guy proposed to me there, even in my cargos and singlet after working up a sweat rowing there...i would say yes to him!

I dont like the thought of fishing...but after yesterday, I can see myself fishing in a boat, just sitting there so long as the weather is good...with the sun either just coming up or just going down...with a slight breeze, i could fish all day...heheheh...i think the "great outdoors petals" had been dormant, just waiting for someone to coax her out...and it finally happened! Thanks to you! ;)

My Buble...

"I see alot of gentlemen out there tonite...ino it was your wife or gf or bf who brought you here...*laughs*...they said (impersonating a female voice) 'lets go watch michael buble'...(impersonating a deeper male voice) 'michael buble???'...it doesnt matter that you didnt want to be here...cos its not about me tonite, its not even about the music and its definitely not about these guys (points to the band behind him)...its about the good men out there, the nice ones...its about helping those men get laid tonite!"

Audience starts clapping mad...

At which point two men from front row got up and shook Michael Buble's hand for his help in getting them *some* for the nite...hehehe

This guy is a star! Its not just about his voice...he has a charisma...a presence on stage...he can dance...he connects with the audience...when his band puts him on the spot, he lives up to the challenge...he isnt afraid to poke fun of himself...and he is humble!

I watched Michael Buble at the Opera House last nite and im still smiling about it! He took my breath away and put a warm fuzzy glow in my stomach. When i think about the performance, i just secretly smile! He sang all the songs from his album...and then he sang his favourite songs...a song dedicated to his grandfather...a song that he sang at his first Talent show at 16 y/o...he sang Kermit the Frog's - Rainbow Connection, a Lenny Kravitz song, he started skatting (awesome) and then he turned and sang Mack the Knife...he did Funny Valentine (and i just *swoooned*).

M will hate the fact that she missed this concert...i mentioned earlier that his band had put him on the spot...what they did was...initially...somehow Michael started talking about Michael Jackson...so he started singing a young Michael Jackson song (can't remember what it was) and it was cut short cos it was just a joke...Michael continued talking to us and then the drummer was starting to play Billy Jean and coaxed the other band members to play too...Michael didn't see this coming...and the audience cheered Michael to sing...and he did and in the second verse...he just didnt know the words and said "get to the chorus"...it was brilliant and fun! ^_^

Time just flew by...i remember when we first sat down in our seats there was this older woman in her late 50s or early 60s who was there to watch the show on her own...and then a couple came along...surprisingly that couple was that older woman's friends that she hasnt seen in 20 years (so they told me while they laughed with tears in their eyes)...i think that was icing on the cake! Imagine going to a concert on your own and ur friends that you havent seen for an ultra long time happen to go to the same concert and have the two tickets right next to you!
*^_^*

I did a bad thing though last nite, but that bad thing will bring me joy for a really long time...i brought my MD and recorded the concert...ino i wasnt allowed, but i regret not recording Jewel in the Concert Hall...that venue makes the singer's voice resonate...having the equipment...being in the Concert Hall...knowing that Michael would sound fantastic...i would have been a fool not to record Michael Buble!

So i did, and i listened to it while i slept last nite, i think i floated to heaven...

Social Observation: Is 30 the new 20?

I recall in an email spam where we discussed 30-somethings at the parties that us 20-somethings happened to be at too. A friend said that we could bash him if we found him at a club or party when he was 30-something...cos it was just way too sad.

According to an article i read in this months Cosmo, us 20-somethings seem to be getting younger, partying harder, or resisting long term relationships, even though we are approaching the big 3-0. What a lot of 20-somethings offer is that we are more inclined to finding out who we are and want to "play" for an extra decade before settling down...and i agree.

Think about our parents...once they hit an "appropriate" age, they got married and had kids...paid off the mortgage...and tried to hold the fort down at home with the level of stress at work rising. It would have been very difficult to find some parents who lived their lives before they settled down, and if there is a set of parents who had many adventures before marrying...i think in their time...they would have been considered weird.

Today, if i had said that i wanted to travel around Europe before going to Uni it wouldnt be too weird...only in asian circles would it seem like blasphemy...against your parents wish of you studying medicine/law/pharmacy/optometry/dentistry/finance/accounting/you get my drift...but to be honest, i have mentioned to my mother that before i would even consider settling down...i want to travel the world...i cant wait to do Europe...i think i would especially adore France...only because i can get a handle of the language...hehehe...but anyways...my mother agrees...she encourages me to travel the world...and more so, explore the things that i would like to accomplish.

Im in my early 20s and like i said in the blog before my 23rd birthday, i feel more like im turning 20 than im turning an age that is fast approaching the mid-20s. Im not surprised that there has been this observation that 30 is the new 20. Most people ino now are in their mid-20s or have just past it and are single, carefree, fun-loving, and enjoying life. I saw it in my aunt who is, i think, 32 this year. She has been travelling the world...nurturing her career...and excelling in being a great aunt to her little neice and nephews (the ones younger than me, of course...hehehe).

Im wondering if this has any correllation to the way we were brought up...generation by generation...we sorta had a lil bit of indepedence as kids...a lot of the times we were more innocent and were hidden from the dramas of life...usually at home...id like to think our parents and the schools taught us to be cautious...i was also brought up informed and aware that sometimes it just takes time to find what you want to do and how to go about getting it.

If everyone in the same age gap as i am in, was taught the same things, of course then, we wouldnt be in a rush to get from A to B. Im open to exploration...quite frankly ino im not going to stay in the same industry as far as my career is concerned. But as to what i want to do after IT...i dont know...but i have about a decade to find out before the crunch of having a stable career will really hit me. Thats according to this social observation.

I was considering my younger brother's age group...because he is 6 years younger...and he is always claiming that "things are now different to when you were in high school" to me...when he is in his 20s will their group revert back to the way our parents were? and the new 20 will just be 20?

I say this, much based around my brother and his friends. They are a bunch of 16 y/o with jobs that pay well for a bunch of 16 y/o...im not talking Mc D's...im talking about selling mobiles, and gadgets...while my brother fixes mobile fones. My brother now buys things that he use to ask me to buy for him for his birthday, or Christmas...or "if i wanted to be a good sister"...that would mean a pair of lee jeans...altho he has a hankering for a pair of tsubi's...which i might get him for his birthday...but thats much to be decided upon on whether i want to be a good sister or not, or he may get it before i offer...he has a flavour for Industry clothes, anything urban esp mooks...he is always accessorising - were talking belts, hats, wrist bands, coloured hair gels, etc...he just bought himself a pair of nike bball shoes - the new ol' skool type...and he is currently sporting a mohawk.

Its been peeving me off lately that he thinks he can act like an adult...going to a party at Gas on a Tuesday nite and coming home after 2am on Wednesday...sorry, i dont give a shiet on whether or not its the holidays...kids who are 16 shouldnt be that far from home at that time of nite. What shiets me further is that he didnt ask my parents if he could go, he just said "im going to this party on Tuesday nite."

hmm...this blog isnt about my lil bro's lack of respect and respect for authority in our household...so im gonna move right along...

The point about my lil bro and his friends, in relation to what i intended on writing about, is that because they are more independent now that they are still young...this is much due to the fact that there is a lot of dosh flowing...because they are being more adult-like than perhaps we were at their age...because they are all in long relationships at a tender age...they may foolishly think that they know what they want...and that is, the lot. House, wife, kids and career...and they may go all out and just achieve all those things before they realise that they didnt enjoy life more in their 20s.

Or, his generation may actually find the perfect blend in which my generation seems to be using a 10 year delay tactic to over come - not that it should sound like a bad thing.

I like the fact that it has been widely acknowledged that 30 is the new 20...it gives me more time, the time that i was going to use anyway...but now, i wont look like a sad forlorn spinster working out her life. Now im a trendy 20-something who is only at the start of finding out who she is and enjoying life without anyone querying about it! Except for the dreaded asian community...someone should hurry up and publish an article in the Chinese/Vietnamese Newspapers about & recommending this, and the news will run faster than a fire through a village built out of wood. And then the asians will act like they set the bar for this "30 is the new 20" thing. And then, your parents will come up to you and urge you not to get married so soon and pop out the grand kids!!! *Wishful thinking?*

Hahaha...i should stop being so mean!

Light up Sydney!

If i wasn't going to Mey's party tomoro nite, i sooo would have gone to this.

I wish there was a day time version of it since i will be in the city anyways...

But i will boogie woogie the nite away! ^_^

She has no shame.

The three of us had an enjoyable lunch. We also had a fun time getting the nibblies for the Farewell drinks at work. When we got back to work there she was, apparently fuming. I thought she was joking when she opened her car door and slammed it into u...I mean, I even said "Hi!" to her...but she rudely replied with silence. I think that was the point when phil and i just continued walking to the front door. As we were walking, approaching the steps...in the background i hear a slap amidst the quarrel...i think u organised lunch with her, but u forgot and she waited for u to return...i dont know why she didnt call ur mobile, because your phone was on...i remember phil using ur phone to call alex.

phil and i took a couple more steps and as we approached the door, we both hear another slap, and phil turned to me and said: "gee, that was a loud slap...i wouldnt take that from my woman, especially not in front of my work mates!"

and thats when i pointedly said to phil: "i would never do that to my guy, especially not in public. whatever that needs to be discussed, should be discussed in private. a man needs to be treated like a man - shown that respect, so that others will show him respect...at least in public!"

obviously that is me, and i cant say that for other women out there. but i feel like i get kicked in the gut when i see girls treating guys like dirt...i mean worse than dogs, cos those type of women would be pampering their dogs...

ive sat in the car to go to lunch with both of you before...we were gonna go to lunch and she was bored, so she joined us...i hopped into your car, and she just stood their waiting for you to open the door, and when you did, she refused to sit down...the car seat was apparently too dirty for her highness' arse! lucky for her, you had a bag of old clothes that you were going to put in a bin for charity. and so you took some old t-shirts and lined the chair for her, including the chair's back.

during that car ride she kept calling you a wanker, and at first i thought perhaps it was a pet name thing...quirky couple...who knows right? well the ride to the shops and the ride back...i actually lost count on how many times she called you a bloody wanker! i'm sorry, but i think its utterly disrespectful that she was calling you names, and all you had were sweet names for her, like hun...my princess...etc...

she isnt completely to blame for your mistreatment, uno...obviously you are putting up with it, although...if i were you, id boot her precious butt right out of the door! you are a great guy...funny, considerate, hard working, attractive...etc...i dont know why you sit there and take it? you are far more attractive than she is, far more attractive personality-wise than she is. whilst she is just plain mean!

so is it true when they say that you gotta be mean to keep them keen?

i mean, im difficult but i dont roll a guy flat out like a steamroller! she could bulldoze you my friend and the saddistic thing, is that you would be there taking it in stride! at which point i must ask you: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???"

i was about to walk into our departments office, when you catch up with me. you come after me with the bag of nibblies and a red left cheek in tow...you act as though nothing has happened...and although i want to ask you a million questions as to why you are still with her and why you feel you must cop the abuse...cos both phil and i would dump her in an instant...i bite my tongue and act like nothing happened!

Is something wrong with me?

I'm not sure how to explain how im feeling lately...

Is it simply because i'm so busy that i dont feel lonely or have i accepted the fact that im single? I know i dont want a bf...but is that my true feelings. I dont know what i want really, about anything in my life...but i think i want to be single...wait - i know i want to be single! But the confusing thing is, i have known the inner Petals tricking the Petals on the outside...so right now, im not sure if i "really" want to be alone, or i just think that is what i want, and have convinced myself so...

I actually want to be at home...and go into hibernation like a bear...that would be my ultimate dream come true...but im so busy - im just out there doing something somewhere sometime - well nearly all the time.

When i was playing touch footy at Bulli Beach on the grassy area...i took my thongs(flip flops) off so i could run...i havent walked barefooted on grass for years...i found myself walking in a weird way...like the skin on the bottom of my feet was ultra delicate and would break upon contact with the grass...my inhibitions were gone when the game started...but i miss the simple things...

I miss family traditions...like our beach days...which was usually a public holiday...cos that was when dad was free to take us to the National Park or to Wollongong, or Newcastle, etc...

I miss having my own picnics in the yard...and just lying on the ground and staring at the clouds...and when feeling like a challenge, doing some somersaults...

I woke up this morning and flicked on the tv...im torn between being clued in with the news and watching cartoons! Dragonball had morphed into something else, im like 3 generations behind in the story! =( Apparently, Astroboy is making a come back on ABC...its suppose to be on soon. I've asked my friend to find out the time and date cos he works with ABC...but i have a feeling, because its a "new generation" Astroboy...its gonna be shiet like how Transformers came back all ultra slick looking, but the stories lacked depth! *pooh*

I'm not even looking forward to going to Michael Buble @ Opera House anymore...I heard him croon to Sway on the radio as i was getting my lunch today...it didnt make me sway like it normally would...[i must be sick!]

I was resolved at one moment...now im just tired + irritable...im not even looking forward to my own party, let alone organise my best friends shindig...my mother said to me "I dont know what to wear on the 30th April." I stared at her blankly, thinking it was another wedding...and when she failed to reply to my deadpan expression i asked her "What is on the 30th?" Which in reply, she alternatively gave me a deadpan expression. It took me a good 5 mins to realise she was referring to my Graduation Ceremony. I dont think i care anymore...its more of a hassle, cos now i have to look for something to wear under the black gown. *hmph*

One moment ago, i was embracing my full life. But now, i think i just want to get back to the simple things in life...streamline my life...or move to Melbourne - where it is quieter, but i can still shop crazily - whatever option is quickest to achieve!

I dont think that im currently lacking in challenges, as im currently been thrown a whole heap of projects to do at work on top of my daily tasks. I've started a heavier regime at the gym, so my energy levels should be perking up...i hope im not getting sick!

*bleh*

Easter Tan

I didnt think i would get a tan over the Easter break...i didnt plan to go to the beach either...i didnt plan to spend so much time with my high school buddies...nor did i plan to dance at a party for hours on end....i didnt plan to play xbox esp halo and get so addicted that i played it after going to the beach...i didnt plan to go swimming at the local pools especially after going to the beach...i didnt plan on getting an ultra sore body cos after boogie boarding and having waves breaking on me, we were throwing the vortex around...which was fun until i got injured...AND we played touch footy after lunch! I havent played anything competitive since high school...and i became really competitive after 10 mins of running bare footed dodging people before i got tipped...my body balance class really helped me, cos i was leaping in bounds! ahahaha...cos im asthmatic...i really surprised my high school friends...i out ran them! hehehe ^_^

on another note, whilst i was applying sunscreen on my legs at the beach...my forthright friend said: "So whats up with u and ?"
O_o: 'Nothing...were just friends.'
Forthright friend: "I hope your not going out with him!"
O_o: 'NO! were just friends...i dont even like him!'
Forthright friend: "You know your too good for him!?"
O_o: 'Err...okay...'
Forthright friend: "I just wanted you to know that u deserve better, thats all! He isnt right for you...he's not good enough!"

I never thought my forthright friend would say that to me...cos she is like the last person who should be giving me advice on guys...let alone on a guy that she doesnt really know that well...i mean...i know he isnt a good bf candidate for moi...and im not interested in him that way...he is a good person and he is loyal and trustworthy and on time! that makes him a brilliant friend! im not the type of person who turns ppl away cos they arent good bf material...im not like that, i like giving ppl chances and i like to make new friends! I dont look at guys and wonder if they will be my next boyfriend...i look at guys and think: "hey...he is funny *hehehe*, i'd like a friend like that!"

on the next note: whoever thinks that 50 first dates is crap, is in my opinion narrow minded! its a good movie for what it is...i mean the movie isnt trying to be an epic love saga...its a romatic comedy, Drew-Sandler style...ie its suppose to be like a Wedding Singer...its suppose to generate laughs from silly tomfoolery...it was meant to have some bad jokes that were utterly lame...but got a giggle or two out of you! if you expected more then u were cheating urself out of a simple feel good movie that was light hearted and entertaining! =P

after a 4 day long weekend...i feel restless at work...i just want to sleep at home like i did on Sunday ALL DAY ALL NITE! hehehe...im such a bum...i dont think it helps that my manager is not in yet...and its lunch time! >_<

*sigh*

Somethings missing...

I havent been catching the train to work for about 4 months now...instead i have been driving...

Whilst driving is quicker than the train...i realised today, from my train ride with friends, that there was something missing in my mornings and evenings now that i drive...

When i use to catch the train i read heaps more...the time on the train was reading time...the imaginary world was so lush...now its fairly dull...*bummer*...i need to read more, but since i save time by driving to work, and i cant really read while driving...i spend my time saved with friends or at the gym...or doing something...which isnt such a bad trade off...to be honest...but the ride today with friends was a hoot...i laughed til my throat ached...and i miss that!

Not all train rides are as hysterical as todays...but i would like that reading time...and i would like that gossiping time too! But that only comes with train buddy...and since M and i catch the same trains even when we transfer...its fun! We dont get to have our chuckles at the gym anymore because she is busy with her assignments...so the train ride is a good way to catch up.

I remember the rides to uni with all my friends...id catch the earlier train just to meet up with my friends...that was the social time that we could really devote because we were inundated with assignments, work, projects, partners, etc. It was made easier, because we all went to the same uni...so the ride on the train would be filled with gossip, and when we got off the train...the gossip would continue until we split to go our separate ways! hehehehe

I see my friends sporadically now...because they hmm...are more homebodies than i am? If we go out, it is usually an occasion...someone's birthday, graduation, some sort of celebratory thing in which they have to put the effort in to turn up. We use to go out more, that was when i use to organise things...but since i stopped organising events...no one else did...which is why we dont often see eachother...to me its silly...its like Valentine's Day...why do ppl wait until its V'day to send flowers? Well, why must ppl wait until its someone's birthday before u visit them or call to say hello? Why couldnt u just do that on a rainy Sunday arvo when you had a moment to urself?!

Clarity...

I should clarify some things...

I was wrong to say that there are no cute guys out there...cos there are...apparently im just looking in the wrong places...

I was wrong to say that i had never received a love letter in my whole entire life...i went through my stuf looking for my tax return letter from last year and i came across an express post envelope from one of my ex...he sent me a little note from work one day...

"Hi Dear,

How do you do today?
I miss you!
^_^

Signed Ex."

I smiled while reading the simple hand written message...in the envelope there was something that he made with his own hands for me (which i think i treasure more than the thing he bought me for our anniversary)...i remember the story behind it, something that he told me after i received the envelope while we were on the train going to work...

It was sweet...and i really appreciate it...cos without it, i wouldnt have this beautiful memory...
*^_^*

23 Today!

Thank you to everyone who have wished me a Happy Birthday so far...it means the world to me that i have such lovely friends who wish me all the best & it all started at midnite on the dot!

^_^

It started with Bun and his msg wishing me a Happy 19th Birthday! ahahahaha...(You just know how to make me feel like a youngen! Oh so Teeny bopper, eh?)

Then i received an sms slightly after 00:00 from a friend that was least expected cos we havent spoken for so long...and if i was still crushing on him...i would still be swooning over it! hehehe

This morning on the train...my best friend wished me the best day ever and was hoping that i would be bumping into hot guys all day and to perve on behalf of her!

I came into work and i see a couple of e-cards being sent me way! *^_^* Another sms popped up on the fone from James.

I go to this blog and i see a tag from Mey and a mention on her blog...and throughout the day i see other tags popping up too...Thank You my sweet hearts! *mwah*

Another email from another friend..."May you meet many more hunky guys in suits this year :p" ...

My ex just sent me an e-card as i was typing this...kekeke...

I even got an anonymous sms...which really means i just didnt store the number from the person who sent it to me. ahahaha

I'm so touched i think im gonna cry...

*mental note: stop being gay petals!

Ironies thus far...

So im turning 23 tomoro and yet i dont feel like im getting older...im at that fun yet awkward stage...like when ur turning 20...ur no longer a teen, and yet ur not quite an adult...

Other ironies i have come across in the past week:

(1) I'm going to the gym to tone up and hopefully lose some weight. When i finally made the conscious decision to go to the gym and do something positive, who comes to serve me at the counter on my first trip back? None other than a girl named Ana.

(2) I dislike Gwyneth Paltrow - i refuse to watch movies that she is in - even if the reviews say that she is excellent in it - her bloody academy award teary eyed thing just made me sick!!! and since Jackio O lurves her...i dislike Jackie O by her association (admiration) of the said disliked one!

(3) I whine about my skirt and heels run on M's blog and yet its due to that skirt and those heels that i received the compliment of the day. While fruit&vege shopping with my mother on Thursday nite, the grocer caught me returning a trolley-with-a-mind-of-its-own and he helped me replace it after i grabbed another...and i politely say thank u to him for putting it back for me...he replies "I only help beautiful ladies!" Like OMFG...if only he knew how much that had made my day! *LoL*

(4) Every female has a vice. It can be anything but they all have at least one. I on the other hand have a vice for almost everything material. So, i have an overload of shoes, bags, clothes, accessories, belts, jewellery, hair ties/clips/bands, gadgets, etc...

(5) I wear outrageously high heels to make myself feel better about my short legs. So, im vertically challenged and i've worn heels so often that when we must challenge our body during a "balancing" track for my body balance class...(ie go on our tippy-toes and stay tippy-toeing while squatting and then standing up-right again)...i do it effortlessly without wobbling like everyone else...heels basically f*** up the knees...i do body balance to undo the f***ing up...i think its working! =P

(6) I consciously put my clocks 10-15 mins faster than what the real time is, just so i can be on time.

(7) People who think im a lovely person have yet to meet the ugly bitch that resides in me.

(8 ) Why is it so hard for me to like my ex just a fraction of how much he likes me? He deserves someone so much better, if only he realised it...

(9) I crave for so much, but im a lazy bum.

(10) I've invested so much in me...monetary-wise...i think it was a bad investment...hahaha

(11) I appreciate what you have done for us, but i just dont appreciate you.

(12) Don't show me that you appreciate what i can do and/or what i can do for you...because i use that and take advantage of the situation and/or take advantage of you...and thats when u witness irony (7).

Compliments...

I thought i was receiving the best compliments this week!
I really really really did feel on top of the world...

I was told: "YOU ROCK PETALS!" and "YOU'RE THE BEST PETALS!" *hehehehe*

And then this morning while listening to 2dayFM, comedian Judith Lucy beat me in the compliments stakes...

A guy called Josh from Meadowbank, who was playing "Know Your Crap"...after he won the game, he was gushing to her: "...You're the best Judith! I'm a gay man and even I want to marry YOU!"

Is that a compliment, or what?! *ahahaha*

Renovating me!

I started an 8 week program to renovate me.

I have it all planned out.

Each day of the 8 weeks i have mapped out my exercise plan. The intensity in which i should be working at, when to do my cardio and when to start my resistance training. I have even planned when to do my detox, but thats pending on my doctor's thumbs up.

Why am i being a fanatical health freak, who is going to measure her every improvements? Because i have noticed the effects of "letting myself go!" (My clothes feels tight on...and i dont like it!) So, i am going to make a difference in the way i look and make myself feel better about the way i look. And in the end, i hopefully will look much better than i do now. But ino at the least i will be more toned.

Week 1 has already started.

Triplets of Belleville, Pete Murray, Lion King & Quidam!

I'm so excited...and i just can't hide it...im about to lose control and i think i like it! (I don't sing that as well as the Pointer Sisters...sorry!)

*^_^*

When i was watching the Oscars this year...I saw these 3 singers pop up singing a lil diddy for a cartoon called "The Triplets of Belleville" and it was such a jazzy number...it made me want to watch the cartoon and i was wondering when it would open in cinemas here. Its a French cartoon and is being shown now during the French Film Fest...and i got tix for this Saturday! *hehehe* I'm a lil happy camper...thats what i am!

And then on Saturday nite...i'll be catching the Pete Murray Concert after the movie...*woohoo*...im just about to burst with excitement!
=D

And then on Tuesday nite...i'm a going to watch Lion King! *woohoo again* I just can't wait...I just can't wait! hehehe

I have in my hot lil hands, front row seats to Quidam - by Cirque Du Soleil...can u believe it?...its the best seats in the Big Top (not incl. VIP seats)...A reserve, seats 1 and 2...altho its for the Matinee...thats fine...suits me better...cos i can go to Paddo Mkts and then go catch the show! *double woohoo*

Altho...this is all getting costly...but anyways...im happy and thats what counts!

*gush*

Its funny, uno...how often do we hope and wish that our parents would be proud of us and our achievements? and then one day you turn around and realise that you, urself are very proud of your parents achievements.

My parents came from Vietnam and it was a hard struggle to get where they are now. But i know that they would prefer the struggle that they have to go through here in Australia versus the continuous struggle that they would have gone through if they were still in Vietnam.

My mother in particular, is why im writing todays entry.

Its a strange thing...she will be 50 this year and yet she looks like an older sister to me. She is a grandmother of two and if she took her granddaughters out, ppl would mistaken them as her daughters. Today she was found out! By that, i mean she was hunted by an up and coming fashion house to make dresses for them. They called the fashion house that my mother has been working for to get the number of the contractor that my mother directly deals with. the contractor called my mother this morning, asking my mother whether or not she would be interested in making some dresses for them. They said they wanted "the woman that had sewn those dresses for Carla."

My mother has been working for Carla Zampatti for about a decade now, and she usually makes the formal/cocktail dresses for the designer. For a woman with no formal training, my mother is a natural talent. I wish i had her skills. I love fashion. If you see the dresses on the HUGE poster on York St (or Kent, i get confused with those 2 streets)...or maybe in the window of the Elizabeth St boutique...or maybe even in GB's City store (now Myers)...those beautiful dresses were made by my mother.

I looked at the sample of the dresses she is sewing for the new designers...i felt the fabric and ino why they looked for my mother...silk, silk chiffon, those type of materials are very difficult to sew...and to make those skinny straps, with all those details in the sewing...making the dresses without tearing into the fabric is a challenge if u dont know what to do.

I asked my mother: "Don't you feel good that they wanted YOU, mummy, to make these dresses?"
Her reply: "No, look at what i have to sew, its annoying!"

She was referring to the detail she had to put in the dresses...i think it pisses her off, that although she isnt working like in a sweat shop environment, she is still far from working in a glamourous position...and she feels very little appreciation from her "higher" employers...

I think it also peeves her that the designer of her current employer is a dopey, boobless woman. Her demands are somewhat "ridiculous"...she doesnt actually sew the clothes herself, but she thinks things can be done "her" way. Even though you dont have to be a dressmaker to realise that what she wants to do is terribly wrong and tedious.

But in homage to my sweet mother...im proud of her. In the fashion industry, i would take it as a compliment that another fashion house wants YOU to make their dresses, because they know that they need the right dressmaker to pay enough attention to the quality of detail in producing those beautiful dresses.

Congratulations Mummy!
*^_^*

Agree to disagree...but pls let me say this:

Independence means losing out in love (in my case):
It is working against me that im too self sufficient. That i have a fantastic network of family and friends. To the extent that i dont give a crap and i dont want a relationship with a guy. I have yet to meet a guy that excites me or makes me feel like i want him. (M thinks thats sad and worrying...but im just telling it how i see it as a reflection of myself). A new friend suggested that i play on both fields...but he doesnt get it, that i dont want to play - with anyone.

Bras:
I believe girls need more than one bra. How does a girl survive with only ONE bra??? It just doesnt work? I think the bare minimum would be at least 4 bras. Two white bras, one black, and a nude convertible strap bra.

Pacts:
I do believe that i already have a couple existing pacts with my ex's...that by the time were either 30y/o or 35y/o (cant remember which age corresponds to which ex) and still single that we'd marry eachother for the companionship. Its a dopey backup plan, and no i wasnt drunk...and i dont even know how it came about...but yeah, we verbally pinky swore over the phone...so im not even sure if that holds up as a promise!

Irrespective of that...the reason why i bring up the notion of pacts is that i received a really odd email on Friday after lunch from E. He sent a one line email reading:

"When you and i are 30 and still single, lets make a pact to have sex!"

I ask why and he informs me that L has made a pact with E's friend and so he is jealous that they have one. So now he wants a pact...and of course it has to be with his Cherry bomb! So, i modify the pact to:

"When you and i are 30 and still single, lets do something crazy like skydiving!"

E's response is:

"Thats even better, sex on the plane!"

I wasnt going to win. -_-"

Clubbing:
When i was 18 and started clubbing...i would see all these ppl...& wonder how old they were...and mostly they were my age. I feel old now when i go clubbing. Like last nite. I was surrounded by teeny boppers...its just weird if u go clubbing and all the ppl u say hi to are your friends lil bro or sis. I feel old, and i think i look old. Im not saying this because i dont like the fact that i look older. Contrary to that, i think with the couple of years of sleepless nites programming + partying like an insane woman has actually given a lot more character to my face. I look a lot less like a chubby cheeked squirrel, which has gotta be a good thing! My cheek bones are more prominent. I just look my age.

But yeah...ive hung up my dancing shoes...my knees are hurting...i think i will need to recuperate for like 2 months (or forever) before i think about going back.

Dance with me, dont rub against me:
If i was drunk, things might be different...but as uno i dont drink and so im not intoxicated - im aware of everything...so please if u wanna dance with me, id be more than delighted to accompany you...but by no means, get up close and personal and start bumpin' and grindin' with me front-front. If it was back-back, i can accomodate cos im gonna be dancing close to ppl like that without knowing...its a very small venue...

Trust:
My friend, building trust occurs at the start of a relationship. If you have not done anything to prove that u are untrustworthy or disloyal, and she still has trust issues from her previous relationship...then thats just it. She is the one with trust issues from her ex. Its shouldnt reflect on you as being a bad guy...she needs to resolve her issues.

Brother-Sister:
I met a guy who hated his sister. Like HATED. I was surprised at how much he hated her. He said that it was the normal brother-sister hate...M and I just looked at him and said...no we dont hate our brother like that! I admit, there are moments that i will loathe my brothers. Cos those baboons can do or say some really dumb things to their sis. But admittedly, i still love them. My brothers are my protecters and saviours when im in need. As lil kids of course we fought, but now were older we get along much better. And by no means do i ever hate them for longer than an hour or so. But my silent treatments last longer than the hour or so...hehehe...well, i gotta make them learn from their mistake! =P

Age:
My birthday is coming up...im suppose to feel older, but ive been thinking...

i feel younger.

is that weird? i mean of course when im surrounded by the teeny boppers at the club i feel old relative to them. but i dont feel like im on the verge of being 23...i feel like im going back a year...or two...i actually feel like im turning 20.

Up and Huff!

Do u wanna play hard ball?
I'll show you a thing or two!
=P

Im stubborn and when i set my sights on something i really want...warning: STAND OUT OF MY WAY!

*mwauwhauhahauha*

/evil grin

p.s: I gotta post my caricature from last nite...it rocks! Many thanks to Steve Panozzo!

Busy busy bumble bee!

Things i will be doing from tonite until the end of April:

18/03/04 ~ 2DayFM Pool Party
19/03/04 ~ Friend's Birthday
27/03/04 ~ Pete Murray Concert @ Metro
30/03/04 ~ The Lion King @ Capitol Theatre

03/04/04 ~ Sunset Boulevard @ Luna Park
04/04/04 ~ Australia's Wonderland (? Not 100% sure...talk about going has stopped).
09/04/04 or 10/04/04 ~ My Birthday Celebrations (? No guarantees...i think i might make my Birthday & Graduation rolled into one thing).
15/04/04 ~ Friend's Birthday
17/04/04 ~ Maroon 5 Concert @ Gaelic Club (? Maybe)
21/04/04 ~ Best Friend's Birthday & Michael Buble Concert @ Opera House
30/04/04 ~ My Graduation Day

I'm tired from typing this out...