Freedom to think, speak, believe...

World Youth Day...5 solid days between the 15-20 July, 2008.

Don't you think it is getting beyond ridiculous that NSW is considering (if not already passed a law) to prevent people from wearing a t-shirt with a slogan that is "anti-Catholic"...or has a message that goes against what Catholic's believe in, and thereby finding it offensive?

In the SMH today:

Police and volunteers from the State Emergency Service and Rural Fire Service will be able to direct people to cease engaging in conduct that "causes annoyance or inconvenience to participants in a World Youth Day event".
People who fail to comply will be subject to a $5500 fine.

Be wary, those in and around the city during this period...you don't want to forget about this event and be seen with a t-shirt with a slogan on it that could be deemed offensive, in front of a World Youth Day participant. You might find yourself being body searched by the police and handed a fine for $5,500. Later on, well after the event, you will find yourself in court wondering what it was that you had really done wrong to begin with to find yourself in such a situation. Because, afterall "causes annoyance and inconvenience" is a broad statement!

Now, what about the offense the World Youth Day is to all those who are not participating? The offense to all the people who do not believe in Catholism. Its not really about the religion, I'm actually more concerned about the principle. The idea that I need to be careful about NOT offending someone else with something that I might believe in or feel strongly about - it's just crazy!

Don't we live in a society where we live by the freedom to think, speak, and believe what we want without having to worry about getting fined for it?

FYI - The law applies to more than 40 city locations, including museums, galleries and cinemas, as well as Darling Harbour, the Opera House, the Harbour Bridge, Randwick Racecourse and parklands.

Check the news or smh.com.au for further details.

Cold wintery night...

What do you do on a really cold wintery Saturday night? Do you brave the cold and wear a skimpy outfit and heels, waiting in line to get into the supposed "hot" city night spot???

Or are you like me, and prefer to rug up on the couch with a really warm throw and a DVD in the player with some chips or chocolate and a hot drink?

Then there is another alternative (one of many depending on your mood)...

Get all rugged up with a warm coat and scarf (beanie too, if you don't mind the hat hair later) and brave the cold between your house and the car...then brave the cold between the car and one of your favourite cafes...where you can meet your friends to play some games while you wait for that mega bowl of tender chicken pieces (the way real nuggets should be) and wedges with sour cream and sweet chilli sauce...and of course...your choice of coffee, hot choc, or my favourite hot apple cider with whipped cream!

Mars Hill is just the place...and E has never played Jenga and it has been forever since he played UNO. It seems that both games can induce great stress...for E anyway! *LoL* I believe we were there for 2 hours...but I had the best night in a long time and it was worth braving the cold for such an event. It wasn't planned...it was on the spur of the moment decision...it turned out to be a very good night.

Mars Hill is on Church Street in Parramatta, on the far end near the Riverside Theatre. Its a small quirky cafe that has an extensive range of coffees and hot drinks, as well as cold drinks...there are also a number of nibblies and snacks and cakes. I think they have some more substantial things on the menu, but I haven't taken a proper look, as I'm often there after lunch or dinner. There is a tallboy down the hallway that houses the games...trivial pursuit, monopoly, jenga, UNO, battleship, mastermind, connect four and a number of other games...

There is a lounge area at the front, a couple of tables and chairs behind the front lounge...there is also an upstairs with more lounges and table and chairs, a private room with the U-shaped bench, but the upstairs is used for live performances on Saturday night which there is a $10 cover charge to enter and its not quite game-friendly.

Its a bitter sweet place for me to visit. I was introduced to Mars Hill by my ex-bestie...shame...and it's also a place I visited with my ex-bf quite often, during our courtship days...

I'm glad that I am able to replace any sad, bitter feelings with warmth and laughter...definitely go back to play UNO and jenga and any other game we can get our hands on in the future. And I definitely recommend the hot apple cider (remember to stir the whipped cream and let it dissolve into the drink...yum!)

The problem is...

I can easily tell you now, what the problem isn't.

This post stems from last weekends low point and a post I read on "Ask Sam" - How to be a Happy Bachelor.

In all honesty, I don't want to be in a relationship just to be in one. I'm not keen on getting married or worried about my ticking bio-clock. I've heard of enough sad stories about relationships where the couple stay together even though its not working, that makes me adamant that I will only marry a person if I love them whole heartedly, and not because I'm lonely.

It would be great if I found that someone, but I'm fine with the way things are now. My career is heading in the right direction...I get to go on wonderful trips - all self funded...but what brought on that aforementioned "low point" was the fact that I realised I no longer have enough single friends to call upon when I want company. So, the problem isn't a partner...the problem is that I need more friends.

Think about the time in which you would want company...most likely the weekends. Most couples spend the weekend together as they haven't seen their partners enough during the week...which is fine. The single friends that I have remaining, well they usually have plans. Not sure what...but they are doing something. So, I really don't know of anyone who is in the same position as I am...wanting to make more friends and not knowing where to find them.

Keeping in mind, I'm not a sporty, group activity type of person and even when I was searching the web for ideas on things to join, its pretty sad that the feedback from Google is actually speed dating as a "social activity"...which it is, but I don't think its the place to meet friends with common interests to expand your social network without giving the other person a misconception.

Its sort of funny, this turn around...they way I feel about networking online. When I was younger...way younger...I used to meet people via mIRC...it was the thing to do, especially when I was in uni. Now, it feels really odd even though everyone is doing it these days...so many people are online and its quite the avenue to socialise...I mean there was a time when it was okay to put ads in the paper...now its via another medium and its a social norm. But for me, there still seems to be a stigma that comes along with it.

Its probably in my head, but because it is in my head, I won't be getting over it any sooner.

Conditional shopping...

I have refrained from buying things for a few months now. All in the effort to save for my NY - Mauritius trip...and I spent a heffer on printing my holiday photos, making photo books, collages, buying albums...9 months after the fact.

But something happened last week, that has spilled over into this week...damn Stocktake Sales!!!

So, it started last Thursday where I bought myself an outfit for Phantom...

Then on Friday night, while I waited for L to finish work, I stepped into Hugo Boss and bought my brother a tie...

And I've tried soo hard to not to buy anything since, but Target is having a massive DVD sale and there are all these packs that are 2 for 1 DVDs at such low prices!!!

So, I went to Target today and bought 4 DVD packs...as I walked out and went up the escalators I was confronted with Cue...which prompted me to consider buying a black skirt, because my favourite black skirt is barely holding together at almost 10 y/o and is obviously losing its shape now...and since I'm a member, I recall there is an extra discount with the card for today.

I waltzed through the store and no black skirt bigger than a size 6.

So, I go to Myers and find the same problem...nothing bigger than size 6, and nothing smaller than size 14. Then, a sales assistant asked if she could help, just as I grabbed a charcoal-ish coloured skirt, but sort of a hue of brown. She went looking for a black skirt my size...while I wandered around. She finds 2 skirts for me and I grab the charcoal-ish one too and march into the change rooms...And what do you know??? The charcoal-ish one fits like a glove...

The sales assistant asks how I'm doing, I ask her to bring the matching jacket to the charcoal-ish skirt and she said there is only one size left...so, I try it and that fits like a glove. I show her and she is really surprised it fits so well...odd how things pan out.

The suit is actually half price...but I got an additional 20% off...so, thats 70% off overall. Talk about a bargain!!!

I must stop shopping, even though I'm finding bargain buys during this sales period...
>_<

I do really need to still save for my holiday!!! *sigh*

Gripe...

I saw this lady, carrying a really cute clutch...very art deco...and white...I think it was glomesh...The odd thing was that this lady was carrying it at the Macquarie Centre and she was a big lady in a sweat shirt, baggy jeans and chuck taylors...so not right...incredible fashion faux pas! It wasn't the fact that she was big that was the problem...it was the whole ensemble she was wearing with the bag that made it seem so off.

I've resorted to listening to my ipod while I work. I don't know what it is, but it helps me focus, so I can do the boring menial admin tasks - like project reporting. I really don't want this to become a habit, but it seems to work.

I really hate it when all my resources assigned to my projects go on leave without telling me. They sort of like drop a bomb on you mid-week before they go on leave. So, any planning gets reduced to a frantic panic attack, because there is no one left to do any work to ensure the deliverables get...well...delivered.

I also hate the days where I am scheduled in back to back meetings for the whole day...no work gets done. Instead I sit in meetings that various new technical terminology gets thrown around...different solutions get thrown around...new teams get referred to and names get thrown around...basically by the time I get out, my eyes have glazed over and I wonder what all these new things are, but I have no time to really find out what they are because I have to go back to my desk and try to do some work so that the day is not a complete ride off.

My workmates and I had formed a syndicate and for the last 3 weeks we re-invested our small winnings into the next highest jackpot for Lotto/Oz Lotto/Powerball. But today we got informed by the organizer that the run has come to an end...I guess I won't be retiring early.

I need to speak to a financial planner/advisor...I need to work out how much extra I should put into my Super so that I can retire comfortably...and perhaps earlier...I also should consider my options for investment. I tried a calculator on CFS website and found that for retirement at 60 y/o, I had over estimated and would be living very comfortably...that is assuming that I will always be paid as much as I am now for the next 33 years. I had also used a calculator on the HSBC website and found that if I made extra repayments, I could reduce my home loan from the 30 years it is now to 9 years. So, as you can see, I need to speak to a specialist in this area to help me figure these things out. The trouble is finding the time and making the effort...I'm going to deal with this after my holiday to NY and Mauritius.

The songs...the music...the stage!

Phantom of the Opera was spectacular!

It took me to a place that I had totally forgotten and it left me wanting more. More musically and more emotionally.

My first experience with Phantom was when I was probably 11 or 12 y/o. I bought this pack from the newsagent which came with a booklet and cassette with all the songs from the musical. I listened to it over and over and over. And somewhere along the way, I lost the cassette and never listened to the Phantom ever again.

On Friday night, it was the first time I had listened to the whole musical in ages...were talking maybe 15 years. But from the first score...all the way to the end note, I recalled everything from those days when I used to listen to my cassette on my walkman.

The production was beautiful. It was moving at an exceptional pace, ever so dynamic. WAYYYY better than the movie. The movie had bored me. The show made me love it again. L and I couldn't stop talking about how wonderful it was as we were walking back to George Street. If only I could tell you about the stage without ruining it for those who have tix.

It was so innovative and glamourous...I was dazzled with how things moved, so to speak...

If you ever had an inkling to go and watch this musical...please do...you won't be disappointed!

The Phantom of the Opera...

I'm going to see the Phantom at the Lyric Theatre tonight.

I'm excited because a male friend who is so not into these things went to watch it a month ago with clients from work...im impressed that he wore a tux for the evening and he was glad too, because where they sat, it really called for black tie...anyhoo...he thoroughly enjoyed it and was amazed with himself that he enjoyed the show...and his feedback was that it was awesome!

Emailed my aunt about her wedding and wondered if she was going to have a Hen's party...I forgot that they don't refer to it as a Hen's night in the US...its a Bacholorette Party...

She responded and said that it would be happening on the Friday before the wedding...I think that is cutting it really close and what that really means is that we can't get her really drunk...I wouldn't want to be bloated before her wedding day, and I don't think she'd be keen on it either.

How interesting...at least I will make it for the Bacholorette party and see how its done in NY...I wonder if it will be remotely similar to a SATC type of affair...hehehe...that would be cool!

I bought a black knit dress and red coat for tonight...I hope its dressy enough...its not black tie, obviously because I'm wearing it at work...and its definitely not the type of thing you would wear if the person you are with is in a tux...lets hope its passable, considering I'm not sitting in a VIP seat.

Oooh...I can't wait!

SATC...The Movie...

On Friday at work, I found out that as part of the Sydney Film Fest, they were showing Kung Fu Panda at the State Theatre for the same price as a normal movie tix. So, I got all excited and tried to buy a ticket....but to my dismay it was sold out!

=(

So, I tried looking for Gold Class tix to SATC to make up for my disappointment in missing out on Kung Fu Panda. And I found a tix for Sunday in Gold Class. So, on Sunday I watched SATC. Unfortunately, I had a stoopid man sitting next to me who made the most ridiculous comments at the most inopportune moments and it irritated me sooo much I really wanted to tell him to shut up!!!

No - we should not just FORGIVE a man when he cheats on you!!!
No - we don't deserve to be cheated on by our husband because of "you know what!!!"

And NO - you don't deserve a girlfriend or wife who will cook, clean and make sushi - placing them strategically on their naked body waiting for you to come home as a surprise on Valentine's Day...because you are an a$$hole without a heart.

I really could have kicked him where it would hurt.

I think he ruined my experience. Because I left really annoyed and dissatisfied. I have to watch a bootleg version and see if I like it without that a$$hole around.

Not to say that I didn't cry...I was talking to my brother's gf and we both cried at the same scene, because we felt extreme empathy and it was something we could see ourselves do, if we were in the same shoes and our friend was hurt like that. But saying that, we both cracked up laughing straight after the scene that made us cry...actually, it was probably the same scene...hahaha...

I'm currently sitting around waiting for my car to be serviced...its going to be a while.

hmmm...

I was going to write about something...and when I finally opened up this page the thought flew out of my mind.

Buble, last Saturday night was really good...I oh so wanted to hear Funny Valentine again...but it just wasn't meant to be.

=(

L and I drank a jug of Sangria by ourselves at dinner before the show and it was great!

Due to some weird circumstances, I ended up with 2 free tix for tomorrow night. I'm taking M with me and its going to be fabulous. I've never been to a concert where the support act was actually really good too! And Naturally 7 are really amazing...you just need to hear them and appreciate that it is only the 7 members...no instruments...no equipment...just them and their ability to manipulate their voices.

V just sent me an sms about Mraz coming back to Sydney for another concert. I knew he was going to come back, he said so the last time we saw him at the Metro...I just didn't know when.

My workmates and I have pooled together for the $50M Powerball syndicate...I hope we win something tomorrow night! It doesn't have to be big...just something.

Its a long weekend this week...you don't understand how much I am looking forward to this! I don't have any plans at the moment, but I think I may just veg at home over the 3 days!!!

=)

DVD all the way...I mean its going to be raining all weekend, so why not?

Trivial...

I participated in a Trivia Night held in support of a charity. It is a small charity for women and children in Afghanastan. I'm not going to get into the details of the charity itself but we raised over $3000 and they were still counting. Considering that it wasn't a BIG event, I think we raised a decent amount.

But on to the night...it wasn't a catered event, so we were encouraged to bring our own drinks and nibblies. We brought chips, lollies, wine, and ordered to pick up wood fire pizzas. It was like having a picnic at night, but in a room sitting at a table...ok, so not quite, but I felt like I was having a picnic at night while playing a game. *LoL*

I was feeling a bit fearful that I wouldn't be able to contribute as much, but I think I contributed with the art questions and some pop culture...some maths questions...the cartoon characters...so, it was fun. I think I'd want to play trivia more often, and if you consider that we only had 5 in the team, while all except one other table had a full team of 8, and we came 3rd last...so, we didn't do that badly overall...right? hehehe...

I'm also considering joining other clubs and societies...I was thinking about doing Toastmasters, something I don't have to commit to on a weekly basis, but on a bi-monthly instance will work better for me. And its about time I went back to public speaking and improving my leadership skills.

At this trivia night, because it was held by my English teacher and Year Advisor (male + female, respectively, who are partners) there were many teachers from High School. It was deja vu for us, as much as it was for them. It has been 10 years, so the question on everyone's lips when they spoke to me was "what are you doing now?" And when I told them, it made them feel good that the education I got from their school had paid off. And it was interesting that in their eyes I'm successful. It was what I imagined a school reunion to be, in terms of the questions asked, without it being a reunion.

I'm currently feeling lazy...2 weeks of working extremely hard has made me want to turn into a vegetable. But I have to write up some documentation tonight. I'm refusing to touch anything now...i'm going to enjoy my day.

Excitement...

Is it wrong that I am more excited over a cartoon and not Sex and the City? If it is...well too bad!
=P

I'm not even "THAT" excited by the next and final Indiana Jones, as I am about KUNG FU PANDA!

I swear...the moment I saw the trailer at the beginning of the year, I was counting the days when it would finally be open in the cinemas and its 1 month and 4 days away...yes, I'm counting...

I'm a fan of SATC...there is no doubt. But I know the gist of it...which is why I'll watch it in the cinemas and get all giddy about it...

I grew up with Indiana Jones, just like most of you...and I have the 3 dvds...so, of course I'll appreciate this final installment...

But Kung Fu Panda is new...and the panda...he reminds me of my older brother...*LoL* It cracks me up. Just typing about the fact it cracks me up makes me smile.
=)

I can't wait until the 26/6...

Wrinkles...

After only 5 days in my new role, I have managed to acquire 2 vertical frown lines between my eyebrows...

I believe it is from stress.

All I can say in response to my face is a half hearted "F#$%".

Lets get on top of things!!! *grrr*

Beginning of something...

I was like "this" tempted to buy a diamond pendant for Mum, this mother's day...shame I just committed to buying fares to go to NYC and Mauritius.

Yes, I've committed myself to going to NYC and Mauritius over Aug/Sept. The airfares for the whole trip was actually okay...but then add the taxes and various levy and it adds up to almost $1K. Like wtf?

Working at the new place was a shock to my system...i had an explosion applied to the brain. Travelling to and from work is crazy...travelling between offices is crazy...i need to remind myself why i chose to do this. Everyone moves around so its really hard to track someone down to train you on anything and if the person is present, they are extremely busy or on the phone with a client.

Sink or swim...? I'm chosing to float first and then breast stroke my way through, keeping my head above water. Be nice, be pleasant, and know that you a very capable of making this work.

I'm ashamed of myself...I didn't organise anything for mother's day this year...but I'll take mum out and do something...

Happy Mother's Day to all that are out there...

Movie ticket for one...

Is it that sacrilegious to go to the cinemas and watch a movie on your own?

I don't think so.

And I went today on my own. I was hoping to catch Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but missed it by 15 minutes. So, I opted to watch The Other Boleyn Girl instead. And I got to admit that I really enjoyed the movies...on my own...its like watching a dvd at home...on your own...the only difference is the size of the screen.

What do I have to say about the movie itself? Well, I'm pretty sure that it isn't historically accurate or sound. But, since I can't remember much about Anne Boleyn, although I did study her in history back in high school, I really enjoyed it.

If I don't check my watch during the movie, then it wasn't boring.

If I don't continually munch on my lollies, then it was engaging.

If I don't think, "WTF?" at the end of the movie, then it satisfied my need to have a clear ending.

I can't say it was the best movie I had ever watched, but I enjoyed it and it served its purpose for a Sunday afternoon. I'm not sure if I would recommend this movie to everyone...i think its a movie only for some.

Ayurve Wellness Spa...

I booked M and me an hour long relaxation massage as a birthday present for M last night. There was a promotion which enabled me to purchase 2 sessions for the price of one. Which was fabulous, I needed one soo much. And M also really needed a massage.

What I didn't anticipate was that there would be two massage beds in the same room. I was expecting the both of us to be in separate rooms, but no...we had two beds in the one room! *LoL*

I never experienced a massage with another person in the room before. Not that it really made a difference, but it was odd all the same. The two massage therapists were matched to our different heights. The taller one massaged me, and the shorter therapist massaged M.

I told my massage therapist that I had a sore back from doing weights at the gym, so she concentrated on my back longer than the rest of me. But had I known better, I should have told her to concentrate on my traps and shoulders and my head. She only massaged my scalp and head 3 times quickly before the hour ended and it felt so good I didn't want her to stop.

M also wished that her massage therapist spent 30 minutes on her scalp and head and neck.

Next time...

I really needed the massage. This week has been stressful. I know, its my second last week...why am I stressing? Well, the company has just realised that I know all the finances for the program (over a 2 yr period), and nobody else has a clue whether their position is good or bad? Their client has no clue either. How ridiculous is that? I'm the only one...a contractor mind you...who knows where their financial position stands. So, I have been stuck doing more financial reports than I could ever recall, and I'm not even a finance person. I have a meeting with their client next week...grrr...to explain to a board of men how much money had flowed between the two companies.

I know its late and I should go to sleep...but I can't be bothered right now.

I actually need to do work over the long weekend.

*sigh*

Lars and the real girl...

I went to Dendy's Opera Quays last night...I've forgotten how much I enjoy going to the cinemas at Dendy's at CQ.

I had wanted to watch Lars and the real girl when I found out that Ryan Gosling was in it. I really enjoyed Half Nelson and no, it is not because of The Notebook...I still haven't watched it yet and probably never will!

If you are after a feel good, offbeat comedy that is done really well, this is the movie to watch. Might be a tad sappy for the blokes...but I loved it. I was actually moved to a point where I got teary eyes...M was moved too...she really needed a tissue while we were in the cinema, but her male friend was sitting between us and I didn't know she needed one until the movie ended and we got out.

Don't get the wrong impression...its not a cry-fest or anything like that. Its a feel good movie after all. Its just that there are moments that tug on the heart strings...there are moments where you feel what the characters feel...there are moments where you feel warm and fuzzy and it brings a tear to your eye...

AND there is a lot of laughs...I laughed quite a lot actually...to a point that I started getting self conscious about it.

Briefly, Lars likes keeping to himself and lives in the garage, while his brother and sis in law live in the house he grew up in. He is a really good hearted, genuinely nice guy...but he obviously has a problem. Whether the problem is big or small...or just an anti-social behaviour...well, you can watch and decide that.

One day he brings a girl home and asks his brother and sis in law if they can put her up in a spare room in the house, because she is religious and it wouldn't be appropriate for her to share the garage with him. He tells them that she is shy and doesn't speak much and that she is in a wheel chair. The girl is in fact an anatomically correct, life sized doll called Bianca.

I'm not going to tell you what else happens, because that would spoil the fun. But trust me...this is a gem of a movie. If you like movies like Napoleon Dynamite or Little Miss Sunshine, if you are a Ryan Gosling fan, if you are looking for something different to watch - I would highly recommend this movie.

*^_^*

Friend...no more.

You know, it really irritates me that since you found yourself someone that the only time you contact me is when you need my help!

You don't contact me via msn to just say "hi, how are you?" And you don't even remember my birthday to send a quick sms reading "Happy B'day"...or belated since you forgot!!! Heaven forbid that you actually email me or even forward a funny email to me...

I sent you a really nice and pleasant sms for your birthday. And I would have called if I was certain that you were by yourself, I mean, I wouldnt want to cause a rift between you and your new special someone. I sent you something along the lines of "Happy Birthday! I would wish that all your dreams come true, but it seems like all have come to fruition except the dream job...so I hope you get that soon!" I mean, how nice is that?!?!

What did i get from you??? Nothing.

Instead on the second day after my birthday I get a msn window popping up at work with a "Hi, how are you?"...sounding all pleasant and promising...BUT it was directly followed by a "I need some advice from you..."

There was no - "hey, sorry I missed your birthday - Happy belated B'day"...

All i got was "I need some advice..." Like WTF???

I'm not your f#$%ing "Go To Girl". And even when I was running around in between meetings and left a voicemail on your phone letting you know I was available to chat now and help you out, you would think that out of common decency, you would have sms'd or called me back to let me know that you have figured something out. Instead of waiting for me to give you a call back to offer my time to help you out...even though you.have.worked.it.out!

And you would think that after I did somersaults for you, you would be a little bit more pleasant with me, especially since you have been a bad friend and you also forgot my birthday...BUT NOoooooooo...you turn around and give me attitude!

How would you feel if you were in my shoes?

When someone you use to hang out with all the time, suddenly finds someone and so they disappear out of your life, and they only contact you out of the blue moon when they need you...how would you feel? A little bit used?

Literally, you have contacted me 2 times since you decided to go MIA. Once after my trip to KL/SG to ask for help about your intimate relationship with your partner (which by the way, made me feel really uncomfortable) and yesterday being the second time - asking me for advice about your career.

Would you feel crappola, knowing that this supposed friend only called or msged when they needed you for their benefit and their benefit alone.

I'm not a welcome mat...I'm most definitely not your's to use...so go F$#% your self!

Thank you to everyone...

Just a quick "Thank You" to everyone who celebrated with me last night!

I had a fabulous time and it is a shame that I had two drinks ending with "death" that really didn't do me any favours at the end of the night.

I swayed into the house and slept really well but woke up at 7:30am...and I was like a kid on Christmas Day in the living room. I opened the presents and read all the cards and was really moved by the fact that my friends had chosen presents that really were "me".

Its funny how each of you worry about what to get me, and you really shouldnt. I have the best friends and each of you know exactly what to get me - even though you aren't 100% sure at the time of purchase...but you go with your gut and i'm extremely surprised and overwhelmed that you know me so well.

Thank you for thinking of me and being there with me and keeping me company all night.

*mwah*

Sometimes, I even surprise myself...

I went into an interview with no expectations...but before I did, I actually went with a girlfriend for her first bridal dress fitting as moral support because of the disaster she had previously...so I was rushing left, right, and centre.

I thought I was running late for my interview at 2pm...in St Leonards...but I ended up being 10-15 minutes early. I decided with the wind, it would be best to hide in the foyer behind closed doors, rather than brave the strong gusts outside. I spoke to the receptionist, signed in, sat down and waited.

It was an interview for nothing specific. They were sent a resume, my resume and for some reason two Program Managers liked what they saw. They asked if I would meet them. So, here I was.

One came down, introduced himself and shook my hand and ushered me outside to a cafe, apologising for the other's delay and explaining why we were going to a cafe and not a meeting room. Apparently, meeting rooms are hard to come by in this office. I wonder to myself if this is a good sign?

We sit down, he orders a flat white, I order a hot chocolate...little bit of intro and the other manager appears. A little more of an intro and then I get grilled. Then comes the compliments..."you're so confident, where does that come from?" "Thats a good answer, but don't you think it could be this, or that?" etc...

I clarify with my "confident" answers...I'm confident because I'm not riding on this interview to get me a job. I had no expectations...which is always the best way to walk into an interview. After having a 3-way conversation, talking about the projects more in detail, I basically made them feel good about me and my skills and talent.

I'm asked about whether I am "technical", there is hesitation...I explain myself...they are extremely happy with my answer...I get asked what the difference between a URL and the IP Address? I think to myself...don't you know? How do I answer this??? *panic* Well, one is the web address in human terms - words; while the IP is the techie, computer version of the address, were talking numerics. My response sufficed...apparently their PMs wouldn't be able to answer that...and i'm thinking they are bs-ing with me.

I am asked what kind of manager I am? I tell them I focus on people. I always try to balance things for my engineers. Yes, I understand that deliverables need to be met by yesterday but there is no reason why I would have to make the people I work with miserable. It doesn't help with productivity and it doesn't help meeting the deliverables any sooner. Mind you, that doesn't mean I am incapable of being firm and assertive.

I think we chatted for 30 minutes and they offered me a role...we spent another 20 minutes or so sitting there, with the two of them trying to get out of me what they can do to make me say yes. And i drew a blank when they asked me "what can we say or do to make you choose us, other than the other company?"

I was upfront and told them that i was expecting a offer this week by another company. I would really like to work for this other company because I like the culture and what they have to offer me. Something that is unique that they don't offer at theirs. I told them that I would take a couple of days to think...they asked if the weekends were included??? They asked if this other company took too long, would i choose them? They really want me to work with them.

I did come up with something that I wanted to clarify straight up...I told them about my Aunt's wedding in NYC and my friend's wedding in Mauritius...would they let me take 2-3 weeks off over late August and early September?

They said that if I asked later, it would be No, but since I am asking now, the answer is Yes.

I have spoken to a few people and I have decided to take this role. But its not simply because everyone is telling me how good this company is...that it is internationally recognised...that the pay is good...that I will be properly recognised as a PM...it all comes down to my gut feeling.

I feel good about this move. I feel good that they want me so badly that they are drawing up the contract so that I can have it ASAP. They are basically under the impression that the other company still have their cards on the table, so they are trying their best to beat this company with a better hand.

Compared to the other companies I have been interviewing with, I actually "felt the love"...so why would I go anywhere but to a company that wants me?

3 Dresses...

You know that old saying "...always the bridesmaid, never the bride..." and the recent movie where Katherine Heigl plays a girl who was a bridesmaid 27 times?

I'm starting to feel that way.

My aunt just asked me to be one of her bridesmaids for her wedding in NYC.

This will be the 3rd time that I will be a bridesmaid, if I accept. And I haven't yet...is it horrible to say no? I love her and I really want to be at her wedding, but I don't know if I want to be at her wedding as a bridesmaid!!!

I know its completely stupid, but it feels as though if I was a bridesmaid for the 3rd time, I will forever be stuck as a bridesmaid. I will be committed to spinsterhood and will die a terribly lonely death. [melodramatic violins playing in the background over my plight]

Its sad that I can't just say yes and be honoured that she considered me.

Its not like every day that someone asks you to stand beside them on their special day. But then I have had my fair share of experience as a bridesmaid. The last time is still fresh in my memory. The bad side of the experience is still vivid, even though I have accepted what had happened and have moved on.

What do i do? What should i say? Is there any way of telling her "no" without hurting her feelings? Can I really say no???