enfants, gosses...

My personal long standing belief is:

(1) If you don't like kids, you shouldn't have kids;
(2) If you don't want kids, you shouldn't have kids;
(3) If you can't be responsible for your own self, you shouldn't have kids;
(4) If you can't afford to pay for one mouth, what makes you think you can afford for a family???
(5) If you are not ready to have kids, you shouldn't have kids;
(6) There are a countless number of parentless children out there - think about that before you consider bringing another into this world.
(7) I don't think the world is as beautiful a place to live as i did 15 years ago...it has changed and with the rate that we are killing natures resources, i wonder how long it will be before these resources run out and we implode on ourselves. Why would you want to bring a child into such a world? I know a lot of people will disagree with my perspective on this one, but that is how i feel about it.

When i read this post by Sam de Brito (Mr "All Men Are Liars") yesterday, titled Childfree not childless: why kids are a luxury it really got me fired up about those particular people who want/have kids and their stance on another person's choice not to be parents, as a self-absorbed.

I also read this comment someone had left on his previous post, and wondered what bomb would drop...which i guess led to Sam's post on why kids are a luxury.

The comment from the former post is as follows:

"Parenting is all about self-sacrifice and the joys outweigh the negatives but this is something that you self-absorbed childless hedonists will never understand."

I don't deny that parenting is a self-sacrifice, which is why i believe so strongly in the listed points, from 1-7, about whether a person should bring an innocent child into this world or not. Having a child in this day and age, is as Sam describes, a luxury.

I don't believe that a person who chooses not to have children, for whatever their reason, should be called "self-absorbed childless hedonists". I think they are the people you should be patting on the back for avoiding the mistake of becoming resentful, bad parents who raise resentful, bad children that become resentful, bad adults. I mean, they don't want kids. If they had kids, even though they didn't want them, they wouldn't be good parents.

I know this is an extreme point of view, but you and i both know and see a lot of this happening out there. Some people just shouldn't be parents.

And yet they are.

I could copy and paste so much from the "kids are a luxury" post that serves as a "take that" approach of rebuttal to all those people who keep harping on about how its their right to have children and that somehow something is wrong with you if you don't have children, but i should just leave you to read it if you are honestly interested.

J and i were briefly talking about this at work (and i later sent her the link) and while we were discussing kids or no kids, she crossed over to the abortion topic...but i don't want to get into that right now...thats an ugly debate and i don't know exactly where i stand on that one.

(lit: children, kids)