Please tick the one that corresponds to you:

( ) 18 – 24 years of age
( ) 25 – 30 years of age
( ) 31 – 36 years of age
( ) 37 and older.


I read a post on Tocca's Orion in regards to women in their mid 20's being picky and it got me thinking...

If you are 18 – 24, things in your life is just starting out…mostly we spend a good 3-4 years with studying at this point in our lives or some take time out to travel or just to work. It’s the time of experimentation…living life and doing stupid things that you won’t regret…or hope not to regret. Responsibility is low…priorities are pretty low too…relationships are high, I think most are just having fun or trying to have a successful long term relationship, but it just doesn’t really work out. And if it does...you're one of the select few who need not worry about this particular blog today.

Girls in the 25 – 30 age group are pegged as being “picky”. As a female in this category, I actually agree that there are a lot of young ladies who are very choosy out there. But they would term it as “knowing what they want – and there is nothing wrong with that!”

In some ways, I don’t blame them. If you are a young urban professional making enough money to do what you want, when you want…if you have the power of authority at work…if you are very attractive…if you are funny and intellectual…if you are a very sociable person…if you are all of these rolled into one – why wouldn’t you have high standards? A guy any less, probably wouldn’t cope with all that you are!

I can’t speak for the guys who are the reflection of the girls in this group…so I asked a male friend who is an urban professional and is single right now. He wants to be in a relationship with someone, but admittedly he believes that he is a “little” picky when it comes to the girls who he will approach.

Why is that?

Because we can?

I joked with K who finally got to wear the engagement ring she and H got made by the jeweller. (CONGRATS TO THEM BOTH!!! Although, they are like a married couple already…the ring is just part of a public announcement!) I asked her, although she isn’t a ‘single’ or a candidate, if she thought the ladies in our age group are “picky” and she agreed that there were quite a few…she knew many at work! My joke was that the 25 – 30 were a “picky” bunch…the 31 and over were the ones who realised that they were “picky” when they were younger and are now desperate because their clock is ticking or they feel lonely now most of their friends are married! And all the decent guys that they use to overlook when they were 25 – 30, are now married as well.

She laughed. But she also agreed.

So, I believe that the 25 – 30 are a “picky” lot.

Do I think that I’m one of the “picky” girls?

No.

I’ve mellowed. I’ve simplified my wants and I recognise that my needs are not as extravagant as they were when I was 21. I’m actually very flexible and I like the term “compromise”. Just let me rant and rave for a few minutes…and then I come around because I realise that I am being an idiot and I am being impractical. I also acknowledge when I am wrong.

I don’t think I am very attractive…so I don’t look for an attractive guy to be my partner. I think I know my shortfalls all too well now, and so I know I can’t look for someone too “wow”…maybe its out of the fear of bruising my pride, maybe its just vanity, maybe its my insecurity, or maybe its just something…but it makes me want to look for someone imperfect (but decent)…someone like me…who has their own shortfalls…so we can be imperfect together and appreciate that we accept each other as we are.

Great concept, but a pickle to make happen.